Japanese Pie 2
by KitKat8
Summary: *COMPLETE + JP3 preview up!* It's after their first year of college, summer is already here and Yahiko, Sano, Kenshin, and Saito are heading over to Lake Biwa. Are the boys up for another PIE escapade? K/K S/M Y/M
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I don't own RK or American Pie 2 or the "Satisfaction" song. In fact, I don't even know if that's the name of the song! No suing!

  
  


Prologue

  
  


"I can't get no... buh nuh nuh nuh uh uh.... Satisfaction!" Yahiko sang, banging his head to the song on the radio as he drove down the road. He tapped one hand against the steering wheel to the rhythm of the music, thrusting his head up and down, one hand in the rock and roll position. But as he thrust his head down again, he accidently hit his head against the window... hard. 

"OW!" 

Grabbing his aching head, Yahiko forgot about keeping his hands on the steering wheel and he lost control of his car. It swerved to the right, then to the left, all because of Yahiko frantic thrashings, but it finally ended up onto the opposite side of the road. Still in pain, Yahiko wouldn't have noticed the delivery truck heading straight towards him if it hadn't honked it's horn at him.

"Holy shit!" Yahiko exclaimed and he momentarily let go of his lump of a head to steer the wheel back to the right side, almost hitting the oncoming truck in the process. 

He fought for control over the screeching wheels and the rotating body of the car, turning the steering wheel every which way in order to keep the car from toppling onto it's side. Finally, Yahiko slammed on the brakes, causing the car to swing about in vicious circles until gravity decided to give Yahiko and break and it stopped only inches away from a tall cherry blossom tree.

Breathing heavily, his eyes still wide with terror, Yahiko did a quick check on his pulse to see if it was still there, then after feeling the soft thump of his heartbeat, he let out a relieved sigh and he let his head fall down to the steering wheel in exhaustion. At the small impact, the air bag popped out, practically punching him in the face, and the hood of the car burst open, letting thick gray smoke seep out of the front. 

Yahiko kept his head on the wheel, completely frustrated. Rolling his eyes, he batted the air bag cushion away from him and stumbled out of his car with a huff. Coming around to check out the front, he was enveloped in a huge fog of gray mist and he sighed, deciding that he should try and repair what he could.

Yahiko squinted to look through the thick mist, wafting the air away so he could get a closer look at the engine. Pulling his arm back, he scratched his head in confusion. Yahiko knew absolutely nothing about cars whatsoever and obviously wasn't all that great at driving them either. Just to prove it, he idiotically, placed his bare hands over the scorching hot engine.

"Yahhhh!!!!" Yahiko shrieked, drawing his hand back as fast as he could, his skin glowing bright red from what appeared to be third degree burn. He seethed through his teeth, frantically running about in circles over the lawn in front of him, tripping over his own feet as he screamed at the top of his lungs. 

"Ow! Ow! Ow! Errrrrrrr! Fuckin' A! Ahahahaha!" Yahiko fell to the ground again, rolling about the dirt like a dog on fire, and he vigorously blew on his hand to cool it down.

Meanwhile, the whole entire neighborhood had come out to investigate the commotion, only to find their neighbor, Yahiko, had come back from his first year at college, acting like he always did; like an idiot.

"AHAHAHAHAHAH! IT BURNS!" Yahiko wailed from outside, now running in circles again, holding out his hand in front of him, not even smart enough to figure out that there was a hose only about two feet away from him.

Okina sighed from his place in the window, shaking his head at Yahiko's stupidity, and he dropped the curtain back into place. 'He's back....' Okina thought as he headed out the door to help out his arrogant grandson, ice pack in one hand and a pan of homemade apple pie in the other. 

  
  


A/N: HELLO! Okay, first chapter is now up! Of course, you just knew I had to embarrass Yahiko for an opening, right? ^_^ Leave a review!


	2. Reencounters

Disclaimer: I don't own anything! AHHHH! runs away screaming from the government ppl that are trying to sue the pants off me

Chapter 1:

"Reencounters"

  
  


"Alright, moment of truth, and now... We look!" Yahiko said. This was his favorite pastime during college classes and it worked so very well. Discreetly turning his head away from Sanosuke, Yahiko glanced upwards towards the seats on the higher level so he could look up his classmate's skirt and he gasped in surprise at the colorful assortment of red and purple lips on the girl's underwear. "Awww.... Dude!"

Frantically, Yahiko tugged on Sanosuke's sleeve and pointed up at the unsuspecting girl, whispering, "Whoa! Hey, hey, hey! Dude, she's got little lips on her panties! She's got little lips on her panties! Look, you pussy! Look!" 

Sanosuke only rolled his eyes and continued moving to his desk as Yahiko resumed in looking up all the other girls' skirts as they passed by them to get to their desks. Somehow he really got off of that. (A/N: Don't ask me, guys get off of a lot of things... ) 

"Sano! What the hell is wrong with you?! Just take a quick look, alright? Come on, man! Aw, you're no fun!" Yahiko whined, but Sanosuke only kept walking, ignoring his perverted friend's ranting.

Sanosuke wasn't about to sink down to Yahiko's level and steal a look at some girl's underwear when he can get permission from his girlfriend to do that... willingly. He was dedicated to Megumi. Sanosuke doubted if Yahiko even knew the meaning of the word 'commitment' or if he did, he didn't act like it. Taking his seat in the front, Sanosuke took one last look at his notes for the test as Yahiko continued staring at the same girl's drawers in the middle of the classroom with a nod of approval and a slight hint of drool. 

Getting slightly annoyed, their college professor, Anji, tapped Yahiko on the shoulder to get his attention away from the girl's unmentionables. 

"Try to get some on your own time, buddy, not mine," Anji warned, pushing a blushing Yahiko toward his seat in the back of the room and sighed as he handed out the finals exams out to each student. "Put away your notes now and take out a #2 pencil for the exam please."

"You don't even know what you were missing, man!" Yahiko whispered during the test, Sanosuke barely paying attention to a word Yahiko was saying, "Those were some killer panties! I can't believe you didn't look! Come on, there's nothing wrong with just looking! I bet Megumi checks out millions of guys a day! Hell, she's probably doing it right now!"

"Yahiko, shut up and take the damn test," Sanosuke whispered back and Yahiko's mouth clamped shut after viewing the way Sanosuke was practically crushing the pencil in his hand. 

Sano knew there was really no way of knowing if Megumi was as tuned into their relationship as he was, but even if she did look at other guys, he trusted her enough to know that she wouldn't do anything more than that. Yahiko was right in his theory of it was okay to just look, but Yahiko's idea of "looking" was staring down girls' shirts and peeking up their skirts. It just wasn't something Sanosuke thought he should waste his time on.

The test took up to an hour and when Sanosuke was finished, he let out a relieved sigh. At seeing his friend was no longer preoccupied with the exam, Yahiko nudged him in the ribs with his elbow, making him turn to look at Yahiko's paper, only to find that he had filled in the bubbles for his name as, "Bitemyweiner." Sanosuke frowned, but Yahiko smiled at him, proud of his 'clever' nickname and he pointed at it with his index finger.

"It's German," Yahiko announced, "you pronounce it, 'Beit-mei-wayner.'"

Sanosuke laughed, but was immediately shushed by about a dozen other people in the class. Shrinking back, they both got up to turn in their exams at the professor's desk, cringing at the millions of angry eyes glaring at their backs. 

Yahiko, not wanting to pass up the last opportunity he had to look at the girl's underwear again, stole another quick glance before they headed out the door, pausing in the doorway so that he could lean back and get a good last look. 

"You're an idiot," Sanosuke chuckled, shaking his head as he pushed Yahiko out the door, despite his protests that he wanted to stay and look up the girl's skirt some more, "Hurry up, Yahiko. Move it already! I gotta go surprise Megumi at her med school and you stopping every fifteen seconds to check out every single pair of legs that passes by is gonna make me late."

"Not every pair of legs!" Yahiko defended himself, but he lost his point when a pretty sophomore passed them and Yahiko stopped to watch her leave, whistling low as she walked by, "Hey, Cupcake! What's your sign?" 

The girl kept on walking, much to Yahiko's disappointment, and after a few moments, he just shrugged his shoulders. "Okay, uh.... that went well," Yahiko said, nodding his head at his good take on the situation and Sanosuke laughed.

"You might wanna work on those communication skills, Yahiko," Sanosuke offered as he climbed into his car and Yahiko went over to his. The engine was still a little burnt out, but it was still capable of running for a couple more miles. 

"I'll see ya later, Yahiko," Sanosuke said, waving at his friend before he drove out of the parking lot to go see Megumi over at Tokyo University. He had promised to meet her at Saito's party that evening, but instead, he decided to see her a couple hours earlier. 

  
  


Sanosuke reached her college a few minutes before her class got out and he decided to wait out on the front steps of the building she was in, his back to the building's entrance as multiple med school students passed him on their way down the stairs. A few minutes later, Sano heard Megumi's voice in the distance and he automatically stood up, dusting himself off so he could look a little more decent as she approached. She was talking with some guy, laughing about something he said, and even with trust in mind, Sanosuke could still feel a slight twang of jealousy. He walked over and made his presence known.

"You've got to be kidding me!" Megumi laughed to her classmate, the man's ice blue eyes twinkling as he spoke to her, "I mean, you just can't be serious!"

"No, really! I know for a fact that Kamatari got some surgery done. Very special surgery, if you know what I mean," he said and Megumi burst out laughing again.

"Hey Fox," Sanosuke said, interrupting her conversation with the other man.

"Sano!" Megumi cried, throwing her arms around him in a tight embrace, "What're you doing here? I thought I was gonna meet you at the party later!"

"Yeah, well, I decided to drop by and say hey instead," he replied. Turning his attention to Megumi's friend, he put his hand out to shake. "Hi, I'm Sanosuke Sagara."

"Aoshi Shinimori," the man said in return, shaking Sanosuke's offered hand, and after that was done, he turned back to Megumi. "Look, I gotta go, but I'll see you on the plane later, okay? Nice meeting you, Sanosuke."

"Alright, bye!" Megumi called after him as he made his exit. Sanosuke gave a polite nod to him before he walked off, his trench coat blowing out behind him until his silhouette slowly disappeared as he got farther away. 

Turning back to her boyfriend, Megumi started with him down the steps with her arm linked through his. "Well, I was really surprised to see you. We've got a few hours before my flight so I guess that means we have some free time then," she said, comfortably leaning on his shoulder, "Got any ideas of what we can do to pass some time?"

"Actually, I do have an idea in my head. It involves me showing you how much I missed you," Sanosuke said, leading her down to the parking lot and he ushered her inside the passenger seat of his car. Megumi strapped herself in as he went around to his side and got in as well.

"I have a feeling this idea of you showing me how much you missed me revolves around me and you in your bedroom," Megumi replied, her fox ears popping up from the sides of her head, concluding his exact thoughts as if he had actually said them out loud. Sano smiled at how well she was able to read his mind.

"Nah," Sanosuke replied with a sly grin as they drove, "You're only half right about that."

"Explain," Megumi said, folding her arms across her chest as she intently watched him drive.

"Well, you got the 'me and you' part down, but I never said anything about a bedroom," Sanosuke stated, smirking at her as he made a quick glance in her direction before he turned his attention back to the road, "there are plenty of places we can uh... do this idea of mine." This was followed by a great deal of foxy laughter and... uh... mucho ideas...

  
  


Yahiko reached home three hours later, his car going at only twenty miles an hour since the incident earlier that morning, and he hopped out of the seat, slamming the door behind him as he made his way over to the mailbox. It was now officially summer, the time for hanging out with friends, getting a job, getting with girls... Maybe Yahiko thought he would receive a love letter of some sort. 

He flung open the door and flipped through the assortment of junk mail and bills, rolling his eyes at all the advertisements inside. Out of nowhere, a letter from China fell into his hands, addressed to him, the sender's address read the name of Tsubame Sanjou. Yahiko's eyes widened at the sight of her name and he eagerly ripped open the envelope to read whatever she had sent him. 

Tsubame had left Japan in the summer, traveling with her mom all over Europe and Asia; this was the first time Yahiko had heard from her since the party at Saito's. His eyes scanned over the letter, her cursive writing clear and precise, and Yahiko had no trouble at all reading what it said.

Dear Yahiko,

Hey, it's Tsubame! I hope you still remember me because I still remember you. I tried calling you at your house a few times, but I always ended up speaking to your grandfather since you were never there when I called. Oh and could you please tell him that I will make sure that I watch Cats on Broadway? He insisted that I go. Anyways, I hope all is well over there and I just wanted to let you know that I'll be coming back to Tokyo in about a month! I can't wait to see you! Until then! XOXO

Love,

Tsubame

P.S. I'll try and call you again soon!

  
  


After reading the letter, Yahiko re-read the last sentence again, making sure that his eyes weren't playing tricks on him and sure enough, it said that she was coming back to Tokyo.

Yahiko slowly closed his eyes, remembering her sweet face and smile, then he looked back at the letter again, reading the P.S. message over, and his face grew grim as he heard the phone ring from inside the house. 

'Shit! It's Tsubame! It's Tsubame!' Yahiko thought and he darted over to the front door, throwing it open so fast the hinges creaked, and he raced over to the phone. Picking it up off the receiver, he quickly brought it up to his ear, but instead ended up aiming a little to the left and poking himself in the eye with the antennae to answer it. "OW!"

"Uh, h... hello?" Yahiko answered the phone, almost dropping it in his rush to bring it up to his ear, but he quickly grabbed at it before it hit the ground. His heavy breathing came out in short wheezes as he struggled to speak clearly and he repeated himself in a calmer tone. "Hello?"

"Yahiko? Is that you?" Tsubame asked on the other line and Yahiko's face brightened to the point that it looked like he was about to explode as soon as he heard her voice, "It's me, Tsubame!"

"Tsubame, hey! Yeah, it's me! Uh, I was just thinkin' about you. I knew it was you, Tsubame, I recognized your voice," Yahiko said, holding onto his heart that was still racing from the mad dash he had just made from outside or maybe it was just his excitement for hearing from her. "How are you?"

"I'm great! Were you really thinking about me?" Tsubame asked, smiling as she twirled the phone wire around her finger, "'cause I'm coming over there to visit you in about a month! Isn't that great?!"

"Yeah, it is! I... uh... was actually really surprised that you called," Yahiko said, "I mean, I didn't think you'd even remember me..."

"Well, of course I remember you! Who could forget your little escapade on the internet?!" Tsubame exclaimed, making Yahiko's smile falter at the mention of his splat attack, "In fact, I was kinda thinking that maybe you had forgotten all about me! I mean, there's no way I was gonna forget someone like you, you sexy boy! In a month, I'll be able to see you again and I hope you'll be ready for me when I get back to Tokyo, Yahiko!"

Yahiko's face became expressionless and he almost dropped the phone at her last comment. His brain grew into a giant glob of images of Tsubame, the girl he had been pawning over for the last year and a half since their time as seniors at Jinchuu. 

'Be ready...?' Yahiko thought after they both exchanged good-byes and farewells, his hand slowly losing it's ability to lift up any amount of weight as the phone slid from his palm and fell to the floor. The batteries fell out in the process, but Yahiko wouldn't have even noticed if the phone had been shoved up his ass. His entire mind was boggled at the very thought of seeing Tsubame again and what exactly she had in mind to do with him was more than his idea of heavenly bliss. He could feel the hard-on coming already. He unconsciously slid down the nearby wall until he was sitting on the ground, his eyes focused on no particular thing at all when he finally snapped out of it. 

With Tsubame coming back, he had about a month to get ready for her. Tsubame was going to be expecting a lot from him and he didn't even have the slightest idea of how to unhook a bra. Biting down on his lip, Yahiko wandered off into his older brother, Yutaro's room to use his computer, but he tripped over something left carelessly on the floor.

"Jesus! Is the whole world out to hurt me or something?!" Yahiko shouted out into the air and as if it was all planned out, a baseball flew in from the window and hit him right between the eyes, leaving a big red circle on his forehead from the impact. "Great, just great..." Yahiko murmured with a nod, peeling the baseball of his forehead in the process, "Yeah, thanks a lot... Now what the hell did I trip on?" 

Yahiko rubbed the sore spot on his forehead and turned around to find his brother's scrapbook on the floor. Curiously, he took the book into his lap, flipping through the pages until he landed on one particular page the caught his attention. His eyes widened as the perfect idea popped into his head and he frantically grabbed for the phone, dialing Sanosuke's number without even looking at the buttons. 

He brought the phone to his ear and waited. The phone rang for about ten minutes, but still no one picked up.

"Shit, Sano, quit messing around with your girlfriend and answer your god damn phone!" Yahiko yelled into the receiver, grumbling curses under his breath as he hung up and dialed his other friend, Kenshin's, phone number and brought the phone back to his ear.

"Hello?" Kenshin answered, rubbing his eyes as he yawned, having just woken up from his afternoon nap, "Oh, Yahiko, how are you?"

"Kenshin, I've got the perfect idea for how to spend our summer! It's perfect!" Yahiko exclaimed, gripping the phone so hard his hands turned white, "We're going to Lake Biwa!"

  
  


A/N: First chapter's up! Woohoo! Okay, well, I know that Tsubame is being way OOC right now but she was like this in the first one too. BTW, this story is gonna have a lot more of my original input than the first one did. It has a few more twists that I think will make the plot a little more interesting. And yeah! Aoshi's in this one! I dunno if you think that's good or bad, but lemme know if you liked this chapter! Come on, it's not that hard to push a button!


	3. One Stinking Situation After Another

Disclaimer: Okay, this is the last time I'm gonna say it cuz this is taking up valuable writing space, I don't own RK or American Pie 1 or 2!  
  


Chapter 2:

"One Stinking Situation After Another"  
  


"Lake Biwa, man, it's the greatest party spot in Japan!" Yahiko announced, throwing his arms up in the air to show his excitement, "The babes'll be all over the place prancing around in bikinis!"

"Oro?! Bikinis?!" Kenshin asked. Well, that got his attention. Even if he would never admit this to anyone, Kenshin had a thing for bikinis, a fetish actually, and having a flock full of girls in them was a total system overload for his mind. 'Bikinis... everywhere... girls in bikinis... Kaoru in a bikini...' Kenshin thought to himself, completely forgetting the fact that Yahiko was still there and he failed to notice himself drooling.

"Kenshin?" Yahiko questioned, snapping Kenshin out of his triple X rated thoughts with a few waves of his hands in front of his face and Kenshin quickly dabbed at the side of his mouth of his drool, smiling nervously as he tried wiping up the puddle of saliva on the table with the elbow of his shirt's sleeve.

"Ehehe... that sounds like a great idea, Yahiko, that it does," Kenshin said nervously, trying his best to cover up the hint he had shown of his rare perverted nature, "Uh... I have to go now!" 

"But!" Yahiko started, but Kenshin was already up and out of sight before he could even finish. 

Kenshin ran all the way up the stairs of Saito's house, avoiding all the party goers that got in his way as he continued up the steps to see Kaoru. He just couldn't get her out of his mind. Every single second that passed by, every little thing that he saw, reminded him of her, brought him back to that faithful night when he and Kaoru... His thoughts trailed off as he reminisced for what seemed to be the tenth time today, the night they spent together after prom. She had been a goddess, making him feel things he never thought possible; well, not capable of feeling on his own anyway. Things that required someone else to do, and not just anyone, but someone perfect. And in his opinion, Kaoru was that person.

Kenshin knocked softly on her door, whispering as loud as he dared to, praying to God that Saito wouldn't see him and he gently pushed open the door, revealing the pleasant scent of her perfume. He inhaled deeply and walked deeper inside.

"Kaoru? Are you in here?" Kenshin whispered into the air, but no one answered. Looking around the corners of her room and finding no one, Kenshin headed over to her dresser. He turned his head to check for anyone watching him and in seeing that the coast was clear, he opened up one of her drawers. Inside there displayed a neat row of t-shirts aligned and folded up to perfection, and he picked one up, bringing it to his face so he could rub it against his cheek. It was just like holding her.

The overwhelming memories all suddenly rushed back to him, so gentle and intriguing, but were so quickly interrupted by a loud slamming of the door behind him.

"What the HELL are you doing in my house?!" Saito shouted from the doorway, causing the hairs on the back of Kenshin's neck to stand on end at the angry tone in his voice.

"Now, Saito, you should calm down, that you should," Kenshin tried to reason with him, putting his hands up in surrender as if he were negotiating with a crazy man at gunpoint, "I think you should just take a deep breath and..."

"Get outta my house, you little fucker!" Saito threatened as he jumped over the bed that separated them, lunging for Kenshin's throat, his goal set to kill.

"ORO?!" Kenshin screamed, running for his life as Saito bounded down the stairs after him, shaking his fist at him the whole way down, mostly because he had no sharp object at the time to use. "Ororororororo!"

"Shit-Break!!!" Saito shouted, chasing after the red head with his hands outstretched to ring his neck as he quickly gained on him, "Get the hell outta my house!"

Kaoru stood in front of the mirror, air drying her damp hair with her towel when a loud shriek filled her ears. The voice was gentle and oh so recognizable to her and Kaoru frowned as she heard the shrill cry followed by a loud bounding down the stairs. The first thought that ran through her mind was that her brother, Saito, was having a party today. A reunion party. And that meant that Kenshin was invited... 

Kaoru dropped her towel to the floor, running out of the bathroom to see a familiar flash of red hair whizz past as the person ran down the stairs, Saito at their heels, shaking his arms wildly about as her brother constantly swore and cursed.

"Kenshin?!" Kaoru exclaimed, running down the steps after the man she had missed so much during the past year at college, praying silently that her brother hadn't found some sort of weapon to beat him with. The back of her robe flew behind her as she ran down to catch up with them and she found Yahiko struggling to hold back Saito as Kenshin tried to hide behind a table, looking like he was about to pee in his pants.

"You get outta my house right now!" Saito shouted, unaware of Kaoru standing behind him in her bathrobe, "Get over here so I can punch the white off your face!"

"Saito, calm down," Yahiko insisted, pushing him back again as Saito tried to advance in his plan of decapitating Kenshin, "we went through this last summer! Kenshin ended up with a black eye and you ended up with six stitches!"

"He started it!" Saito protested, pointing at Kenshin as if to prove his conviction, "That little fucker bit me!"

"Well, you were trying to break every single bone in my body! It was self-defense, that it was!" Kenshin defended himself, hoping that Yahiko's hold on Saito was strong enough to leave him with at least a few of his limbs, "You can't blame me for wanting to stay alive, that you can't!"

"Yeah, well, you should've thought about that before you go screwing around with my sister, asshole!" Saito yelled, again, trying to push back Yahiko, but the smaller man held fast, "Let me go! You don't want any of this, Yahiko!"

"Hajime, stop it!" Kaoru suddenly yelled from behind him, causing everyone at the party to turn and stare, "That's enough out of you! Just leave him alone already! God!" More than fed up, Kaoru pushed past her brother, taking Kenshin's arm to lead him out from under the dinner table, and she ran her hand over his cheek with a look of concern. "Are you okay, Kenshin?"

"Ah, fuck this!" Saito said, rolling his eyes at their display of affection, and he shoved past Yahiko, grabbing Kenshin by the collar and he dragged him over to the door, "See ya later, Shit-Break!" And with that, Saito tossed him out onto the lawn, Kenshin shouting out an astonished, "Oro?!" before he got a face full of dirt.

"Kenshin!" Kaoru wailed, running for the door, but Saito slammed it shut before she could get outside and comfort him. "Hajime, what the hell are you doing?! Open this door right now!"

"Kaoru! One more word outta you and I'm gonna go out there to kill your little boyfriend! So unless you want that, you shut up and get your ass upstairs! And what the hell are you doing down here in your bathrobe?! Get some damn clothes on! And don't call me HAJIME! Shit!" Saito snapped, pointing at the staircase. Kaoru ran up the steps in tears, screaming that she hated him and that he was the worst human being in the world before slamming the door to her room.

Saito turned back around, finding the entire party staring at him with wide eyes. Acting like that sort of thing happened every day, he drew in a puff from his cigarette, shifting his weight to the other foot.

"What the hell are you looking at?!" Saito spat, making all his guests cower in fear and the party continued on as if nothing even happened, not wanting to become the next Kenshin, and Saito smiled in satisfaction. "Now that's better. Hey, Tokio! I'm heading out back, I uh... got some champagne that I've been saving up for a special occasion. Wanna join me?"

How could anyone turn that down? Tokio smiled and followed him outside to the back porch as he ran to the basement to get out the expensive champagne and two tall glasses.  
  


Meanwhile, at Tokyo airport...

"Last call for boarding flight 13 for America!" the flight agent called just as Megumi and Sanosuke ran up to the terminal, carry-on baggage in hand and completely out of breath. The flight attendant smiled. "Do you have your ticket?"

"Yeah, right here," Megumi said, handing the woman her boarding pass and the woman gave her a brochure for traveling on their airlines. Turning back to Sanosuke, Megumi took her bag from him and placed it over her own shoulder. "Well, this is it," she said, shifting uncomfortably under the weight of the bag, "America is gonna be really lonely without a certain Rooster-Head around with me."

"Yeah, well, you're gonna have a great time with or without me," Sanosuke said and he squeezed her hand, "Call me when you get there, alright?" Megumi nodded. "Oh, and one more thing," Sanosuke added in a low whisper, his left hand going to cover one side of his mouth to hide his words from the flight attendant, "is it seriously illegal if you bring foreign food across countries?" Megumi laughed and shook her head at him.

"Bye, Sano," Megumi said, reaching up to kiss him, a little longer than usual and definitely not appropriate for a public airport. Finally breaking apart, she gave him one last hug before she headed down the hall leading to the plane, a pouty look on her face. "I'll see you in a few weeks then! Bye!"

"Have fun," Sanosuke called after her, waving one last time before she disappeared down the corridor and he sighed dejectedly. Turning around to head out, Sanosuke found that the entire seating area population was staring at him. Sanosuke laughed nervously, reveling about their reaction to the intense good-bye kiss Megumi had given him, and he put his hand behind his head for a good old scratch. 

"Eheh... That's my girlfriend," Sanosuke said to his 'audience,' trying to casually address the situation as he pointed in the direction Megumi had just gone, "Yeah, she's my girlfriend... Uh huh, okay, see ya later..."

Sanosuke awkwardly left the terminal, all eyes on his back until he was off the floor and inside the elevator. Heaving a sigh of relief from the lack of eyes boring into him, he leaned back against the elevator wall and tried not to think about how long the three weeks were going to seem like with Megumi gone. 'And now to Saito's party,' he thought, suddenly remembering his separate life besides his girlfriend, 'Hope Kenshin's doing all right...'  
  


Back at the party, Kenshin had somehow been let inside the house again by an anonymous person (they preferred not to have their name mentioned due to the circumstances that Saito would totally kick their ass) and everyone made it a point to tell the red head that Saito was out in back with Tokio and that his life was spared. For now anyway... Yahiko patted him on the back and brought him over to the table, sitting him down to continue their conversation about their trip to Lake Biwa.

"So, what do you think? You wanna go to Lake Biwa or what?" Yahiko asked, leaning forward across the table, "The trip'd be kinda weird if you weren't there, but hey! If you don't wanna go and check out the hotties at the beach, that's fine. More for me then! Haha!"

"I think Lake Biwa is the best idea I've heard come out from your mouth since that pact thing!" Kenshin exclaimed, smiling wide at the thought of bamboozles of girls surrounding them in bikinis, "Count me in! I'm going, that I am!"

"Hey guys!" Sanosuke said, finally arriving from dropping Megumi off at the airport, and he took a seat next to Yahiko. Pulling out the last chair, he put his head down on the table, propping up his elbow, and he turned to look at them. "Where are you going, Kenshin?" he asked, having heard the last bit of their conversation.

"Dude, we're all going to Lake Biwa!" Yahiko said excitedly, "We're renting a beach house over there for the summer and we're gonna have parties day in and day out! You coming with us or are you gonna stay here and wait by the phone 'til your girlfriend calls?"

"Hell yeah, I'm there!" Sanosuke announced, slamming his hand down on the table, "It's about time we get outta this rathole of a city! This is gonna be great! A beach outside, good food, cheap ass renting surf boards... Plus I can always just call up the fox whenever I want with my phone card! So when do we go?"

"As soon as I can figure out who else we can bring to help out with the rental," Yahiko said with a sigh, tapping his pen against the notepad in front of him filled with numbers and calculations of the cost of food, supplies, and all the essentials that they would need. "We need one more person to go with us or we can't afford it all."

"But who could we take with us?" Kenshin asked, just as they heard two people talking outside.  
  


"Alright, Hajime, just close your eyes, I've got a surprise for you," Tokio whispered into his ear and he grinned at her suggestion.

"Okay! This outta be fun," Saito said as he obeyed her, closing his eyes as she made her way behind his chair, champagne bottle in hand, completely unaware of what was going on at the balcony above them as Shishio ran out to the balcony, frustrated from the long line to the bathroom and he unzipped his pants.

"Man, why does everybody have to go use the crapper right now?" Shishio said to no one in particular as he began peeing over the balcony edge. Just then Houji walked over behind him.

"Ah, shit..." Shishio rolled his eyes as his friend approached him. Not wanting Houji to see what he was doing, he only half turned around to face him, plastering a fake smile on his face as he continued going over the balcony.

"Shishio! Long time, no see, huh?" Houji said, patting his friend on the back, "How're you doing?"

"I... uh... I've been better," Shishio said truthfully, continuing his bathroom ritual, barely missing Tokio and Saito on the bottom floor, "Listen, can you get me a beer from downstairs?"

"Yeah, sure, I'll be right back," Houji said and he walked off towards the balcony door.

Quickly, Shishio turned to check if his friend was finally gone, but he ended up knocking over a pot from the balcony edge in the process and it fell down to the first floor, hitting Tokio over the head and knocking her out cold.

"Hey, this is kinda kinky," Saito said, his eyes still closed as he anxiously awaited her little surprise and he felt something being poured over his head, "Whoa! Hey! That's right, pour it over my head! Wow! How'd you get it all nice and warm?" Reaching up, he ran his hands through his dampened hair as the 'champagne' poured over his head. "Aw, dude, I can practically taste the bubbles!" Sticking out his tongue to lick the liquid off his lips, Saito drew back as he tasted what he thought was champagne. 

"Actually, no, I can't.... Hey, wait a second... Tokio, what kind of champagne is this?" Saito asked, but he received no response. Confused, Saito frowned as he turned around only to find Tokio unconscious on the floor. "Tokio? Uh.... Tokio? ..... Oh, fuck..."

"Much better," Shishio said, zipping up his pants as he finished up his business and walked back to the party, feeling ten pounds lighter and totally obliviously to the shower he had just given to the host of the party.

Saito looked up at the balcony overhead, the truth of what was really being poured over him finally taking it's toll on his brain and he got up and ran back inside the house, his clothes soaked with human waste and his hair matted to his forehead. He turned to Sanosuke, Yahiko, and Kenshin sitting at the table just outside the back door, quelling looks on their faces as if to say, 'What happened to you?' Saito didn't even notice Kenshin's unwanted presence in his house as he looked from one face to another, his own face as pale as rice and he stuttered out the words, "I got... peed on..."

"I think we found our man," Yahiko said, dropping the ink pen down on the table, as if declaring the final decision of who would accompany them to Lake Biwa as the fourth party, "Saito, hit the showers, we're going to Lake Biwa."  
  


A/N: Always remember... Champagne is never naturally warm! Leave a review for me and I give you another chapter! Come on! It's a win-win situation! Buh bai!


	4. Who Says You Can't Teach An Old Dog New ...

Disclaimer: Yeah, I know I said I wasn't gonna put anymore disclaimers, but hey! I don't wanna get sued! I don't own RK or American Pie 2!  
  


Chapter 3:

"Who Says You Can't Teach An Old Dog New Tricks?"  
  


"This is the place you rented?" Kenshin breathed, looking about the beach house with astonished awe, his mouth wide open as he examined the place from the first floor, looking up at all the exquisite features of the place, "It's like a palace, that it is."

"Woohoo! I get to choose my room first!" Sanosuke shouted as he ran up the stairs, interrupting the quiet admiration Kenshin, Yahiko, and Saito had fallen into as they entered the house. "Hah! Master bedroom's mine!"

"You moron, you can't just call master bedroom," Saito grumbled, tossing his cigarette down on the floor and he ground it down with his foot. He had wanted the master bedroom all for himself. Master bedroom automatically equaled the most bed action and he really wanted some of that. The fact that Sanosuke had now even stepped inside the room made Saito give it up without any hesitation. He'd rather have your average-Joe bedroom than have to stay in one that the moron had set foot in.

"I'm raiding the fridge!" Yahiko yelled, pushing past Saito in his effort to rush over to the refrigerator. He hoped that the last renter had left them some kind of welcome gift, a basket of cheese, a box of cookies... it didn't matter, just as long as it was edible! But what was in the fridge instead was a little over the top. 

Pulling out a nice bottle of aged champagne, Yahiko grinned, nodding his head in approval. "Oh yeah, baby!" he exclaimed, lifting the bottle up in the air as if to use it as a flag and claim a spot of newfound land, "Time to get drunk!"

"Yahiko, maybe we should save that for a special occasion," Kenshin suggested. If there were going to be women around the house soon then they might as well give them the best drink they could offer, and right now, that leftover champagne was it. Kenshin saw Saito cringe at the sight of the alcohol bottle and he bit his lip to keep from laughing out right at him. And not just a regular old chuckle, but more like an outburst of cracking up and pointing at him, but Kenshin decided against it. He knew better than to mess with Hajime Saito, who was capable of tackling even the three-hundred pound, Toramaru, captain of the wrestling team at Jinchuu. Now if, Saito could tackle someone two times Kenshin's weight, he'd hate to think what he could do with a puny little guy like him. Besides, that, he was already on Saito's bad side about the whole Kaoru thing, and he wasn't going for aggravating Saito's hate for him anymore than necessary.

"I don't think I'll be up for any champagne any time soon," Saito said, keeping his dignity in place as he picked up his things and headed upstairs, passing Sanosuke, who was on his way back down, "Move it, moron!"

Sanosuke frowned at the man, rolling his eyes as he let the insult pass. Actually, the name wasn't even really considered an insult anymore, more like just Saito's way of saying his name. If it had bothered him before, Sanosuke could care less now. He went back down the steps, shrugging his shoulders at Saito's less-than-grateful attitude for bringing him along and he stood in front of Kenshin and Yahiko, who had still not even gone upstairs yet.

"Are you two just gonna stand there and wait for the roof to fall in so you can see the rest of the house?" Sanosuke asked, grinning at them as Kenshin gave him a blank expression and Yahiko popped the cork to the champagne bottle, causing at least a third of it to bubble over.

"Screw special occasion!" Yahiko announced, lifting his glass up in the air in toast before he swung it to his lips and drank it down to a fourth of the bottle, "I wanna get drunk already! hiccup Whoa... You guys have gotta try this! This shit is pretty strong... hiccup"

Kenshin and Sanosuke exchanged worried glances. They both knew just how low Yahiko's tolerance of alcohol was and he was now, undoubtedly, smashed. And besides that, the champagne on the floor that he had spilled was probably already starting to get sticky. Jeez, they had just arrived and already they had made a mess. 

Sanosuke and Kenshin watched Yahiko as he swaggered over to them, trying to pick up his luggage, but missing by a mile, and he tripped over an imaginary kink in the rug. Sanosuke and Kenshin winced as he hit the floor, but made no move to help him. Yahiko got weird when he was drunk. Why last time there was even a big contemplation of what sex Yahiko was really interested in... (Let's not go into detail about that though...) Sanosuke and Kenshin stood their ground as he got back up and wandered over to them. They were ready for anything.

"Dudes, I just wanted to say that hiccup I love you guys!" Except that.

"You all rock! hiccup And you know what?!" Yahiko slurred, stumbling about as he tried his best to stand erect, "Tsubame's coming back to Tokyo in a month! hiccup And she wants to get it on with me... And that's a hiccup big problem 'cause I'm lousy in bed! hiccup" 

"Yahiko, how could you possibly know that?" Kenshin asked, the idea of knowing your own martial status in the bedroom sounding quite impossible to him, "I think you are just too drunk right now, Yahiko. You're just not thinking too clear, that you aren't."

"Hey! I ain't...!" Yahiko paused, tilting his head to the side in confusion, "Wait... What'd you call me...?" Kenshin and Sanosuke sweat dropped... again.

"Well, you know, there's only one person that actually knows just how bad you are," Sanosuke said, taking a seat in the soft leather couch, "So where is Misao this summer anyway?"

"Well, I'm not sure, but I think I have a pretty good idea..." Yahiko said, plopping down in the seat next to him, champagne bottle still in hand, "I've tried talking to her though, hiccup but I never got a hold of her after prom. hiccup"

"Come on, Yahiko," Sanosuke said, getting up from his seat and then helping his drunken friend to his feet, "I'll drive you over to East Falls band camp." Sanosuke took out his car keys and swung them about on his index finger like a helicopter, but he immediately stopped when the phone rang. 

All three guys' eyes widened as they stared at the phone, all hoping that maybe it was either Tsubame, Megumi, or Kaoru on the other end. They all turned to look at each other one last time before lunging for it, tripping over each other in the process and landing in a heap on the hardwood floor. 

"ORO!"

"Get off me!"

"Dude, hiccup your elbow's digging into my... uh... hiccup leg thingy that's attached to... hiccup Oh hell! Just get up!"

Not wanting to pass up the opportunity to mock them, Saito casually strolled down the stairs and over to the phone, stepping on the three men on the floor as he did this and picked it up on the third ring.

"Hello? Saito's house of meat popsicles. You pick 'em, we stick 'em," Saito answered, then paused to listen to the person on the other line, turning around so that Sanosuke, Yahiko and Kenshin couldn't hear everything, "Oh, you are? Yeah, we have tons of room here. That's fine, it's just me and the idiots... Sure, you can bring your friends. Uh huh, yeah. Okay, see you then."

Saito hung up the phone and stepped on all three of them again to get back to his room, all the while leaving the dismantled group widely curious as to who was on the phone.

"Saito, was that your...?" Kenshin asked, his hopes soaring high that it had been Kaoru on the phone, but he was shut up by Saito continuing up the stairs, a particular finger pointing up in the air. Saito hadn't even bothered to look at him as he made his way up the stairs and he called back without even turning around.

"Go choke some dick, Shit-Break," Saito called, then closed the door to his room with a slam.

"Touch-y...hiccup" Yahiko said as he got up and helped Kenshin and Sanosuke to their feet, dusting himself off and he clapped his hands together once he was done, "Still up for makin' a trip to band camp?" Sanosuke and Kenshin only smiled in answer and Sano patting Yahiko on the back as they made their way out to his car.  
  


Music blared from trumpets, flutes, saxophones, and just about every other instrument ever invented on Earth. It was all coordinated and rehearsed, practically perfect in every aspect, all besides the fact that it was the most boring thing Yahiko, Sanosuke, and Kenshin had ever been to. Kenshin tried his best to smile at the ongoing parade of band camp students, but it faltered after about two minutes of standing there and being forced to listen to the same song being played over and over again. Sanosuke placed his hands in his pockets, trying not to nod off and accomplish the goal of falling asleep standing straight up. Yahiko, however, was repeatedly jumping up in the air to overlook the amazing crowd of people with instruments, but he couldn't see Misao anywhere. There was absolutely no way she wasn't here, after all, band camp was, according to Misao, her entire life. Yahiko sighed and pushed his way through the numerous band geeks as he made his way further into the population. Sanosuke and Kenshin shrugged, calling out that they would wait in the car and they headed back to the parking lot so Yahiko could spend some catch-up time with his former stalker.

Yahiko walked past a young boy, but he immediately ran back to ask for directions as soon as he noticed that the boy was carrying a flute.

"Excuse me, do you know where I could find Misao Makimachi?" Yahiko asked and the boy only stared back at him blankly, "Uh, did you hear me?"

"We're not supposed to have guests here at band camp because this one time, here, we had a visitor and he made us play this game. I dunno if you know it, but it's called Spin the Bottle and we had to kiss people on the lips! I had no idea what I was doing, so I just kept playing and playing and nobody knew what I was doing and it was so funny!" the boy rambled on and on, making Yahiko dizzy with the familiar feeling of being overwhelmed with too many stories.

"Okay, you've got to know Misao," Yahiko concluded, the obvious connection between the two band camp goers making him feel extremely uncomfortable, "Look, just tell me where I can find her and I'll tell you what you can do for fun with your music sheets, okay?"

"She's teaching the girls their flute lessons out in the forest. If you reach the tall oak, then you've gone too far," the boy said, pointing in the direction Yahiko was supposed to take.

"Thanks, kid," Yahiko said and he jogged over to the sound of flutes tooting in the distant trees in the forest, ignoring the kid's shouts of what interesting things he could do with music sheets. 

Yahiko ran until the oak tree was only a foot away and the sounds of playing flutes were behind the bushes. 'I can't just go over there like this,' Yahiko thought, frantically looking for something he could use to blend in to the crowds and he grabbed a spare trumpet lying on the ground behind him, 'Here we go. Misao should be just behind these bushes.' Yahiko pushed the shrubs aside and stepped out into the clearing, when suddenly a huge crowd of people broke out in applause at his appearance. 

'What the...?!' Yahiko thought, his eyes scanning over the crowds in search of his old prom date, but a voice to his left grabbed his attention.

"Yahiko!" Misao hissed, dressed up for concert band with a flute in her hand, "What are you doing here?!" She definitely recognized her old prom date. How could she forget?! Yahiko was a one of a kind guy and yet, here he was at band camp, without any knowledge whatsoever on how to play the trumpet and he was impersonating the mentally challenged boy, Petey, that was supposed to play for the audience. What he was doing here, Misao had no idea, but she had a feeling that it had something to do with her. 'Yahiko, I'd like to see yourself get out of this one,' Misao thought, slapping her hand to her forehead as she watched Yahiko stare wide-eyed back at the crowd, too scared to think straight.

"Hey, isn't that Yahiko?" Sanosuke asked, turning to Kenshin on his left. The two of them heard about a concert that was going to be played as soon as the 'star' came and they were both very surprised to see Yahiko on stage.

"ORO?! It is!" Kenshin exclaimed in surprise as he watched Yahiko fidget on stage, shifting uncomfortably from his right foot to his left, "I guess he's gonna have to play as the special child, that he is."

"Yeah!!!" Sanosuke suddenly shouted from the silent crowd, his yell cutting through the silence like a razor sharp knife as he stood from his seat, and Yahiko sweat dropped, "Go, Petey!! You can do it, buddy! Petey! Petey! Petey!" Sanosuke started to chant; Kenshin following in his chanting only seconds later, and soon enough, the entire crowd was yelling for Petey, erm... Yahiko.

Yahiko's face lost it's pale expression, the encouragement raising a new confidence inside him, and he nodded his head with them in agreement. 'If I'm gonna go along with this charade, I might as well finish it with a big bang!' Yahiko thought and he lifted his hand up in a rock and roll sign.

"Yeaaaaaaah! Rock and roll, dude!" Yahiko shouted above the crowd, finally getting into his act and he put his hands up in the air. Even Misao was smiling as she watched him place the trumpet to his lips and blow as hard as he could. The crowd sat back down, listening to "Petey" play, huge smiles on their faces. Sanosuke and Kenshin almost burst out laughing as Yahiko got really into the performance and he began dancing around on stage as he continued to toot his horn. Trumpet music? Hah! A four year old could come up with better music out of his ass! Yahiko was an unorthodox dancer, trumpeting his way in circles, marching a little as he went, all the while pulling in and out the small bar of the trumpet to increase the volume. It was more than obvious that he had no idea what the hell he was doing, but the crowd decided that being a "special" child, what did they really expect. After a good ten minutes of tooting, Yahiko let out one last big one, and finally finished with a shimmy jazz hands.

The crowd politely clapped at the unusual, but still very entertaining performance by the mentally retarded eleven year old boy named Petey that they thought had just performed. Sano and Kenshin stood up to give their friend a standing ovation. 

"Yeah, baby, yeah! Thank you, East Falls, you're beautiful!" Yahiko shouted and the whole crowd stood to it's feet at his compliment, clapping and cheering for him, "Yeah! My name is Petey! And I have gigantic balls! Who's your daddy, East Falls?! Who's your daddy?!"

The crowd fell silent, everyone cautiously sitting back down as Yahiko finally realized the error in what he said. 'Holy shit...' Yahiko thought as he slowly backed away, dropping the trumpet on the ground, and he darted off stage as fast as he could with about two dozen band camp instructors at his heels. Shocked, Misao stood up and ran after him, ignoring the confused stares from her band mates as she ran off the stage as well.

In the audience, Sanosuke was the first to stand. Slowly, he rose from his seat and he began a slow clap, the speed increasing as well as the volume and everyone turned back to stare at him. He continued clapping anyway and he cheered his friend on even though he was a whole ways away already.

"Yeah, you do! You be proud of your balls!" Sanosuke shouted, causing the entire crowd to gape at him and in finally realizing that fact, Sanosuke's clapping slowed. Flashing the crowd a nervous smile, he turned to Kenshin, who was now so low in his chair that Sanosuke barely saw him. "Uh... Okay, Kenshin, let's get outta here..." He picked the shorter man up by his shirt sleeve and they both cautiously walked out of the stadium, all eyes on them, and after a few slow steps, they bolted as soon as they were close enough to the exit.  
  


Yahiko leaned against the tall oak tree, completely out of breath, and he straightened up when a herd of angry band camp supervisors ran by, mumbling to themselves about how they couldn't stand American foreigners. Yahiko relaxed as soon as they were out of ear shot, closing his eyes and breathing a sigh of relief that he was safe.

"Yahiko?" Misao whispered cautiously, edging forward into the forest, right behind the large tree, "Yahiko, where are you?"

"Misao!" Yahiko exclaimed, jumping out from behind the tree, startling Misao practically out of her skin and she fell backwards onto the dirt floor, "Uh... you okay?"

"Don't scare me like that!" Misao whispered harshly, rubbing her sore bottom as she got up from her place on the ground, "It'd be just like this one time, uh... here, when there was this guy named Ryo and he was my date for a dance. And he just jumped out of nowhere to surprise me and I screamed and everyone laughed at me, but I didn't care because it was so funny! Anyway, I lost my point... Oh yeah! What are you doing here?"

"Misao, this is gonna be really random, but I just need to know. Do you remember that night we spent together after prom?" Yahiko asked, taking hold of her shoulders so he could help her back up, "I mean, do you remember how my uh... performance was? Like was I any good or what?"

"Oh, that! Wow! How could I forget?!" Misao exclaimed. Yahiko took this as a good sign, but his pride was squished down to the size of a pea at the next thing she said. "You sucked ass! You had no idea what the heck you were doing, and... and I don't think you even knew which direction you were going! Yeah, you sucked... like totally."

"Excuse me? I sucked...? Totally?" Yahiko repeated, crossing his hands over his chest in defense, "Uh huh, okay... Awful, bad, horrible... Wait, was it like a I-can-put-up-with-it kind of bad or a bad-bad kind of bad?" Misao couldn't see it, but Yahiko had crossed his fingers behind his back.

"It was a bad-bad kind of bad," Misao answered honestly, then suddenly realizing that she had hurt his feelings, she drew back, "Oh! I'm sorry! I mean..! Oh, Jesus... Well, uh... I've had worse if that makes you feel any better."

"No, not really," Yahiko said. He suddenly wished that he hadn't come here at all, that he could have just stayed at the beach house and waited until Tsubame came so she could judge for herself. Finding out that he was even worse a lover than he first thought wasn't exactly Yahiko's best pep talk and Misao trying to apologize for it was only adding to the agony. "No, actually, hearing that you've had worse doesn't help at all," Yahiko continued, tucking his hands in his pockets, "Cause this guy or guys that were worse than me could've been like drunk or high somehow and you know what? I was stone sober! They were probably so bad because they were stoned and/or drunk off their asses and now I don't have an excuse for sucking in bed!"

"Well, uh... I'm sorry, maybe I shouldn't have told you like that. But, I can give you a few pointers and suggestions if you like," Misao offered. She felt bad about telling him just how awful he really was and the truth hurts. The least she could do was tell him how he could improve his skills; what little he had anyway. Besides, she felt sorry for him, being in such a depressed state he was in made her a little more cautious of how she worded herself. Misao didn't want to wake up in the morning and read about how he jumped off a building because he was such a terrible sex partner. She could see the headline now, "Teenager Finally Loses It When Discovers Lack of Sex Expertise." Misao cringed at the thought.

"Really?! So you'll help me out?" Yahiko asked excitedly, "That is so great! 'Cause there's this girl coming to see me in about a month and she's probably gonna wanna ahem you know... and I'm kinda trying to prepare for it."

"Okay, well, go to my house in a week, band camp will be over by then and then I can give you lessons or something!" Misao said, "We can go figure out how you're gonna knock the socks off that girl! Actually, no, if you're having sex you probably already have your socks off... Oh never mind! I'll talk to you in a week!" 

Misao waved as she ran off to the stadium again, Yahiko waving at her back as she disappeared into the blind spot of the forest to continue her performance. Misao jogged back over to the camp site, her hair bouncing at every step she took. She smiled openly to herself at the idea of teaching Yahiko how to be a raging sex machine. It wasn't going to be easy, but she would try her best.  
  


A/N: So how was it? Did it suck ass? Haha! Okay, well lemme know. Click that button and gimme a review so I can update some more. Next chapter, "Overly Excited" featuring... bum bum bum! The lesbians! gasps No really, I didn't go into that much detail... I swear!


	5. Overly Excited

Disclaimer: I own nothing... honestly... I don't think I even have insurance!

  
  


Chapter 4:

"Overly Excited"

  
  


"Okay, guys, it looks like the best paying job so far that we could find on such short notice is repairing a house," Kenshin concluded, checking off numerous job applications in the local newspaper with his highlighter, "I think it's perfect. It's a few streets down from the beach house so we don't have to worry about transportation, and it's decent pay, that it is."

"So, let's drop by and tell them we're up for it!" Yahiko exclaimed, quickly snatching the newspaper from Kenshin's grasp, surprising Kenshin and giving him a long paper cut across his palm.

"Oro?!" Kenshin yelped, grabbing for his hand like it was chopped off and Saito rolled his eyes, obviously not amused.

"No wonder you can't get a girl, you cry at everything," Saito muttered. Now Kenshin was very tempted to remind Saito of just who he had gotten together with at his prom party, but he changed his mind when he saw Saito reaching for the pack of cigarettes that he had taken the liberty of throwing away. Of course, he had made sure Saito wasn't looking when he did though because otherwise, Kenshin would've been missing more than a few limbs by now. 

Discovering his cigarettes had somehow disappeared, Saito's golden eyes immediately lost their redemption and widened as round as a dinner plate. 

"Where the hell are my cigarettes?! They couldn't have just gotten up and walked outta my damn pocket, now where they hell did they go?! Damn it! Now we really need some money! If I don't get a smoke, I'll go crazy!" Saito then started pacing around in frantic circles, Kenshin, Yahiko, and Sanosuke watching the strange display with amused smiles, Saito's missing cigarettes resting peacefully in the bottom of the trash can nearby. The whole time, Saito began rambling about his complete and total need and dependance of nicotine, his arms flailing about like he was a wild man and suddenly, the situation wasn't as humorous anymore.

"Maybe you should get a nicotine patch, Saito," Kenshin suggested thoughtfully, only to be pushed against the wall by Saito's furious glare, "Oro?!"

"Nicotine patch?! Nicotine patch?! Are you fucking crazy?! I need cigarettes! Do you need me to spell it out for you?!" Saito shouted and all three men backed away from the raging addict, "What are you all still standing here for?! Let's just go to the house and apply for the job...!" 

Saito rolled his eyes again, trying to save face for his vulnerability for smoking and he hurried along the sidewalk towards the street of the house they were supposed to repair. Sanosuke shrugged his shoulders, figuring it was some kind of addiction problem, and Yahiko pointed his index finger at the side of his head, swirling it around to indicate that Saito was indeed a lunatic, but they followed him anyway.

They trudged along after him, making sure that there was a good three feet between them and Saito, just to make sure that their lives weren't in danger anymore. Not that Saito was complaining or anything; he preferred his own company rather than talking with the usual group of morons that he was now stuck with for the next three months. Just how long would he last until he started flipping out? (A/N: I've got my money on two hours!)

Yahiko spotted the house in front of them first, the windows were broken, the paint was chipping, and the porch roof was practically toppling over. The four stood in silence in front of the house they were hired to repair, now suddenly reconsidering if they should take up the work that would definitely take more effort than they had first thought. Yahiko however, pointed and laughed at it.

"Hahahahahhah! Hey, Kenshin! Take a look at that dump! Hahahaha!" Yahiko shouted as he pointed and laughed at the ugly house in serious need of a makeover, "Who'd wanna live in a shit hole like that?!"

"Well, I do," a girl said from behind them. Along with her agitated voice, her foot tapping against the sidewalk's concrete and her arms folded across her chest, the guys could tell that what Yahiko had just said didn't exactly put him on the girl's favorite persons list. "Me and my friend are actually going to pay somebody to fix it so you won't be complaining for long," she continued, flipping her long green hair over her shoulder.

"Ah... H..hhhhottttt....." Yahiko breathed as he looked the girl up and down, definitely noticing the shortness of her skirt and her low cut top, but seemingly unaware of her rising anger, "Whoa! Those are some huge tits you have!" Without morals, Yahiko eyeballed her prodigious cleavage line, drool dripping from his mouth as he continued to gawk at the green haired woman's um... assets. Saito was positive they were fake. 

Sanosuke kept his attention on anything but the girl's breasts; the sky, the ground, a paper bag on the floor... Realizing their money offering was at risk, Kenshin quickly clamped his hand over Yahiko's mouth, wincing at the drool on his palm that had dripped from Yahiko's lips and he mouthed a silent, "EW!" Still, he managed to give the girl an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry, Miss, that I am. You'll have to excuse him, he's uh... a little drunk right now. Yeah! That's it!" Kenshin lied, his violet eyes darting back and forth as the girl frowned, not in any mood for his lies. Looking at Sanosuke and Saito for help, Kenshin stuttered, "Uh... you two say things now!"

"Who, me?!" Sanosuke asked, pointing at himself in shock, but quickly recovered when he realized that the girl's attention had turned to him. Sano made sure that he made a mental note to kill Kenshin later for saving his ass yet again from embarrassment. "Uh... so you're the person that put that ad in the paper, huh?" Sanosuke asked stupidly, pushing away the nervous feeling he had that he would mess up their chance at their job, "That was a nice ad you put up. Really pretty! Yeah, uh... I liked the little star borders and all... Eheheh..." The girl didn't look in the least amused. "ANYWAYS, we were actually thinking of taking up that job, that is, if you want to hire us. Yahiko here's a jerk, but I'm sure he won't bug you or your friend anymore!"

"Hey! I resent that!" Yahiko shouted, finally able to break away from Kenshin's gag on his mouth, but Kenshin clamped his mouth shut again, "I'll have you know...! Mmmmffmfmfmfmf!" His voice came out muffled and inaudible as Sanosuke, Saito, and Kenshin gave the girl innocent smiles, all three of their hands covering Yahiko's mouth that didn't seem to want to shut by itself.

"Well...alright," she said, finally giving up, her hands going down from where she had placed them on her hips, "Come on then. You think you guys could get started today?" The girl began walking towards the house, keys in hand, but the guys were not up to date with what she was saying, they were mostly concentrating on the way her butt moved when she walked. Turning around, the girl frowned at them. 

"Are you guys coming or what?" she asked again, snapping them out of their trance and they all ran over to catch up with her, barely missing her complaint of perverted teenagers that she had mumbled under her breath, "Okay, well, I'm Shura and I'll introduce you to my roommate when we get there. She's already at home, or maybe I should say, she's at the 'dump.'" Shura made sure she shot Yahiko a look at the word, 'dump' as she unlocked the door to the house and walked inside.

They all followed her into the house, Kenshin's hand still covering Yahiko's mouth, and Sanosuke and Saito shushed him from his constant kicking and muffled protests. So far so good. But Yahiko had enough of his mistreatment for one day and he bit down on Kenshin hand, sending the red head screeching at the top of his lungs, a distorted, "ORO?!" 

Also fed up, Saito whirled around, grabbing Yahiko by his collar and pushed him against the wall, his eyes narrowing at the smaller man. He didn't need to say a thing for Yahiko to know what Saito intended to do if he even heard another sound from him and he knew better than to mess with him when he was angry. Yahiko put his hands up in surrender and Saito lowered him back down to the ground before following Shura to the garage for their work supplies. As soon as his back was turned though, Yahiko made it a point to imitate him, contorting his face up so that it was really long and he pulled back his eyelids to make them narrow like Saito's. Sanosuke and Kenshin gave him confused glances, but laughed when Yahiko brought his hand up to his mouth in a fist as if holding onto a bottle and he made numerous 'glug glug' sounds.

Sanosuke and Kenshin shook their head in disapproval at Yahiko's misconduct even though it was pretty funny, and he shot them a what-did-I-do-look. Sighing, Sanosuke pushed him into the garage with a hard shove, causing Yahiko to stumble over, almost toppling face first on the floor. On instinct, Yahiko grabbed for the first thing that was closest to him, and what he grabbed happened to be a person. Startled, he lifted his face up, only to come face to face with a girl he once knew from last year that left suddenly to never come back again.

"YUMI?!" Yahiko exclaimed, backing away from her, scared, as if he had just seen a ghost, or maybe we should say, a former love interest. Yumi seemed to be in the same exact state as Yahiko was as she backed off as well.

"Oh my God! It's YOU!" Yumi cried in disgust. Not exactly the best thing Yahiko wanted to hear at the moment of their strange reunion and he frowned. "Shura! He's the guy you hired to repair the house?! What'd you hire him for?!"

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean?!" Yahiko snapped, deeply offended by the way Yumi was so suddenly bashing him down without even so much as a simple , 'How've you been?' greeting, "Well, Yumi, I missed you too! Nice to know you remember me..." 

"Yumi, these are the only guys that actually want to take up the job, so just ignore your ex okay?" Shura suggested, trying to calm down her outraged friend, "We can just keep you two out of each other's way. He can... he can work out on the balcony railing, that way you won't have to see him! Does that sound okay?"

"First off, that guy is not my ex-boyfriend! I would never go out with a dork like him!" Yumi protested, pointing a finger at Yahiko as if to sentence him to the electric chair, "He made me move out of Tokyo!"

"Oh, you wouldn't go out with him, but you'd screw him, huh? That's interesting," Saito said with a smirk referring to the past incident of their internet escapade, only making Yumi's rage increase and steam began to fume from her ears as she glared at him, wishing all the while that his hair would catch on fire.

"Shut up, Hajime! I didn't ask you!" Yumi shouted, her voice barely touching the surface of Saito's idea of being worthy enough to listen to and he only rolled his eyes and turned away. This only made Yumi shake with anger, her fists tightening into balls and she shook them at him. "I should just...!"

"Look, everybody just calm down," Kenshin soothed, putting his hands up like a peace offering, "Yumi, we will try our best to keep Yahiko out of your sight. Yahiko, stop talking back to these ladies, we need this job! Saito, mind your own business! Sanosuke, uh... never mind.... Everyone, just please calm down. I'm sure we can settle this and still get what we want, that we can."

"Fine," Yumi scoffed, turning away from Yahiko with a big huff, "you can go work on the balcony, that way I won't have to see you."

"Fine with me," Yahiko grumbled, his head down and he kicked up some dust on the floor of the garage in frustration. 

"Okay, well, you boys can get started then," Shura said with a satisfied grin, "the paint stuff and tools are over there. It was uh... nice meeting all of you. Come on, Yumi." Shura then took Yumi by the arm and they both left the garage open, leaving the men behind to begin working on the house. They watched the girls leave, paying most attention to their behinds that sort of compensated for their attitudes. 

Until they slammed the door to the garage shut in their faces, everyone remained silent, but after a few moments, an evil grin passed over Saito's face as he turned back around from the closed door and picked up a heavy plank for the repairing of the porch.

"I think they're lesbians," he said under his breath, really to no one in particular, but he knew exactly whose attention he caught. Bringing the wood outside and placing it on the table to measure, he saw Yahiko's ears perk up at the word "lesbians" and he slowly turned back around to face Saito with curious eyes.

"How can you tell?" Yahiko asked. He had no clue where Saito got the idea that Yumi and Shura were lesbians, but the thought definitely intrigued him. After all, what guy didn't have the fantasy of one day having a threesome? Yahiko was definitely one of those guys. He'd been waiting for one ever since he hit puberty, which actually wasn't all that long ago.

"First, they were holding hands. Second, that Shura girl made sure that Yumi was in no discomfort whatsoever with you. Third, Yumi made it clear to Shura that you and her did not go out and fourth..." Saito didn't get to finish.

"Saito, friends can hold hands and still be straight, that they can," Kenshin replied, stating matter-of-factly that the girls were probably as straight as any of them. If Saito wanted to think they were lesbians just because of a little hand clasping, then he was just jumping to conclusions. Although, Kenshin did happen to like the idea of two girls getting together (and let's not forget about his obsession with bikinis.)

"Shut up, Shit-Break. I don't wanna hear about you and your boyfriends," Saito said with a scowl and he continued talking with Yahiko as Kenshin and Sanosuke started bringing all the supplies out that they would need, "Yahiko, you can't honestly tell me that you never thought of the possibility of Yumi being a lesbian.. Dude, all chicks are border line bisexuals, only a few of them actually go full blown lesbo. Didn't college teach you anything?!"

Yahiko took all this into consideration. It's not that he found it completely absurd if Yumi was a lesbian, in fact, he wouldn't be in the least bit surprised, but seeing her all of a sudden out of nowhere and then finding out she had moved to the other side of the road (if you catch my drift); it was all too much to consider. 

'Dude, if they really are lesbians, they'll be like doing stuff together... and I'll be right outside their window! I hit the jackpot, baby! I got two potential lesbians in a house that I'll be working on the upstairs in, their room right next to the window I'll be by... The possibilities of seeing them hooking up are good to go!' Yahiko thought excitedly, 'Whoa! Pleasure overload!'

"Well, I better get started watching... I mean! Painting! Gotta go paint! On that balcony by their room," Yahiko corrected, his intentions of what he was really going to do so painfully obvious as he headed up the ladder to the balcony, totally forgetting some very important factors of his job.

"Hey Yahiko!" Sanosuke called from the lawn just as Yahiko reached the top of the ladder, "Aren't you forgetting something?!" Sanosuke held up the paintbrush and bucket of paint in his hands and Yahiko blushed at his lack of attention, climbing back down with a sheepish grin on his face. "Paint more, watch less, Little man," Sanosuke said, handing the supplies to Yahiko with a big smirk on his face.

"Don't call me little!" Yahiko protested, snatching the brush and paint from Sano's hands and he turned back to the ladder and climbed back up to start "painting" the railing. Distracted, Yahiko dipped the brush into the white paint, not really paying attention to what he was actually painting as he looked in the window to one of their rooms, the paint brush not even touching an inch of the wall as he unconsciously waved it back and forth. The girls were talking in the doorway, completely unaware that Yahiko was outside, anxiously waiting for them to do something by their window and he watched them as they both left the room. He excitedly fumbled for the walkie talkie on his belt and brought it up to his mouth to whisper down to his friends on the lower level.

"Potential lesbians on the move," Yahiko whispered into the walkie talkie, making Sano, Saito, and Kenshin turn their attention to the front door to see Yumi and Shura stepping out at the same moment and they walked past them to their car.

"Have fun fixing the house, boys," Shura called over her shoulder as she and Yumi drove off down the road to get themselves a drink from the local coffee pub a couple blocks down.

As soon as they were out of sight, Yahiko beeped them all again, speaking into the monitor, "I'm going in." and they all heard him softly humming the Mission Impossible theme song in the background. Sanosuke, Kenshin, and Saito whirled around just in time to see Yahiko duck into the window of one of the girls' rooms.

"Shit! Get in there and get him out!" Sanosuke hissed, pushing Saito and Kenshin to the ladder Yahiko had climbed before and they hurried up to go after their crazed friend. The idea of strangling him to death seemed very appeasing in both their minds as they got inside the room and they made sure to be very careful to not move or touch anything. If the girls were to come back, they didn't want them to notice any difference in the house. And judging by Yumi and Shura's attitudes from earlier, the consequences of getting caught could be fatal. 

Their job was to get Yahiko out as soon as possible, undetected, and moving things around would only make the girls suspicious, but Saito and Kenshin's idea of keeping everything in it's place all crumbled to the floor when Yahiko ran back into the room, waving an object about in the air with a big grin on his face.

"Dudes! Lookie what I found! They got a dildo!" Yahiko shouted and before Saito or Kenshin had time to react, he dashed out of the room, running around the house, screaming at the top of his lungs, "Dildo! Dildo! Dildo! Lesbians! Lesbians! Lesbians!"

"Yahiko!" Kenshin hissed, chasing after him through the house as the spiky haired man continued running around, chanting the words, "dildo and lesbians," like they were the only two words he knew, "Yahiko! You need to put that back right now, that you do!"

"You moron! You weren't supposed to touch anything!" Saito shouted, grabbing Yahiko by the back of his neck and he snatched the rubber dick out of his hands, "Now where the hell did you find this?! We need to put this back before the girls come back or...!" The walkie talkie at his side began to crackle and fizz before it finally came out in a voice.

"Oh, my god! Guys, get the fuck outta there right now! They just came back! Get your asses outta there!" Sanosuke shouted into the walkie talkie, making all three men's faces grow white with fear.

"Stall them!" Saito shouted back, desperate. 

"Got it!" Sanosuke nodded, jogging over to the girls that had just arrived, hoping that his way with words would buy them all some time to get out.

"Hey, uh... where do you ladies want us to start working first?" Sanosuke asked, nervous sweat rolling down the side of his face as he tried to make innocent conversation to stall them, but the girls only walked past him.

"Anywhere is fine," Yumi said over her shoulder with the wave of her hand as they both entered the house, leaving Sanosuke at a loss for words. He stood still for a moment, letting the scenario sink in until he finally realized his plan didn't work and he frantically snatched up the walkie talkie again to warn his friends.

"You guys need to get out right now, I mean it! They're inside the house!" Sanosuke yelled, a little more than panicked, "Get out that window NOW or you'll be dead meat!"

"Aw, fucking A!" Saito shouted and all three ran back up the stairs, heading over to the rooms to put back the dildo wherever Yahiko had found it and try to escape undetected, "Yahiko, where'd you find that fucking thing?!" Yahiko searched frantically around the room, rotating his body a full 360 degrees and more but nothing seemed to be familiar to him.

"I don't know! I was too excited about finding it, I wasn't really paying attention!" he whimpered and Saito smacked Yahiko on the forehead with his palm, Kenshin's face growing gravely pale as they heard the footsteps of the girls heading up the stairs. 

"Hide!" Yahiko whispered and they all dived for the closet at the same time, creating a huge thunking sound as they all hit the floor, one man on top of the other, Yahiko being the one at the bottom of the dog pile.

"Get off me, you moron!"

"ORO?!"

"You guys are too damn heavy!" 

The only thing Saito, Kenshin, and Yahiko could do was stare helplessly from their heap on the floor as the door opened up and in walked Shura and Yumi with coffee mugs in their hands. At the sight before them on the floor, the girls gasped and Yumi accidently lost her grip on her coffee cup, sending it flying over to the men's direction, the cap flying off and the scorching hot mocha chino splashing on the guys' exposed skin.

The men burst out into a fit of screams as the coffee bubbled on their skin, burning them to a bad degree and the girls began to scream as well just because it fit the situation. The entire house rumbled with bellowing cries and shouts, and from outside, Sanosuke became extremely concerned for his friends' safety. 'Oh my God! They're killing them!' Sanosuke thought, climbing up the window to look in on them, only to find the girls screeching on one end of the room and the guys running about in circles on the other, all the while waving their hands around in the air and screaming for 911. More confused than ever, Sanosuke pushed the button of the walkie talkie to ask them what was going on.

"Hey, guys, it's me. What's going on in there?" Sanosuke asked into the speaker, placing the piece to his ear to listen for their response, "Hello? Can you guys hear me? What's happening in there?! Guys?!" 

Shura frowned at the voice on the walkie talkie and she quickly grabbed it off of Yahiko's belt buckle and whispered back to the soul surviving friend that had stayed downstairs. Yahiko was in too much shock of how close she came to his crotch when getting the little phone that he barely had time to snatch it back before she said anything.

"So you wanna see what's gonna happen to your little buddies here?" Shura asked, a sly smirk heard in the throaty tone of her voice and she didn't even wait for his response before she continued, "It seems to me like they snuck in here and now me and Yumi are going to make them our little slaves."

In the background, Sanosuke could hear Kenshin shouting an overly loud, "ORO?!" at the word 'slaves' and he heard Saito and Yahiko protesting to the idea with a series of, "are-you-crazy's" and "what-the-hell's." Instantly, Sanosuke felt sorry for them, remembering Yumi very strange antics of foreplay. And if she still thought like she did last year, she'd be having all three of them stripping down and humping chairs in not time. Sano cringed at the thought of them all in their boxers doing little happy dances around the room. He could practically feel the humiliation coming on already and he could only smile at the hilarious time when Yahiko had to go through with the mortifying and extremely strange amusement that Yumi preferred that he do.

"Yes, they are now our slaves, to do as we please, no questions asked or else we'll call the police and report to them about four perverted teenage guys that trespassed into our home,"Yumi said, her idea twisted and cruel, but futile. The guys knew that they had no choice but to play along with whatever crude favor that the girls wanted them to do and if that meant stripping down into their underpants and pulling up chairs, they would just have to do it. "Now, do you all agree with the rules and circumstances? You do whatever we want and we won't call the cops on you. Deal?"

Saito and Kenshin exchanged looks, nodding in agreement to the rules. They didn't bother asking Yahiko because, according to them, he would only get the girls to press more charges against them, therefore giving them more power than they already had, and Saito and Kenshin did not like being controlled. Saito opened his mouth to say that they should just get it over with, but he was cut off by Yahiko's new found suggestion.

"Yeah, we can do that, OR we can add a little something extra in as well," Yahiko said, his hand going up as he explained his theory. Yumi and Shura nodded and motioned for him to go on and he cleared his throat despite the angry glares he received from Kenshin and Saito on the side lines. "Well, we'll do whatever you girls want and you won't call the cops on us. But if we do one thing for you, then you two have to do something for us. What do you say?"

"Hm... What do you think Shura?" Yumi asked, turning to her friend, rather liking the idea of give-a-little-get-a-little, but she turned to her friend to settle on the decision, "You think it's a good idea?"

"It's only fair," Shura replied with a shrug and she looked at Kenshin and Saito, "Are you boys up for it as well?" 

"I don't think that...! Mmmfffmfmfmfmmfmfmmfm!" Kenshin started to disagree but Saito quickly covered his mouth with his hand, stopping him from canceling the sweet deal that Yahiko was able to conjure up just in the nick of time. Saito smiled sweetly at the girls and nodded his head in response, forcing Kenshin to nod his head too as he pushed down on the rurouni's skull in a slight nod, answering for him.

"Alright! This outta be fun!" Yahiko exclaimed, eyeing the girls as if they were a buffet line and he hadn't eaten in weeks. Licking his chops, Yahiko rubbed his hands together and prepared to dig into the big dish when Shura pushed him back with her palm face up.

"Nope, I don't think so," Shura said, shaking her finger in his face and she pointed at him instead, "you have to go first, remember? That was the deal. You guys go, then we go."

"Yeah! Now, Yahiko, we want you to grab Kenshin's ass!" Yumi said excitedly, pointing at a startled Yahiko to Kenshin, who looked about ready to faint at any given second. Saito's idea of how fun this was going to be suddenly hit rock bottom at what "favors" these girls actually had in mind. If the entire deal was going to be like this, Saito wanted to know just when exactly it was going to end.

"Ooh, yeah! Good idea, Yumi!" Shura agreed, clasping her hands together in delight, "Okay, so do it! You go, we go! Come on, it's not that hard!"

  
  


'What the hell?!' Sanosuke thought, looking in from the window again as he held the walkie talkie up to his ear to hear their conversation, but he barely caught any of it. He peered into the glass screen, watching as Yahiko and Kenshin stared wide-eyed and open-mouthed at Yumi and Shura; Saito looked about ready to burst out laughing. 'Dude, I am so glad I'm not in there right now...' Sanosuke thought as he continued spying through the window and he stared in disbelief as Kenshin lowered down the side of his pants, 'What the hell is he doing?!'

"Just hurry up and do it!" Kenshin said, shutting his eyes so tight it actually hurt and he cringed at the awaited impact of Yahiko's hand on his butt cheek, trying his best to take his mind off the situation at hand and he thought about every possible perverted thing he could to prove that he was still straight. 

'Alright, I'm still straight if I do this... I am... I'm still straight... Just think about non-bisexual things, non-bisexual things, uh... bikinis, boobies, condoms, um... pool tables, Kaoru on a pool table... in a bikini, porn... Ah! Make that straight porn! Straight porn! Girls in porn, um... Baywatch, the entire girl's volleyball team... Oh god, when is this going to be over?!' Kenshin thought, his face contorting into a twisted expression as the sound of hand against cheek sounded throughout his ears and Kenshin shouted out what seemed to be the tenth "Oro" of the day.

"Okay, I'm touching his ass, I'm touching his ass, I'm touching his ass..." Yahiko chanted as he tried not to look at what he was doing and concentrate on the big reward they would all get to see in return for the humiliation. 

Saito lurched forward and he put his hands to the bottom of his throat to keep from vomiting as he turned away from the less than beautiful scene taking place in front of him. Yumi and Shura seemed to be enjoying their embarrassment more than the actual thing that they were doing and they smiled in satisfaction, holding out as long as they could before finally allowing him to let go.

Yahiko and Kenshin breathed a sigh of relief and Yahiko instantly yanked his hand away, creating a huge smacking sound from the tight hold and Kenshin immediately pulling up the side of his pants up to his waist and buckled it once more, giving Yahiko and Saito a warning look that read, "You tell anyone about this and that'll be the last thing you ever say!" 

Sanosuke on the ladder, shuddered at the display that had (Thank God!) just ended and he turned his attention to the two girls in the room, eagerly anticipating the upcoming ass grabbing. He thanked his lucky stars that Megumi wasn't there at the moment to hit him over the head so he was free to enjoy the action.

"Alright, we did ours. Now you do yours," Yahiko said, gesturing them to get a move on and the girls both turned to each other with wide grins on their faces. Saito and Kenshin nodded and stepped back to watch them at a different angle that was a little more appreciative than from where they were originally standing.

Yumi slid her hand up Shura's thigh, doing it like she was some kind of expert (kinda makes you wonder...has she done this before?), reaching up the short skirt she wore and she grabbed her butt in her palm. Saito, Kenshin, Yahiko, and Sanosuke all watched with wide eyes, the whole ass grabbing embargo making them both excited and dwelling the next minute where they would have their turn again. Finally, slowly tracing her hand back down, Yumi and Shura both excitedly turned to the three guys again, not even aware of Sanosuke's presence in their window, and they suggested their new idea.

"Okay, now your turn!" Yumi said enthusiastically, jumping up and down with eager anticipation, "Hajime, you kiss Yahiko!"

"HELL NO!!!!!!" Saito shouted, his nostrils flaring at the very thought of kissing a member of the same sex both appalling and disgusting him at the same time, "I'm straight, god damn it! And don't call me Hajime! There's no way in hell, I'm kissing him!"

"Hey! I'm not a bad looking guy, you know!" Yahiko protested, deeply offended by the insult Saito threw at him, "I'll have you know, I'm one hella fucking good kisser too! Come on, Saito, take one for the team! If we do that, then just imagine what THEY'LL do!"

"Yeah, come on, Hajime!" Yumi pleaded, ignoring the fact that he had just told her not to call him by his first name and Shura joining in with the puppy-dog eyes and they both batted their eyelashes at him, "If you two do that, we'll do anything you guys want."

"Anything?" Saito asked, raising an eyebrow in uncertainty. He wasn't about to get ripped off by a couple of psycho lesbians with weird pleasure needs for nothing and he was going to make sure that they kept their word. If there was ever a reason for him to actually kiss another male, it had better be worth it.

"Anything," Yumi and Shura repeated, putting their hands up in a scout's honor to seal the promise and Saito rolled his eyes.

"Fine, you two better like it," Saito grumbled and he turned to Yahiko with a disgusted face, "Okay, I better not catch you smiling."

"Believe me, I won't be," Yahiko reassured him with another frown.

"Okay, ready? One, two, three..." Quickly, Saito and Yahiko smacked lips and pulled apart all in the same second, wiping their mouths off of any traces of the foul taste of another man's lips.

"What?! That didn't even count!" Shura protested, pointing angrily at the two, "That wasn't even a kiss! You probably kiss your own mother with more passion than that!"

"Yeah! That so does not count!" Yumi said, crossing her arms over chest in disapproval, "Now you have to do it again! With tongues!"

"WHAT?!!!!!!!!!!" Saito and Yahiko exclaimed, their eyes bulging out of their sockets at the word, 'tongues' and 'again.' There was absolutely no way in Hell they were about to do that again, no matter what the girls promised they'd do. 

By now, Sanosuke had already left his place at the window to go throw up in the bushes in the front lawn, throwing away the walkie talkie in the trash can outside so that he could get as far away from hearing or seeing whatever crazy and wacky things they were all doing in there. Whatever it was, Sanosuke was definitely not up for watching another second.

Kenshin only backed away even farther from the four people in front of him. His fear that he would be next rose up the hairs on the back of his neck to stand on end and caused his veins to pulsate under his skin. He wished with all his might that it was all just a dream, a very very very bad dream and he hit himself across the face to wake himself up, but the scenery still remained the same and he did not wake up in his bed safe and sound. He just couldn't take it anymore! More than just frightened, Kenshin fled from the room, running like a bolt of lightning streaking across the sky as he dashed out of the house. He didn't stop running until he was a good hundred yards away from the front yard and as he ran, Kenshin screamed at the top of his lungs, "Orororororo!"

"How about Yahiko just give me a handjob instead?" Saito suggested after they had all snapped out of their concentration on Kenshin's disappearing act. 

Yahiko's jaw hit the floor at the mention of a handjob and his name in the same sentence, the idea not in the least bit better than the other option, in fact, Yahiko would have much rather preferred to just have kissed him instead.

"Alright! Go Yahiko! This ought to be good!" Shura cheered and Yumi gave Yahiko a slight smile as the girls waited for him to do his dirty work. And the word dirty was just the perfect description because the thought of going anywhere near whatever Saito had in his pants was enough to make his flesh crawl.

"Be a team player, Yahiko," Saito encouraged, "just think about what they'll do after this! They'll be screwing each other in no time!"

Yahiko looked from one expectant face to another, his complexion as pale as the remaining white paint on the walls. If he hadn't been wearing any clothes, he would have disappeared into them. Finally, he made his decision, bolting from the room so fast, it would have made Superman glow with envy.

"Get that thing away from me, Saito!" Yahiko screamed, the taller man following close at his heels, still trying to pull his pants back up as he yelled at Yahiko's 'stupidity.' "Put the snake back in the hole right now or I swear I'll wack it off with a chainsaw!" Yahiko warned, running in the same direction that Kenshin had gone, only this time, running for the sake of his hand's sanitary condition.

"Get back here, you pussy! Just take it like a man! Do you know what those girls were capable of doing after this?! You fucking messed it all up, you moron!!!" Saito screamed, tripping over his pants that were still trying to make their way around his waist as he desperately tried to pull them back up and chase after the shorter man at the same time, "You fucking loser! Just be a man and give me a goddamn handjob!!!!!"

  
  


A/N: Did I have you worried there for a second? Okay, just for future reference, this is not, I repeat, NOT, a yaoi! Hahaha! This happened in the movie, but of course, I changed it around a little bit so it fit more into my style of writing which hopefully is good. Sorry if this chapter was a little too much for anyone, but you know, leave your comments for me and I'll check it out. Next chapter, Sano and Megumi have a little "interesting" chat over the phone and Yahiko heads over to Misao's for his first lesson in training to become a sex expert! Don't miss it! 


	6. Gotta Hear It To Believe It

Disclaimer: If I did own RK or American Pie, don't you think I'd have a lot more money by now?

  
  


Chapter 5:

"Gotta Hear It To Believe It"

  
  


"So let me get this straight," Sanosuke said, leaning forward in his chair to listen to Yahiko's side of the story, even though he didn't quite believe it, "Saito wanted to give you a handjob?"

"No! He wanted me to give him one!" Yahiko corrected. For a moment the room was completely silent, crickets could be heard outside, that is, until Sanosuke and Kenshin burst out laughing.

"You're such a shitty liar, Yahiko!" Sanosuke said, slapping his knee as Kenshin fell from his chair, laughing like a maniac straight out of the nut house.

"What? I'm serious! I ran outta there so fast! It wasn't even funny! Hey, stop laughing already!" Yahiko shouted in frustration, "He really did want me to give him a handjob! If you ask him, he'll deny it, but I'm telling the truth! Quit laughing at me!"

But Sanosuke and Kenshin didn't stop laughing, not for a long while and Yahiko only sunk lower into his chair, frustrated and fuming. He clenched the chair's arm, digging his nails into the material and leaving deep indents on the fabric. Luckily, the tension was simmered down when the phone rang in the kitchen. Sanosuke got up from his place on the floor to go answer it, stumbling over more than a few times as he tried to get over to the phone and hold his stomach at the same time.

"Hello?" Sanosuke answered the phone, a huge grin still on his face as he tried to contain himself from cracking up all over again. If he wasn't able to regain his composure, the person on the other line would probably think he was some type of serious mental case and Sanosuke did not want that, especially if the person on the other end was who he was hoping it was.

"Sano?" Megumi asked on the other line, holding the receiver close to her face to listen for his voice again, "Is that you?" Bingo. Sanosuke just one a million dollars for the lucky guess!

"Oh, hey! Look, can you hang on a sec, I'm gonna pick up the phone upstairs, alright?" Sanosuke said and after Megumi agreed to hold on, he turned to his friends in the living room, "Hey, can you guys hang up the phone when I tell you I got it upstairs?"

"Sure thing, Sano," Kenshin replied, finally calm after his non-stop laughing session. Yahiko was still too upset by his friends' teasing to speak up and he watched Sanosuke head up the stairs and holler back down that he had the phone in his room. 

Turning to Yahiko, Kenshin excused himself to go to the bathroom and reminded him to hang up the phone so Sanosuke and Megumi could talk in private before he closed the door to the downstairs toilet room. 

Kenshin wanted to catch up on his Tantra exercises and he found that now would be a good opportunity since Yahiko didn't seem to be in the best mood to chat. Opening the book up to the saved page, Kenshin took on the directions, moving about the bathroom in all the motions indicated, even though he looked completely ridiculous doing it.

  
  


Yahiko got up from his seat, grumbling all the while about some know-it-all friends of his that should get run over by a couple mack trucks as he went over to the phone to hang it up. He sighed, and while picking it up, Yahiko was able to catch a tiny sentence of what the two were saying, something about what she was doing in America right now. Losing interest almost immediately, Yahiko rolled his eyes at the lack of excitement in their conversation. He was about to put the phone back on the receiver when he heard the next line that both shocked and excited him.

"Hey, Sano, what would you say if I told I was touching myself right now?" Megumi asked on the other line, a mischievous grin on her face as she secretly hinted for her boyfriend to play along.

"WHOAHOHO! This conversation just did a total one-eighty!" Sanosuke said, surprised at the unexpected comment from his girlfriend, "Where did that come from?"

"Just play along, Rooster-Head. Come on. It's fun!" Megumi urged on. After all, phone sex is only fun if there's a second party going on at the other end of the line. One person phone sex is not phone sex at all.

"Okay...Well, what am I supposed to say?" Sanosuke asked, still feeling awkward about talking to his girlfriend on the phone about her touching herself, even if he kinda did like the idea. Kind of brings up some good pictures in the imagination.

"Just tell me what you're doing," Megumi said, getting a little impatient at his slowness to react, "It's just like dirty talking, which I know you're good at. It's just a little... different 'cause I'm not there. Just think about what we would be doing if I was over there right now."

"Is this supposed to give me a hard-on 'cause it's working!" Sanosuke exclaimed, now feeling a bit more confident that he could handle the situation.

"Good! Now grab it and tell me how big it is," Megumi murmured softly, completely unaware of one extra listener on the other line.

'Whoa! Dude! They're having phone sex!' Yahiko thought, pressing the receiver to his ear so he could listen to more of their interesting conversation. Smiling widely, Yahiko settled down in his chair, getting more comfortable as he leaned back against the wall and put his feet up on the kitchen counter. If he was going to listen to their conversation, it was most likely gonna take a while and he might as well get comfy. Yahiko tried to psychically tell Sanosuke to ask Megumi what she was wearing, but of course, that didn't seem to work and Yahiko snapped his fingers in dismay. 

'Take off the bra, take off the bra, take off the bra!' Yahiko chanted in his head over and over again, but the signal didn't seem to be reaching either of them. He was starting to get very disappointed at hearing about Sanosuke rubbing his cock and by now, he was just rolling his eyes. 'Come on, get to Megumi's part already!' Yahiko thought, but his thoughts didn't go any farther than the first membrane in his head.

"Oh yeah..." Sanosuke was saying on the phone, leaving Yahiko in a disgusted face at hearing the gorey details.

"Tell me what you want me to do," Megumi whispered seductively into the phone, emphasizing on her voice so it was low and sultry. She only meant for Sanosuke to hear and answer, but Yahiko jumped at the opportunity.

"Yeah, Megumi, take off your bra and tell me my dick isn't as big as Yahiko's," Yahiko said on the other line, trying his best to imitate Sanosuke's deeper voice, but the voice only came out sounding extremely accented like Jean Claude Van Dam or something.

"YAHIKO?!" both Megumi and Sanosuke shouted on their phones so loud, Yahiko had to pull the phone away from his ear from the ringing in his eardrums. After shaking his head a few times to clear out the sirens, he brought the receiver back to his ear.

"Hey, you two love birds! How's the weather in America, Megumi? Is it hot enough for you to take off your bra?" Yahiko asked pleasantly, as if there was absolutely nothing wrong with what he was doing at the moment.

"Yahiko, you little shit! What the hell?! I told you to hang up the phone when I got to my room!" Sanosuke yelled, infuriated at Yahiko's eavesdropping on their private conversation and the suggestive remark that he had actually dared to say to HIS girlfriend, "GET OFF! NOW!"

"Dude, I am gettin' off just listening to you two!" Yahiko said with a smile, "Come on, continue! It was just gettin' good! She was about to do whatever you wanted! You should've told her to lose the bra!"

"Yahiko!!!!!!!" Sanosuke growled, his anger rising up to the point that you could've boiled an omelet on his forehead.

"Aw, come on, guys! Keep going! I was almost there!" Yahiko pleaded, but the angry couple were through putting up with him.

"Nice talking to you, Yahiko," Megumi said sarcastically, rolling her eyes, "Sano, I think we should try this again some other time. I'll talk to you soon."

"Okay, bye," Sanosuke said with a sigh. It wasn't Megumi's fault anyway so there really was no use taking it out on her. As soon as he heard the click on the other end, Sanosuke got up from his chair, hands balled up into fists and he ran down the stairs with fire blazing in his eyes and every intention to beat Yahiko into a pulp. 

"Yahiko, I am gonna KILL you!!!!!!!!!" Sanosuke shouted at the top of his lungs as he spotted the smaller man in the kitchen. Yahiko swore aloud and ran in the opposite direction to get away from the angered Sanosuke, but was caught in a matter of seconds.

"You're not getting away that easy!!!" Sanosuke grabbed Yahiko by his shirt, pulling him backwards and slammed him up against the wall, his feet dangling in the air over two feet off the ground. "Now, how do you think Tsubame would react if I told her that you grabbed Kenshin's ass? Hm? Or maybe I should tell her about the handjob business you had with Saito? I'm sure she'd be absolutely thrilled to sleep with you then!" Sanosuke threatened, his grip on Yahiko's collar never losing it's firm grasp.

"Sano, no! Don't tell her that! Anything, but that!" Yahiko remonstrated, shaking his head vigorously from left to right in constant denial, "Please! Don't tell her about that! That'll ruin my chance with her for sure! Why can't you just beat me up or something?!"

"Okay, that'll work too!" Sanosuke said with a nod and he hit Yahiko over the head with his fist, knocking him out cold and he dropped him on the floor. Still not satisfied with the punishment, Sanosuke picked Yahiko back up and dragged him over to the coat hanger by the door. He latched onto the rim of Yahiko's boxer shorts and made sure he gave it a huge tug before he hung him up on one of the hanger's hooks. 

Smiling in restitution, Sano took a step back to admire his handy work. Completely satisfied, he brushed his hands off of imaginary dust and walked off with a big grin on his face, whistling a happy tune as he went back up the stairs with a casual bounce in his walk.

  
  


Kenshin emerged from the bathroom, finally finished with his meditation tauntring. He had gotten into the sexual restoration process when he got hold of one of the books in the library. It had served to be an interesting way to increase the pleasure in sex, and even though Kenshin wasn't exactly a wild animal in the sack, the book's meditation rituals brought up his raging libido by ten-fold. With enough practice, he was able to reserve ejaculating so that it was stored up inside him until he could release it into one huge orgasm. Completely satisfied with his practice, Kenshin strolled out of the bathroom about half an hour after he had entered and jumped back in surprise at what he saw in the living room.

"ORO?!" Kenshin exclaimed as he ran over to the bruised up Yahiko hanging by his under pants on the coat hanger, "Yahiko, what happened to you?" Kenshin gingerly pulled his friend off the hook, trying his best not to aggravate the major wedgie that Yahiko must be feeling.

"Ow..." Yahiko said, rubbing his head with one hand and picking out his boxers with the other, "I'm okay now.... I think..." Finding the huge lump on the top of his head, Yahiko winced. "Or maybe on second thought, I might need a pack of ice or something... Jesus, I don't think I'll be able to sit for a week!"

"What did you do this time?" Kenshin asked, shaking his head at his friend. He knew Yahiko well enough to know that whenever he was put in a sticky situation like this, he had most definitely pissed someone off. And right now, Kenshin had a feeling it was Sanosuke.

"Why do you always think that I started it?" Yahiko asked, still rubbing his sore butt and he tried to find a comfortable way to stand without bringing himself more uneasiness.

"Because you are always, and I mean, always, the one that starts it, that you are," Kenshin said, not at all sorry for him anymore, in fact, he was about two seconds away from falling over and rolling on the floor with laughter, "How did you anger Sano?"

"How did you know that I pissed off Sano?" Yahiko asked, again getting freaked out by Kenshin's psychic ability. The red head had always had the power to know certain things even before anyone told him about it; it was kinda scary. "Oh, riiiiiight! You're psychic," Yahiko said, "Okay, well, him and Megumi were talking on the phone and I was about to hang it up just like you asked me to, but then I heard what they were talking about!"

"And what were they talking about?" Kenshin asked curiously. Wherever this story was going, Kenshin could already point out that Yahiko was, again, at fault, as usual. He had no right to listen to their conversation and all, but still Kenshin was very interested in the fact that not much really caught Yahiko's attention except for... well, sex. Since Kenshin was a clueless little bastard, he wanted to know what was so intriguing to Yahiko that Sanosuke would sink so low as to hang him up on a coat hanger by his underwear for listening.

"None of your business," Sanosuke snapped as he climbed down the stairs; Yahiko's face turned instantly white as he got closer. "Yahiko, isn't it about time you go see band camp girl?" Sanosuke asked, wanting to change the subject as fast as he could. He had no intention of Kenshin knowing what exactly he and Megumi had been talking about earlier and he would do anything to just get Yahiko out of his sight as quickly as possible before he decided to knock him upside his head again.

"Uh...yeah. That's right!" Yahiko stuttered, suddenly remembering that he was supposed to go to Misao's house, "I gotta go see her then! Aw, but I don't wanna have to take the bus..." Sanosuke gave him a hard look. "Okay, so the bus it is!" Yahiko said, clapping his hands together awkwardly before running out the door.

  
  


Getting to Misao's house so much easier and faster than Yahiko had first thought, but then again, Sanosuke was threatening to choke the life out of him, so running the whole way there was practically necessary. Thankfully, Yahiko made it there in one piece. (Screw the bus. Hello? This is Yahiko! He has no money!) 

Cautiously, he approached the front door, the steps of the porch seemingly taking him way too long to climb up as he dreaded what was on the other side of the door. Something deep within him mustered itself up, a feeling that Yahiko could only describe as nervousness, why he felt it was all a mystery to him and suddenly being caught with his pants down wouldn't have seemed so bad. Anything besides being here now looked to be a brighter part of the world, but Yahiko wasn't somewhere else, he wasn't there or later. He was here and it was now. 

Before he could even ring the doorbell, the door swung open and out stepped Misao with a big smile on her face and she ushered him inside.

Yahiko nodded, silently following her through the tiny house and up the stairs to her room at the very end of the hall. He was torn between wanting to run and hide and staying to just get the whole damn thing over with. As much as he hated to admit it, Yahiko needed Misao to help him. If there was ever any chance he had left with Tsubame, it was on it's way and all hell if Yahiko would let it slip past him for the second time. He was snapped out of his thoughts by Misao's voice as she plopped a large pillow in front of him. 

Perplexed, Yahiko looked from Misao to the pillow in utter confusion and Misao rolled her eyes.

"This pillow of mine is gonna be Tsubame!" Misao announced all too happily and Yahiko watched her as she slipped both arms into her band camp t-shirt. It took only a few brief seconds and a couple of strange movements under her shirt, but she was finally able to pull out her bra without even taking off her top. Yahiko only stared at the display in disbelief, like taking off your bra without taking off your shirt was like making a one hundred ton elephant disappear before your eyes. "Ta da! Now, we put this bra on here and there!" Misao latched the bra around the Tsubame pillow and smiled at her well done work, "Okay, now you have to try and get the bra off!"

"That's easy!" Yahiko exclaimed, puffing his chest out in pride at the simple task, "Even I can do that!" Yahiko turned the pillow around to unhook the clasps when Misao suddenly smacked him on the arm. 

"Ow!" Yahiko shouted, rubbing his reddened bicep, "What's wrong with you?! What the hell was that for?!"

"You can't turn Tsubame around to take off her bra! That'd just ruin the mood right there! Remember, you gotta be smooooooth," Misao explained, dragging the word on as if it had no end and she smiled, snapping her fingers in front of his face as if he were her trained puppy, "Now, try again. This time use only one hand and don't turn her around."

Yahiko put on his best pensive face as he hooked two arms around the pillow and Misao smacked his arm again. Wincing at the slap, Yahiko frowned. He half expected her to throw him against the wall and screw the life out of him like that night after prom, but she didn't seem to be anywhere near that stage. Brushing away the thought of their night together, Yahiko tried again to unhook the bra with only one hand. 

His fingers fell to the clasp, twisting and turning every which way possible, and he strained as he tried to get it off. Not wanting to give up without a fight, he withdrew and tried for a fourth time, this time more determined than ever to get it off, but the clasp seemed to be impossible to open. Yahiko swore aloud and quickly yanked on the bra, ripping the right strap clear off the material and the bra fell off the pillow. 

Raising his arms in the air in triumph Yahiko let out imaginary cheering sounds from the invisible crowd.

"Who's the man?! Yahiko!!!!" he shouted, holding up the mangled bra in the air like a trophy, "And the crowd goes wild! Yahiko has hold of the almighty BRA!!!"

"Okay then......... well, you broke my favorite bra," Misao said awkwardly as she snatched the undergarment away from his grasp. Sighing at it's horrible condition, Misao tossed it in the huge pile of clothes in the corner impeccably labeled as 'Sew up.' "It seems we're going to have to start with something a little um... less complicated," Misao reasoned and she turned to face him, throwing the pillow off to the side, "Alright, let's role play!"

"Hell yeah! Which side of the bed you want?" Yahiko asked excitedly, not at all understanding Misao's real meaning of 'role play' and she laughed at his stupidity.

"No, silly! Not that kind of role play! I meant that we're gonna act, like a play," Misao explained and Yahiko face dropped it's enthusiastic grin for yet another sexual disappointment of the day. "Okay, let's say I'm a hot girl. What do you want to do?" she asked him.

"I wanna touch your tits!" Yahiko exclaimed excitedly, lunging for them without warning, but Misao was able to hit him away before he could even lay a finger on her, "OW! Okay, you and me really need to work on our communication skills! Let's keep it more verbal than abusive here!"

"You can't just jump to second base, Yahiko! You gotta work your way into it first! Like, take me for example. Would I tell an amateur to play at a concert if they've never even seen a flute before?" Yahiko scratched his head, wondering what band camp had to do with him getting laid. Sighing, Misao continued anyway. "No, I wouldn't. You gotta preheat the oven before you stick in the turkey!" Misao said and Yahiko seemed to be even more confused, "Well, let me put this in easier words for you to understand. Um... here, kiss me on my neck." Misao pointed to the base of her throat, indicating what she wanted him to do and Yahiko questioningly pointed at her, only moving closer after she nodded her head. Hesitantly, he placed his mouth on the base of her throat and placed the tiniest of butterfly kisses. 

Misao frowned at his lack of experience and passion that didn't seem to be anywhere in the kiss at all. The kiss was so... blah. Blah. That's all she could describe it as. 'Definitely not gonna win a noble prize for best kisser,' Misao thought as she pushed him away.

"How was that?" Yahiko asked curiously, positive that he had done well, but his ego dropped back down to negative fifteen when she shook her head in disapproval.

"First pointer, less lick, more suck," Misao suggested, then she paused, "Do you want me to write any of this down?" Yahiko opened his mouth to say yes, but Misao cut him off before he could even utter a syllable. "No? Okay then, we'll finish up. Here, practice with uh.... this apple!" Misao said, grabbing the fruit on top of her dresser and she held it up in front of his face, "Try to kiss the apple like it was Tsubame."

"Well, I'm thinking that Tsubame probably doesn't have lips in the shape of an apple," Yahiko pointed out and Misao groaned at his horrible imagination.

"Don't ask, just do!" she barked and Yahiko immediately went to do her bidding, kissing the apple and trying to imagine that instead of the apple's hard skin, it was Tsubame's soft mouth. Again, Misao scowled at what he was doing and using her free hand, she shaped his mouth into a tiny pucker, sort of like a blowfish and brushed the apple against his lips, making him do the same.

"Now, that was much better!" Misao complimented, smiling in satisfaction and she placed the apple down on the bed sheets, "So, you have the kissing part down, now you just need to keep practicing that until I see you next week!"

"Wait, that's it? I mean, lessons are over now?" Yahiko asked, surprised at her rush to usher him out of her house. Truthfully, he wasn't in any mood to return to the beach house only to be beaten 'til his whole body turned black and blue. He wanted to hold out and stay away from Sanosuke as long as possible and hopefully, by the time he got back, Sano would have had some time to blow off some steam and be a little more welcoming to Yahiko's presence.

"Why? Is there something else you wanted to practice for?" Misao asked, sitting back down on the bed, "If there's anything else that I can help you with, you might as well ask me now."

"Well, I...uh... Why don't you tell me about yourself? I mean, I've known you since like... last year, but I don't know all that much about you. What else do you do besides go to band camp?" Yahiko asked, finding something to talk about with her besides her infatuation with toting around her flute, "You never really talk about anything else..."

"Oh... I do the same things you do. Like hang out with friends, go to movies, stuff like that. What do you think I do?" Misao asked. She never realized that Yahiko wanted to know anything about her personal life, so she never mentioned anything besides band camp, which always served to be safe territory when talking with him. Unfortunately, Misao had no idea that talking about band camp was the least thing Yahiko wanted to hear about.

"Don't you like, go to parties and stuff? I don't think I've ever seen you at Saito's house before," Yahiko said, sitting cross legged on the bed as he turned to face his entire body to her.

"It's not that I don't want to go or anything. Believe me, I've tried to get in there, but you know, being in band throughout your entire life doesn't exactly make you the coolest person in school," Misao explained with her head down, "I don't really like Saito anyways..."

"Well, you don't worry about that, nobody likes Saito. They all just suck up to him 'cause he has kick ass parties. Besides, being in band camp doesn't automatically make you a dork or anything," Yahiko replied with a shrug, "I think you're pretty cool."

"Really?" Misao asked, her face lighting up at the mention of her name and the word 'cool' in the same sentence. The fact that the sentence didn't end with a "in your dreams" made it all so much better.

"Yeah," Yahiko agreed and suddenly an idea popped into his head, "Hey, you wanna hear one of my stories? It's a Saito-bashing story."

"Sure!" Misao said excitedly, "Let's hear it!"

"Okay, well, me, Kenshin, Sanosuke and Saito got this job a while ago for repairing this house, right?" Yahiko began, more than eager to share with her the embarrassing moments they had at Yumi and Shura's house only yesterday. 

It was kind of funny how much Yahiko liked to see Misao's mouth curve up into a tiny smile at all the funny parts in the story and how much he enjoyed hearing her laugh out loud when he imitated Saito refusing to kiss him. Yahiko felt that feeling again, the one he got when he had first gotten to her doorstep, the flipflop feeling in the bottom of his stomach that made his heart jump into his throat. If there was anything in the world that could have given the feeling a name, Yahiko was too distracted by the way the sun glinted off her black hair to even give it a second thought.

  
  


A/N: I guess Yahiko's butt isn't so sore anymore, huh? Hehe. Lemme know what you think and give me a request if you want something special done. I won't guarantee anything, but I'll try my best! Come on! Click that little button below!


	7. To Mend the BrokenHearted

Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't know who owns RK or American Pie, but I do know it's not me!

  
  


Chapter 6:

"To Mend The Broken-Hearted"

  
  


Kaoru paced back and forth in the middle of her bedroom as Mina worriedly looked on, squatting low on Kaoru's bed with her eyes transfixed on her friend as she continued rambling on and on about something inaudible to Mina's ears. The rug in the middle of her room practically screamed for help as smoke started to rise from the heavy pacing steps Kaoru took, moving left to right without stopping. Growing very tired of Kaoru's emotional state, Mina grabbed hold of her shoulders to halt her in her steps, shaking her, rattling her brain, and turning her thoughts inside out. Kaoru confusedly turned to face Mina with a what-in-the-world-is-wrong-with-you look for interrupting her thoughts.

"Kaoru, what is going on with you?" Mina asked, concern evident on her face. She had come over so they could catch up on old times, good times only, one that did not including prom night. 

Mina, to this day, still believed that Kenshin slept with her and ditched her sometime during the night and ever since that night, she refused to hear any kind of mention of the red head's name. It was hard enough that Kenshin just couldn't "remember" what happened between the two of them that night, but hearing about him all the time made all the anger rise up again. Little did Mina know that Kenshin had in no way gotten together with her that night and if he had, he surely would not have left her alone like she believed he did.

"I don't know, Mina," Kaoru said, shaking her hands in frantic spasms to try and push away the shaky nervous system of hers that didn't seem to want to work properly, "I think I'm just nervous because I'm gonna see Kenshin again soon and all that... God, I haven't talked to him since prom. I didn't even get to talk to him at the party... I think I'm just scared that he's changed from when I last knew him... I sure hope not."

"I hope he did!" Mina grumbled and Kaoru stared at her in question, "What? Don't give me that look! That guy was a complete jerk! He left me with a god damn broom for God's sakes! All guys are, I never should've thought he'd be any different! Just look at what men do to you! Look at yourself! Kenshin has like... diseased you! You've been Kenshin-ated! If there actually was a disease, I'd be able to tell people that you had a Kenshin! You used to be so... Okay, let me think of a different example person... Megumi! Yeah! She used to be so independent and now look at her! She sticks to her boyfriend like a bad case of velcro!"

"You say that I have a' Kenshin' like he's some kind of wart or something. Mina, we all know you hate all human beings with a penis between their legs, but that doesn't mean that we all have to hate them too," Kaoru reasoned, but really it was no use. Trying to talk sense into Mina was like trying to convince a brick wall to knock itself over. "What do you have against Kenshin anyway? What'd he ever do to you?"

Mina stiffened at the question and she resisted the urge to smack Kaoru for her density to even dare say his name in front of her. She hated, absolutely despised, the man with every part of her body for leaving her like he did. She had found out that he had later gone to Kaoru that same night, doing heaven knows what, but Mina had a pretty good idea. Kaoru proved that theory to be true the next morning when she told Mina, Megumi, and Tsubame that she had lost her virginity. That right there was a dead giveaway. Although Mina denied it to everyone, even to herself, she had been so much in love with Kenshin Himura, to the point that it drove her senses wild whenever they were in the same room. Now though, she hated him so much it hurt her inside, but there was still that tiny little line that bordered her from falling in love with him all over again.

That little line had a name and it was Kaoru Kamiya. Love and hate had soon proved themselves to be more or less the same thing. Mina loved Kenshin and she hated him, or at least, she wanted to hate him, it went around full circle like the horses on the merry-go-round. Love was the other side of the quarter to hate, therefore, leaving Mina in the middle of it all. The fact that there was someone else out there that could ever possibly love Kenshin more than her was almost laughable, but definitely not impossible. What hurt Mina the most was that Kenshin seemed to return those feelings back to Kaoru, wearing his heart on his sleeve, ready to be torn to pieces whenever Kaoru decided that she was bored of his love. And when that day came, and Kenshin needed someone to lean on and help mend his heart, Mina would surely be there. No more lying to herself, she still loved him just as much as before.

"He made me love him," Mina whispered so softly that Kaoru scarcely heard her. Mina didn't actually want her to hear anyway because it would only cause her to worry more, but this time because of brutal competition. Mina snickered at the thought of fighting Kaoru for Kenshin, but she knew that she would never do it. Kaoru was too true of a friend to kick into oblivion. And if she was what Kenshin wanted, so be it. Mina wasn't about to stand in the way, but she was most definitely going to try her best to hate him, even if it was the hardest thing she ever had to do. It was what was best; for her and Kaoru's sake. In fact, pretending to loathe him became like routine for her and the cruel biting words came out like a broken record. It hurt him, yes, but it hurt her more.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?" Kaoru asked, leaning forward to hear Mina better, "I could have sworn you just said that you love him! Hahaha! Imagine that! YOU loving KENSHIN!" Kaoru burst out laughing at the thought and Mina played along, laughing with her.

"Eheh... Well, imagine that... It's nothing, Kaoru, just forget about it," Mina said, brushing off Kaoru's questioning with a wave of her hand, "I don't think you have to worry about Kenshin at this point. I mean, it's not like Kenshin's some kind of sex crazed maniac! He's probably not even had sex since you! And look at you! You had sex with.... How many people did you sleep with this year?"

"None..." Kaoru sighed, her shoulders sagging at the thought of Kenshin being with ten or so women when she hadn't even had sex with any other man besides him. To say she lost the rat race was an understatement.

"Oh.... well, that's not bad though! So now both of you haven't gotten any since each other! That's great! That means that you are one hundred percent of his sexual experience and he's one hundred percent of yours! This is perfect!" Mina exclaimed excitedly. She truly was happy for her friend because if there was anyone that deserved to have Kenshin, besides herself, it was Kaoru. "Coincidence?! I think not!" Mina announced, making Kaoru smile at the idea, "Come on! It's obvious that he hasn't stopped thinking about you! He almost got himself killed by your brother just so he could visit you at your house at the party, remember?"

"Mina, I think he just went to the party to hang out with his friends," Kaoru replied calmly, as usual only seeing the pessimistic things in the situation and Mina rolled her eyes at her unwise thinking.

"Bullshit! He wanted to see you!" Mina said, reassuring her even more, "Come on, are you just gonna sit there and sulk all day or are we going to figure out what you're going to wear when you go to meet Kenshin?"

Kaoru smiled at her, the kind of smile that enables you from keeping your eyes open and the apples of your cheeks from pumping up like a water balloon. Mina grinned back, glad that Kaoru was finally going back to her old self and she pulled her over to her closet and began throwing all of the clothes out all over the room. In no time at all, the room appeared to look like there was an explosion at the Gap.

The beach's sand was warm and rough under Yahiko's feet, perfect for playing a little football. Saito had a pretty good arm for the game and after persistent pestering from Yahiko, he had reluctantly agreed to join in a little throw-and-catch game. The ball ripped through the sky in a perfect spiral and Yahiko caught it easily in between his palms. In celebration to his quick reflexes, Yahiko slammed the football down into the sand and lifted his arms up in the air.

"Touch down for Team Yahiko!" Yahiko shouted as he ran around in circles, hooting and hollering as he ran around the "Superbowl stadium." Saito rolled his eyes and looked away from Yahiko, shoving his hands in his pockets in an effort to pretend like he didn't know the man that was now doing a little happy dance in the middle of the beach. But in doing so, his eyes caught a glimpse of Kenshin's red hair as he sat on the porch doing his Tantra exercises. 

Yahiko and Saito were now caught up in watching Kenshin shift around in different sitting and standing positions as directed in the book he was holding. Little did Saito know that Kenshin was actually building up his temperance for the arrival of Kaoru in a few days time. Kenshin knew he looked stupid, but the reward afterwards was well worth the embarrassment. And who knows, maybe he'd get to see Kaoru in a bikini? Okay, Kenshin, ease down on the drool.

"What the hell is that fucker doing?" Saito said to himself as he watched Kenshin doing squats on the front lawn. Yahiko was also in deep concentration in what Kenshin was doing and he threw the football to Saito, not really noticing for where he was aiming and the football came right in contact with Saito's crotch, sending him to his knees in pain. "Aw, man!" Saito yelped as he fell to the ground with his hands on his throbbing privates.

"Shit!" Yahiko shouted, looking nervously from Saito's fallen body to the open beach area for a place to hide, "Uh... he was like that before I got there!" Immediately, Yahiko ran inside the house, jumping over Saito's fallen body, who was still in too much pain to do anything more than moan in pain and Yahiko slammed the door to his room shut. "Oh my God, Saito's gonna kill me!" Yahiko said to himself, panicking and hyperventilating all at the same time, "Well, if he goes in here. I'll give him a Hyah! And a HYAH!" 

Yahiko punched into the air, imagining a very bruised up Saito falling down to the ground all bruised and beaten and Yahiko kicked his foot behind him to stop the invisible reinforcements from attacking him as well. In the process of his imaginary fight scene, Yahiko knocked over the lamp on his dresser and shattering it into a dozen pieces all over the room.

"Oh crap!" Yahiko exclaimed and he bent down to pick up the pieces in his bare hands, getting a scrape on his fingers in the process, "OW! Mother of! Jesus!.... Okay, I need to fix this... Super glue... super glue.... Ahah!" Yahiko grabbed the small tube of glue in his hands and worked a few drops onto the broken pieces, gently placing them back where they belonged. When that was all finished, Yahiko smiled in satisfaction to his work, even if the broken pieces were a little jumbled up, the lamp looked just as good to him. 

Lifting the lamp up by it's base, Yahiko tugged, but the lamp wouldn't move. 'What the hell?!' he thought as he struggled again to pry the lamp away from the dresser, but it didn't even budge. Finally, Yahiko threw his arms up in the air in defeat and stalked off out of his room, leaving the lamp glued on it's side to the top of his drawers.

  
  


Downstairs, Saito and Sanosuke were sitting on the couch watching a football game on TV, Saito with a nice cold ice pack to his crotch area. Sanosuke yawned, putting his hand to his mouth to cover up the noise and he shook his head to try and wake himself up. Clicking the TV off, Sanosuke got up from his seat and headed towards the stairs, not even bothering to say bye to Saito. Saito watched him walk away, knowing exactly what he planned to do once he got to his room and he stopped him before Sanosuke could even put one foot on the bottom step of the stairs.

"I wouldn't call that girlfriend of yours if I were you," Saito called over his shoulder, making Sanosuke pause in mid-step at Saito's psychic ability of knowing that he was about to pick up the phone and dial her number. Turning around slowly, Sanosuke looked back at the injured man on the couch with a quizzical expression.

"How did you know...?" Sanosuke started, but decided that that question wasn't the most important thing at the moment and he shifted from his left foot to his right, trying to find a more comfortable position to stand, "Wait, why wouldn't I want to call Megumi?"

Saito snickered at Sanosuke's obliviousness. The man obviously didn't learn anything about women throughout his entire life or else he wouldn't be asking him what he was. Saito sat up, but winced at the sudden jolt of pain that tore through him at even the slightest pressured movement and he laid back down to ease the pain.

"Didn't you learn anything at college, you moron? That girl of yours is over in America right now with some white dude bangin' her around like a hungry monkey yearning for some coconut!" Saito explained, making Sanosuke's mouth drop at the unexpected assumption, "Hell! If not one white guy, there's gotta be at least..." Saito paused to count the fingers on his hands. "There's gotta be at least like six blonde haired dudes having some massive orgy with her or somethin'! I can just see it now! Saito imitates Megumi's voice; not very well, I might add 'Oh, wow! American culture is sooooo interesting! Tell me, do Americans do it standing up or lying down?' or she'd be like, 'Oooooh! I just love these American-made homes, bet the bedrooms are big...'"

"Aw, fuck off, Saito!" Sanosuke half-shouted at him, "You don't know shit so don't start talking about her like that! Megumi wouldn't do that!" Although his words were strong, one had to admit, his mind wasn't exactly backing him up here. 

There was always gonna be that tiny little feeling of doubt nagging him in the back of his brain that maybe, just maybe, Megumi wasn't as into their relationship as he was, but still, Sanosuke would like to think that she wouldn't do something like that to him. She was definitely capable of going off and doing just what Saito had said, and Sanosuke was sure that whoever she was doing it with was more than happy to oblige. At times, he didn't even know what the hell a guy like himself was doing with a woman like Megumi, but he never thought to dwell on it too much. She was capable of ditching him at anytime she wanted and be able to get another boyfriend with a snap of her fingers, but Sanosuke didn't want to concentrate on all the 'what-if's' and 'could-have's' when he could be thinking all about what he and his girlfriend already had.

"Hah! You know she is, dude! You know it! I can tell by the way your face looks! You know that chick of yours can get any guy out there that she wants and somehow she picked you... This should be on one of those 'Mysteries of the Unexplained' shows!" Saito said, knowing that he had just passed a threshold and that he was definitely pushing some wrong buttons. Saito only grinned in utter contentment when he saw the red color rise up in Sanosuke's face and he turned to face him.

"Shut the hell up, Saito!" Sanosuke spat, and he made his way up the stairs, closing the door to his bedroom behind him, but not before he let out one last insult, "Go fist yourself!"

"Believe me, I would if it weren't for that damn friend of yours that can't throw a damn football!" Saito yelled back, but shut up once he realized that he had just yelled at nothing. Looking around to see if anyone had heard his "really cool" comeback and finding no one, Saito kicked the table in frustration. "OW!"

  
  


'I trust her, don't I?' Sanosuke thought to himself as he collapsed on his bed, his hands behind his head and his body stretched out over the blankets, 'I do, I do trust her... I think... Man, Megumi, I really hope you're not doing what Saito says you are...'

  
  


Megumi flipped through the English-Japanese dictionary in front of her, turning it right to left like how books are usually read in Japan, only to be stared at by a bunch of American guys at a nearby table. She smiled nervously at them and tried to figure out the complexity of the book's pages. It was more than obvious that she wasn't from around there, all she needed was a camera around her neck and a loud shirt and that would complete her whole tourist image. 

But, she was soon startled out of her concentration on the book when Aoshi arrived and plopped down in the seat across from her in the café. He looked exhausted from their four hour long shopping trip that Megumi had insisted they go on, but Megumi didn't even seem to be breaking out a sweat. If Aoshi had known the malls in America were so big, he would have worn exercise gear. He was able to force a slight smile in her direction, or what he hoped turned out to be a smile. 

Honestly, Aoshi never smiled, didn't even bother to try, but being with Megumi was different. He couldn't help but at least try to give her a little special treatment; after all, she was like a princess to him. 

Yes, he was well aware of her boyfriend back in Tokyo, but still that didn't mean that he couldn't at least try for it. He knew for a fact, or what he believed was a fact anyway, that long distance relationships didn't work out and when it didn't work, he would be first in line to pick up the leftovers. He would be there when she needed to cry over the break up and he would be there through it all. Aoshi was sure to let Megumi know that. He treated her with utter most respect, acted like everything a girl could ever want in a man; gentleman manners, did sweet favors for her for no particular reason, treated her like a queen, did whatever she asked without a moment's hesitation and did I forget to mention his gorgeous good looks? Aoshi was the most wanted guy on their entire school campus with his piercing ice blue eyes, tall figure, muscular body, dark bangs, chiseled facial features, and killer style. Yes, Aoshi had some definite hottie potential, ranking number one in 'perfect guy to end up with' on almost every girl in Tokyo University's list of Prince Charmings.

"Hello Aoshi," Megumi said, returning the smile he had given her. She couldn't think of another person that he had ever actually tried to smile at, but she shrugged the thought away as she tried again to understand how exactly she was supposed to read the American-made book. Megumi frowned at the confusing pages and finally with an exasperated huff of breath, she slammed the book down on the table in defeat. "That book is impossible!" she complained, slumping low in her chair and she glared at it with so much hate, it could have set itself on fire, "These white people have absolutely no idea how to make a book! I want to just go home already..."

"Already?" Aoshi asked, disappointed that she was so eager to get back into the open arms of her boyfriend at home in Japan, "But we haven't even seen all the landmarks that the college planned on yet. I thought you wanted to see the Golden Gate Bridge."

"I do, but I'm getting a little homesick. This school trip was supposed to help us with our studies, but I don't think I'll be learning anything about American medicine if I can't even read the stupid books!" Megumi huffed, taking her anger out on the book as she flung it into the nearby trash can, making it inside with one throw, "Haha! That's a three pointer right there! I think I can go pro!"

"Nice shot," Aoshi commented and Megumi grinned. She loved receiving compliments, no matter who it was from and it seemed that Aoshi always had one to give her. Forgetting about her once in a lifetime sport ability, she decided to concentrate more on the map he had displayed in front of them, pointing at all sorts of landmarks and cities they were going to visit next. "What do you say we go to the Grand Canyon next?" Aoshi suggested, but Megumi stuck out her tongue in disgust. The idea of seeing a big desert didn't seem to be the best choice for entertainment for her, she'd rather watch a seed grow into a tree rather than visit a scorching hot canyon and die of boredom. "No? Okay, you choose then," Aoshi said, handing the map over to Megumi so she could choose their next destination.

"Hm... well, we can always go to an amusement park or something," Megumi said, a small smile creeping over her red lips, "I've heard some great things about Disneyland!" 

Aoshi smiled at that. It didn't really matter where they went, children's amusement park, pet cemetery, the next world war, anywhere; Aoshi could have cared less. All he wanted was to make the most of the time he had with Megumi before they had to return to Japan and she would no longer be with him. Aoshi knew that she cared for Sanosuke, he could tell by the way her eyes sparkled whenever she spoke of him, but the real question was, how much she cared about him. 

Aoshi knew all about his high rankings in the perfect guy column in Tokyo University's paper and he considered himself a pretty good catch. Putting all that in mind, he thought he had a pretty good chance with the aspiring lady doctor. The only little thing in the way was her boyfriend, but he was about a thousand miles away from where he and Megumi now sat, and that gave him, Aoshi, the upper hand in the situation. 'Sanosuke is a lucky guy, very lucky indeed,' Aoshi thought to himself, 'he's just lucky that he got to her first...' 

Megumi stood up from her seat, completely unaware of Aoshi's thoughts and feelings for her as she ushered him to follow her so they could continue with their tour around San Francisco. Aoshi stood up and followed her, only a few steps behind her, close enough to smell the flower scents in her hair. For now, this was all he had of her, only precious moments which she didn't even know he cherished, but as limited as he had, Aoshi was going to take all he could get from Megumi Takani. For now, he'd keep his feelings hidden, but there comes a time when the butterfly has to break out of the cocoon and test out it's wings. 'Sanosuke Sagara,' Aoshi thought, 'prepare yourself for some serious competition...'

  
  


A/N: HI! Okay, sorry for the slow updating. Well, this chapter wasn't very funny, sorry about that too, but it builds up more of the drama I added in this story. As you can tell, most of this chapter wasn't in the movie so it's original. Anyway, reviews, as always, are very very welcome!


	8. Heterosexual Experimenting

Disclaimer: RK and American Pie 2? Not mineChapter 7:

"Heterosexual Experimenting"

  
  


It was about eleven o'clock in the evening when Saito barged into the living room, his hands full with a humongous cardboard box that he had impeccably labeled "Stuff." He smirked when he saw Sanosuke, Yahiko, and Kenshin all sitting around the television, just as he had suspected they would be. The guys he was staying with weren't exactly the biggest party animals in the world, and Saito already knew that he would most likely find them where they were right now, bored off their asses in front of the TV. 

Setting the prodigious box of lubricants, hentai videos, and magazines down on the couch, Saito began throwing the contents out at them, and all the items landed perfectly in their laps, except of course, the video Saito threw at Kenshin's head. With his perfect aim, the tape hit him right in the middle of the forehead and Kenshin toppled over with an exclaimed, "Oro?!" One lubricant tube and one hentai video per person, only Kenshin got something extra; a bump on the head.

"You morons need to go entertain yourselves. Go, have fun, but no weird sausage fests, alright? I don't want anymore of that non-straight shit in the beach house. Looks like you guys could use some heterosexual distractions," Saito grumbled, taking out his own things from the box as he headed over to the telephone, which had now been ringing for about two minutes. "Hello, Saito's poon palace, how can I help you?... Oh, it's you. Yeah, we're all settled here already. Uh huh. Tomorrow? Yeah, sure, that's fine. How many friends are you bringing? Oh alright... The party's gonna be in a few weeks so you might as well come over here and get yourself unpacked and all. Yeah, okay. Alright, bye." Saito hung up the phone and took his pick of the many leftover porn videos in the box before heading upstairs, all the guys in the living room wondering who had been on the phone. Kenshin was the first to speak up.

"Uh, Saito? Was that by any chance...?" Kenshin began, but was cut off by Saito flipping him off as he made his way up to his room, ignoring Kenshin's existence completely. Kenshin smiled in spite of the finger Saito had held up to him and he turned towards Yahiko and Sano with an ear to ear grin. "I'm guessing that Kaoru was on the phone, that I am. Why else wouldn't Saito tell me who it was? Oh my! I better prepare! Temperance must be doubled!" Kenshin shouted as he hurried up the stairs with God-like speed, "I need to do more Tantra exercises, that I do!"

Sanosuke smiled at the red head's idiotic "exercises", or at least that's what Kenshin liked to call them. Honestly, Sanosuke thought that Kenshin was just going to make a complete fool out of himself if he did that weird thrusting stuff in front of Kaoru, but hey, it was Kenshin's business if he wanted to impress, or freak out, the girl or not. Sanosuke didn't have any say in it, but he did feel kind of sorry for his friend for how hard Kaoru was gonna crack up when she saw him doing that shit. Turning to Yahiko, he saw that Yahiko had the same smile on his face and he was most likely thinking the same thing that he was.

"Well, I'm gonna hit the sack," Sanosuke yawned as he got up from his seat, stretching out his arms, "You gonna go to sleep now too or you gonna stay down here?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty tired too," Yahiko said and he stood up from the groove imprint he had put on his chair due to the massive amount of sitting he did in it that day, "I'll see you in the morning then."

Sanosuke nodded, walking into his room and closing the door behind him. Immediately, he fell onto the bed from utter exhaustion, not even remembering to call Megumi, and in a matter of seconds, he was snoring.

Yahiko tucked himself into his bed, the "fixed" lamp still stuck on it's side on top of the dresser as he pulled out a postcard he had received that day from Tsubame. It read:

Dearest Yahiko,

I can't wait until I see you! Two weeks seems like forever... China is beautiful, but it would be much better if you were here! I'll see you soon!"

Love,

Tsubame

"Well, I wish you were here too, Tsubame," Yahiko whispered into the small picture of China and placing the postcard under his pillow once more, he relaxed, getting comfortable under the covers as he closed his eyes to prepare for sleep. Suddenly, Yahiko's eyes shot open as he remembered that, hey, he was horny (A/N: what else is new?!), and Saito had just supplied them with some porno and lubricants. Now, Yahiko had never tried using lubricant before, but he was willing to experiment. 

Grabbing the tube from next to the broken lamp, the super glue tube right next to it, Yahiko brought the tube up to his face, reading the directions out loud. 

"Add a few drops for desired lubrication," Yahiko read out loud. Rolling his eyes, he set the lubricant back down on the dresser, changing his mind. "Nah..." Figuring he could do without the lube job, he clicked on the TV, popped in the porn video and he settled farther into the pillows to watch. 

After a few minutes of the erotic images on the television, Yahiko's eyes seemed to dart back to his dresser to look at the tube of lubricant that looked so tempting. Again, he shook his head. But after a certain scene passed the television, he found himself frantically grabbing for the lubricant, never taking his eyes off the television screen as he grabbed the closest tube on the dresser. Twisting off the cap, Yahiko squirted a huge dollop of the stuff onto his hands and worked it into a lather before reaching down into his boxers to put the stuff to good use. A few seconds of masturbating with the sticky substance, Yahiko found it to be a whole lot better than just using his hand.

"Whoa! This stuff rocks! I've been missing out! Aww, yeah, baby.... dude, that feels so..." Yahiko murmured, his words trailing off as his pleasure was soon replaced with pain as he tried to move his hand to continue moving over his cock, but his hand wouldn't move. Puzzled, Yahiko tried again, yanking his hand away from his crotch area only to discover himself stuck and he screamed out in pain as he tried to tear his hand away again. "OW! Fuck, fuck, fuck! Oh shit! Shit, I'm stuck! Oh my god! My hand is stuck to my dick..." Yahiko looked down at his private area, his hand deeply embedded in his boxers. Yahiko looked from his crotch to the dresser, his eyes widening as he looked at the tube he had used for "lubricant." The tube read, "Mr. Sticky's Super Glue! You smash it, we clash it!" 

His eyes widened in fear and he took a long deep breath as he tried again to get his hand off, but the pain seared through him, even stronger than before, and he fell off the bed, creating a loud thump as he hit the floor. 

"What the hell is going in there, Yahiko?!" Saito shouted from down the hall. He had heard the loud noise, therefore disturbing the sound effects from the hentai video he had been watching and no doubt, Saito was pissed off for the interruption. "How do you expect me to wack off when you're doing God knows what in that room of yours?! Quit moving around or I'll knock down that door right now and...!"

"No! No! No! Don't come in here! I'm fine! I'm fine! I just uh... I just accidently fell off the bed, that's all. Go back to your room, Saito! I'll be quiet! Just whatever you do, don't come in here!" Yahiko hollered back as he struggled to get back up, but he soon found that it was much harder to lift himself up with only one hand.

"You better shut up then! If I hear one more sound outta you, I'm busting that door down and then I'm gonna ram one of Kenshin's huge ass meditating books up your nose!" Saito threatened and he trudged back to his room, grumbling about stupid noisy morons all the way.

As soon as he heard the door closed, Yahiko turned back to the situation at hand. (A/N: HAHA! Pun intended!) Straining under the delicate nerves from his hand to his wiener, Yahiko finally managed to get up and he hobbled over to the VCR, pulling out the porn tape from the monitor with his free hand and he flung his hand under the bed. The video didn't move.

"What the hell?!" Yahiko whispered as he tried again to toss the video tape under the bed, but the video refused to leave the palm of his hand, "Not again! Get off! Get offa me! Off! Now!" Yahiko placed the video down on the carpet, stepping on it with his right foot to try and pry it off, but the tape didn't move an inch. "Damn it! Why does this shit always happen to me?!" Yahiko mouthed as he hit the video tape against the wall to try and break it into tiny pieces, but he only hit his hand and he swore out loud as the back of his hand came into contact with the wall, "Aw, mother of! Ow!" Yahiko bit down on his lip to silence himself from screaming out right as he accidently put more strain on his sensitive attachment of his hand to his dick. The scream came out muffled and gagged as Yahiko bit down hard on his lower lip, drawing blood as he teeth sank in a little too low. He had to grit his teeth together from yelling out right there.

Thirty minutes later, Yahiko had the telephone on top of the porno tape as he tried to dial the Poison Control number using his nose. Finally, after about fifteen tries, the phone began to ring on the other end and Yahiko brought the phone up to his ear, completely out of breath.

"Hello? Uh, Poison Control? I have this problem with uh... Mr. Sticky's super glue. Yeah, I kind of uh.... super glued myself to uh..." Yahiko paused to look down at his private parts, "to myself... What?! No! Don't call an ambulance! Why, what do you mean 'Why?' No, you just can't! Isn't there... isn't there something around the house that I can use?... Paint thinner? Yeah, okay, thanks a lot!" Yahiko dropped the phone to the floor, not even bothering to put it back on the receiver and strain himself all over again. It had been enough trouble trying to pick the phone up, he wasn't about to trouble himself with putting it back. Now, his next big challenge was going to be opening the door to his room without using any of his hands... 

Determined to end this hellish nightmare, Yahiko got up from the bed, glaring at the doorknob as if he were about to murder it with his gaze and suddenly, he broke out into a run, slamming his mouth around the knob so hard that his whole mouth started to vibrate from the impact. Shaking the feeling away, Yahiko put his hand holding the video tape on top of the knob, twisting and turning it to try and open the door, but the knob didn't even move, not a bit. Sighing and completely exhausted, Yahiko leaned his forehead against the door as he panted for breath before trying to twist the knob open with his mouth again. All he got was a chipped tooth. He thought again about calling for help from either Kenshin or Sano, but then another thought came into his head, and that thought being that someone would actually have to find out what happened with the glue. He'd never live it down. 

Suddenly, an idea came to him as he turned his head slowly over to the open window of his room, big enough to climb through.

'If I can just get out the window, jump off the roof and make it over to the painter's truck outside, then I can get myself outta this sticky situation,' Yahiko thought to himself, 'it can't be that hard... I've seen those kids do it on that Dawson's Creek show dozens of times! But then again, none of them had their hands glued down their pants... Okay, just get this over with!'

Tiptoeing, he made his way over to the window, easing himself onto the window sill and very carefully turning his body around so that his feet landed on the roof. With only his boxers on, Yahiko discovered that the night was actually a whole lot colder than he first thought. He suddenly wished he had some kind of robe on. As quietly and gingerly as possible, Yahiko crept over to the edge of the roof to look over the end, only to realize that the ground was way too far down for him to make it down safely. He may be stupid but he wasn't about to jump two stories high to the ground, especially with his hand glued to his penis.

"Aw, well fuck me!" he muttered as he tried to shake his fist at the ground, but only further agitated himself and he let out a cry of, "Ow!"

Across the street, a young girl looked out her window and saw Yahiko, his hand in his pants, creeping around on the roof at about midnight. The girl's eyes widened as her gaze focused on what he had in his hands. She gasped out loud and immediately ran to the phone to dial the neighborhood policeman and direct him to the pervert across the street.

Yahiko, unaware that anyone had seen him, frowned down at the ground that was about triple what his height was. Shaking his head in disappointment, Yahiko turned around to head back to the window when a set of red headlights appeared in the driveway. The neighborhood police officer stepped out of his car, shining a flashlight in Yahiko's eyes and he brought the megaphone up to his lips.

"Hey! You! On the roof! Put your hands where I can see 'em!" the officer ordered through the megaphone. His tone of voice showed that he was not at all amused by how Yahiko looked at that moment. In fact, for all the policeman knew, Yahiko seemed to be some sicko with weird kicks that enjoyed jacking off on his roof in the middle of the night. The policeman shuddered at the thought. "Alright, you sick fuck! I said put your hands up and I meant it! Now, hands in the air!"

Yahiko did the only thing he could do at the moment, he raised his only free hand, hentai tape and all as he did so and he squinted against the bright lights shining in his face. Again, he tried to pull his hand off his cock, but he only fell over from the pain.

By now, the police officer was getting pretty annoyed by Yahiko's lack of obedience to put both his hands up and the officer growled in anger to his refusal.

"Both hands in the air, sir! NOW!" the policeman shouted, Yahiko still not able to see him clearly from the incandescent flashing headlights.

"I.... I can't! I'm glued! I'm glued!" Yahiko yelled back and he struggled again to pull himself off of... himself and prove to it to the officer, only to his lose his balance, "WHOA!!!!!!!"

Yahiko was completely helpless as he tumbled over onto his side and began rolling off the rooftop at incredible speed with him powerless to stop it as his free hand flailed out into the air before he came down, face first onto the front lawn. Groaning slightly, Yahiko lifting up his one arm to try and push himself up, but he collapsed back down from complete fatigue.

By the time the ambulance came and placed Yahiko on the stretcher, Kenshin, Sanosuke, and Saito were all outside in the driveway, watching as the paramedics wheeled away a very sensitive Yahiko on the bed. Kenshin and Sanosuke tried to give Yahiko some encouragement by giving him what they aimed to be hopeful smiles, but instead they came out weary and tired. They both climbed into the ambulance behind the stretcher and Saito ran forward with a huge grin on his face, but one of the paramedics stopped him before he could set foot into the truck.

"Excuse me, sir, but are you a friend of this young man or a family member?" the paramedic asked Saito and he only turned to him with a clever smirk.

"Fuck no! I'm not related or friends with that moron! This is just too good to miss!" Saito laughed and the paramedic only shook his head at him as he closed the back doors of the ambulance closed, leaving Saito out in the driveway. He grinned at Yahiko, giving him a fake thumbs up before he burst out laughing and the ambulance drove away towards the local hospital.

Even after they were in the hospital's parking lot, Yahiko could swear he could still hear Saito's laughter echoing in his ears.

"Don't worry, Yahiko! It happens to the best of us, that it does!" Kenshin called from outside the room his friend had been ushered into, but at the look he received from Sanosuke, Kenshin changed his mind, "Actually, no, it doesn't..."

Kenshin and Sanosuke were required to stay out in the waiting room as the doctors went in to treat Yahiko. Sanosuke gave his black spiky haired friend one last wave before the doors were slowly closed to give them some privacy. They waited for about an hour before a doctor appeared. Walking over to them, he pushed up his spectacles to the bridge of his nose and looked from one expectant face to another.

"Come with me," the doctor replied as he ushered them both into the room where Yahiko was now standing, a huge pack of gauze wrapped tightly over his entire groin area like a diaper. Sanosuke bit his lip to keep from laughing and Yahiko shot him a glare that could have melted an iceberg. Kenshin stayed silent, the only one listening to the doctor. "Well, it was quite a struggle, but we were able to unstick him," the doctor explained, pulling the white rubber gloves off his hands and he threw them in a nearby trash can, "He's going to have to take it easy for the next ten days or so. Please make sure that he doesn't strain himself."

"TEN DAYS?!" Yahiko exclaimed, his mouth hanging open in shock of the prolonged period of time he had to wait until he was fully healed. 'God damn that super glue!' he thought, making a serious mental note to always use tape on everything from now on. "But we've got the party in seven and Tsubame's coming all the way from China!" Yahiko protested, not that it really helped, but he needed to get the outrage out of his system, "And she's gonna wanna well... you know... Please! You gotta help me! Isn't there something you can give me?!"

"I suggest that you keep your pants on at that party of your's then. I don't think you'd want to further aggravate yourself even more. You've put enough strain as it is," the doctor explained, staying true to his prescription for Yahiko to lay off the undoing of his pants, "I think you can wait a few days after the party to see this girl now, can't you?"

"Uh... actually, Doc, he can't wait that long. It's either this Saturday or never," Sanosuke said with his hand behind his back as he tried to explain the issue of just how Yahiko's raging hormones really worked to the highly educated doctor. Now, the doctor was in fact, PH.D., but Sanosuke was pretty sure that he had absolutely no idea just how horny Yahiko could get and missing his last chance with Tsubame would make his libido ten times worse. Hell, Sano wouldn't be surprised if he caught Yahiko screwing a pie! 

'Nah, not like that'd ever happen...' Sanosuke thought with a shake of his head. He'd like to think that Yahiko had a little more class than that. He couldn't have been more wrong... 

"And what if his pants were to 'accidently' per say, come off at the time of the party? Do you think he'd be able to use his uh... thing to it's uttermost potential in his sexual relations?" Kenshin asked as professionally as he could, but he actually came out sounding like he was trying too hard.

"Um... What Kenshin means is, 'If Yahiko was going to have sex with Tsubame, would he be able to?' Like without... I dunno... breaking something?" Sanosuke translated. It was pretty amazing in general that he was actually able to understand Kenshin in the first place, what with the big words and everything. Everyone missed the paleness of Yahiko's face when Sanosuke said the words, "breaking something."

"Well, there is something that might help. Here, this cream should lessen the healing process down a few days," the doctor said, finally giving in to the pushy teenagers. After all he was once one himself, and it wasn't that hard to understand reasons for getting with that one special girl. He handed Yahiko the tube and left the room, his clipboard in hand and his footsteps disappeared as he got farther and farther down the hall. 'Good luck, Kid. You'll need it...' the doctor thought as he entered the room of the next patient, hoping with all his might that Yahiko would be able to finally have a chance with the girl he was so obviously obsessed with.

"Okay, I think we're gonna have to run out to the car..." Sanosuke said, scratching his head as he usually did whenever he was confused, nervous, embarrassed, actually, no, he just always scratched his head.

"Why do we have to run?" Kenshin asked, puzzled by Sanosuke suggestion that they waste their breath running from the third floor down to the parking lot. And there went Sano scratching his head again. 'I swear,' Kenshin thought, 'if I didn't know any better, I'd think he had a serious case of dandruff!'

"Well, first off, Yahiko here is wearing a huge diaper," Sanosuke said bluntly.

"Hey! This is NOT a diaper!" Yahiko shouted in protest, but Sanosuke ignored him and continued on.

"Second, he has no spare clothes with him," Sanosuke continued and Kenshin nodded, realizing this as well, "and third, there's no way in hell, he's gonna borrow any of mine! So if you wanna walk all the way down to the parking lot from up here with the Huggies commercial ad, you can at least give him your jacket or something. I don't know about you, but I'd prefer to avoid getting pointed and stared at. I mean, I might need to come back here someday..."

Yahiko's face went red with anger, his head down as his nostrils flared and smoke spurted out from his ears. He suddenly jerked his head up to glare at Sanosuke as he pounced on him, jumping on his back and getting a firm grip on his brown spiky hair as he dug his teeth into his scalp.

"Take that back!" Yahiko shouted through bites, "If you're gonna be so embarrassed, why don't you give me something to wear?! Kenshin's stuff smells funny!"

"ORO?!" Kenshin shouted at the unexpected insult, "Yahiko, don't you think you should be at least a little nicer to us? We are paying for your hospital bill, after all, that we are. Maybe you shouldn't take it for granted."

"Yeah! Don't be so ungrateful!" Sanosuke said as he picked off Yahiko from his death grip on his skull and set him down on the ground, "You know we have to dip into the beach house payment so we can pay for this?! Hospitalization isn't cheap, you know!"

Yahiko only looked at the ground in shame, taking in the guilt like it was a hard punch to the face and he winced at the thought. He owed them both a lot, Saito was another story though. He was the one that had given him the lubricant in the first place, therefore, making him interested in it and then he got it confused with the super glue. Yahiko shook his head at his thinking, it wasn't right to blame someone else for what was clearly his fault. It was always just so much easier to blame someone else, and since Saito was always a jerk, it made it so much easier to place the blame on him.

Sanosuke, Kenshin, and Yahiko spent the next half hour sneaking around the hospital to avoid being seen and pointed at as they made their way to the elevator which would take them straight down to the parking lot. It was just too bad that all the shelves, passing stretchers, and trash cans they tried to hide behind were a few feet too short to give them the amount of cover they needed. Looking from left to right, Kenshin quickly scurried over to the next barrier which so happened to be a very thin house plant and after a few seconds, he signaled to Sanosuke and Yahiko to follow suit once the coast was clear. Picking the smaller man up, Sano carefully edged his way over to the plant as well, not at all big enough to hide three grown men, and joined Kenshin near their escape route; the elevator.

They could only pray that there was no one in the elevator as the tiny compartment came to a stop in front of them and the doors slid open. Kenshin stood behind Yahiko so that no one could see him from behind and Sanosuke stood in front of him to block the front view and they all cringed as the bell sounded and the elevator doors opened up. Four people stared back at them inside the elevator with confused expressions. The first person to react was Kenshin as he sidestepped to look at a few familiar people inside the elevator.

"Kaoru! Megumi! Mina! Uh... I'm sorry, I don't think I know your name," Kenshin said as he acknowledged all the people in the elevator, pausing as his gaze settled on the tall man in the back with a large trench coat.

"There you are! We've been looking all over for you! We stopped by the beach house but Saito said you guys were at the hospital!" Megumi exclaimed, looking from Sanosuke to Kenshin with a relieved smile, "I didn't really catch what that idiot was saying though. He just wouldn't stop laughing for some reason... Hey, wait a second!" Megumi paused to count heads. "There's only two of you! Where's Yahiko?"

"Eheheheheheh... he's um..." both Kenshin and Sanosuke stuttered, nervously laughing at the situation even though there was absolutely nothing funny about it. (Okay, maybe there was...) Suddenly, Kenshin perked up as he made contact with the man again in the back of all his female friends. "Hey, never seen you before!" he quickly changed the subject and he stuck out his hand to shake, bringing the attention away from the question of Yahiko's whereabouts, "I'm Kenshin." 

"Oh, I'm sorry! I forgot! Kenshin, this is Megumi's friend, Aoshi Shinimori," Kaoru said, gesturing to the silent man in the back and she turned to Aoshi, gesturing towards Kenshin, "Aoshi, this is a friend of our's, Kenshin Himura. And the man in front of him is Sanosuke Sagara, Megumi's boyfriend."

"Yes, I know. We've met before," Aoshi replied and he gave a nod to Sanosuke and then to Kenshin, "So why are we all here at the hospital? None of you seem to be hurt or..." Aoshi trailed off as he finally realized for the first time, the young man hiding behind Sano, wearing nothing but cotton wrappings around his crotch area. Curiously, Aoshi tilted his head to the side in puzzlement and frowned, "Are you wearing a diaper?"

  
  


A/N: So this was kind of a comedy relief chapter from the last one. Next up, Sano gets to feel a lil more of that thing called competition between the Ice man and his girlfriend. Also, Misao decides to drop by the beach house for a bit and pop in a movie. Hm... Can Yahiko sit still throughout an entire movie without disrupting anyone this time? (Take a look at JP1 "Movie Time" if you don't really remember what happened last time) Leave a review!


	9. Another Disruption

A/N: Okay, if you haven't seen the movie "From Hell" (which I also don't own) or you're planning on seeing it, this chapter spoils the ending. Hey! Don't look at me! It's Yahiko's fault!

  
  


Chapter 8:

"Another Disruption"

  
  


"Hey Yahiko!" Misao exclaimed from the doorway, practically causing Yahiko to double over in surprise to well... her in his beach house. It was funny, he didn't remember giving her the address... Misao kept her hands in check, gently gripping a small bag in front of her with a huge grin on her face, but that was suddenly replaced with a worried expression as she remembered the reason she had come over to the beach house in the first place. "I heard about your little uh... accident and all. Are you feeling any better? How're the twig and dingle berries?"

Everyone sat in the living room, all either on the couches or the floor, but it didn't really matter where they sat since either way, all their attentions were on Yahiko and his little guest at the door. Yahiko scratched his head in embarrassment at her acknowledging his super glue charade, which he always told everyone to refer to as 'the unfortunate incident.' Still, even if he was mortified, he was very flattered that Misao had been worried about him and he thought it to was very nice of her to stop by and see how he was doing.

"Uh... they're... I mean! I'm fine now, thanks," Yahiko said nervously, but he forgot all about that when he saw what was in her hand, "What's that you got there? You go to Blockbuster or something?"

"Huh? Oh, this! Yeah, I thought if you were feeling better then we can watch 'From Hell' if you want," Misao suggested as she held up the video tape for him to see, "You haven't seen it yet, have you?"

"I don't think so...," Yahiko replied and he sidestepped to allow her to come inside, "But then I do have really bad memory... Just pop it into the VCR in the living room over there. Misao, this is everybody. Everybody, this is Misao."

"Hi! Do you guys want to watch the movie too?" Misao asked, turning to face them all, a friendly smile on her face, "I don't think I've seen it, but then sometimes in the middle of the movie, I realize that I have. Kind of like this one time at band camp..."

Yahiko, Sanosuke, and Kenshin all sweat dropped as Misao started on one of her ongoing band camp stories and Yahiko quickly laughed before she could finish her story, interrupting her right in the middle of it. Misao turned to face him with a confused expression, but he only laughed harder and shrugged his shoulders.

"Good story, Misao!" Yahiko exclaimed nervously. "Hey! I know! Why don't we watch the movie now?" he hinted and everyone in the room, besides Misao of course, breathed a sigh of relief that he had changed the subject. Surprisingly, Misao smiled and put the movie into the VCR with no objections and then plopped down next to Yahiko on the couch. Somewhere in the room, someone's stomach grumbled... really loud.

"I'm gonna get some popcorn then," Kaoru proposed with a sigh and she got up from her seat next to Kenshin, making him pout at her absence, even if it was only for a few seconds. Without even thinking, Kenshin jumped up from his seat and simply insisted that he go to help her, after all popcorn was a little "dangerous." He didn't even catch the glare he received from Mina, who sat in front of him on the floor as he hurried past to catch up with Kaoru.

"Is popcorn really that hard to control these days?!" Saito grumbled as he took in a breath from his cigarette, blowing it out in a big "O" shape just to show off, "You stay the hell away from the popcorn, Shit-Break! That's jizz-free popcorn!" At no response, Saito got up from his seat and stalked over to the kitchen with every intention of decapitating the red headed rurouni. "Hey! I was talking to you!"

Aoshi frowned at the man and turned over to Megumi on his right to whisper into her ear.

"Is your friend always like that?" he asked and Megumi laughed out loud, startling Sano from the sudden outburst and rousing suspicions that Saito had earlier confirmed. 

He had no idea what Aoshi had told his girlfriend that made her laugh so hard, but he did know that he didn't like it. Not one bit. He didn't even realize that he was grinding his teeth together until Yahiko nudged him and whispered, "Yeah, I don't like him either." Sanosuke smiled at his friend and gave him an appreciative nod before both spiky heads turned to glare at Aoshi as Megumi tried to control her laughter.

"Yes, he's always like that, but I wouldn't exactly call Hajime my friend," Megumi tried to explain, completely unaware of the invisible daggers that Yahiko and Sanosuke were throwing at her uninvited friend, Aoshi, "He's just uh... an acquaintance, I guess. I think you can already tell that he and Kenshin don't get along very well. Kaoru over there is Hajime's sister and Kenshin's current love interest. Kinda funny how this place didn't turn into some kind of famous soap opera, huh?"

"Don't call me Hajime!" Saito protested from the doorway as he headed back to his seat on the couch, a little iffed about the sound of his real name, and he grumbled under his breath as he handed Sanosuke the bowl of popcorn, "Here, it's jizz-free. Enjoy." When Sano didn't answer, Saito waved a hand in front of his face, checking if his senses were still working correctly, but Sanosuke still didn't even flinch. 

Very curious, Saito leaned over and followed Sanosuke's glare to the man on Megumi's left, Aoshi Shinimori, and he snickered. Nudging Sanosuke in the ribs, Saito nodded toward the two, making a suggestive gesture about them, indicating some kind of major humping session, and Sanosuke shot him an icy glare. 

"I told you that girlfriend of yours was getting banged," Saito whispered, "but who would've thought it was that guy. I thought it'd probably be some white shit or something. Oh well, whatever floats your boat! Hahaha!"

"Shut up, HAJIME!" Sanosuke growled, still not able to turn away the icy stare he had placed on Aoshi's back as he and Megumi continued to talk, much to his disappointment, "He's just her friend and that's all."

"Yeah, riiiiiight! And I'm Puff Daddy! Jesus, moron! Wake up and smell Shit-Break's jizz! In case you didn't notice, your girlfriend's hot! Girls like that can get with whoever they want, whenever they want and you're probably already in the fucking dog house," Saito mocked him, still not loud enough for anyone else to hear, but loud enough that it rang in Sanosuke's ears, "If that girlfriend of yours hasn't already cheated on you, she's gonna. 'Cause I'm telling you right now, that Aoshi guy, has his eye on her. The question is, what are you gonna do about it?"

At that, Saito slunk away, leaving Sanosuke with his thoughts and he settled down on the floor next to Mina, who was rolling her eyes at Kenshin and Kaoru on the couch together, grumbling under her breath.

"So Mina, how many girls did you fuck this year?" Saito asked her and her head whipped around so fast that her hair slapped him in the face, "OW! What the hell?!"

"Humph! Wouldn't you like to know..." Mina replied with a huff, ignoring the fact that she had just whacked him in the face with her ponytail, "Probably more than you did, Hajime." She would've said more due to her horrible mood at the time, but Mina was soon cut off by Yahiko who leaned forward in his seat, his index finger to his lips as he shushed her and pointed at the TV screen to indicate that he was trying to watch. Mina rolled her eyes, but obeyed him none the less.

The movie had just started and the main characters were being introduced, unfortunately, Yahiko and Misao happened to be quite the talkers during movies (if you remember from the earlier story you know what I'm talking about) so everyone else watching couldn't really hear what was being said over their chatter. When Heather Graham made her first appearance on the screen, Yahiko stood up and walked over to the television screen and kissed her image on the TV.

"Yahiko, cut it out!" Kaoru shouted, throwing a pillow at him from her place on the couch, "Leave Heather Graham alone! What did she ever do to deserve that?!" Everyone burst out laughing, much to Yahiko embarrassment and he shook his fist at her, blocking the screen as he stood up and yelled at her.

"Hey! This movie wasn't brought here for you, Ugly!" Yahiko objected, shaking his fist at her as if he held her neck in his hand and he stuck his tongue out to mock her, "You're just jealous 'cause no one would ever wanna kiss YOUR picture!"

"Why you little...!" Kaoru started, but Kenshin grabbed a hold of her around the waist, holding her back from strangling the breath out of his friend. Amazingly, Kaoru was a lot stronger than he first suspected and he had a little trouble keeping her back.

"Ug-ly! Ug-ly! Nah nah nah nah nah nah!" Yahiko teased and he started dancing around the room in all his glory, shaking his butt in front of her, "Can't touch this! Duh nuh nuh nuh! Duh nuh duh nuh! Can't touch this!"

"I love that song!" Misao exclaimed, jumping up and down from her seat and she started to sing along with him, "Can't touch this! Duh nuh nuh nuh! Duh nuh duh nuh! Can't touch this!"

"Aw shit, now he's got the weasel girl singing too! That's it!" Saito muttered, finally fed up with Yahiko's interrupting the movie and he picked him up by his shirt to bring him up to his eye level, "Quit dancin' around! I'm trying to...!"

"Shhh!" Yahiko said, putting a finger to his lips and he pointed at the movie playing on the TV behind him. Saito grumbled something about annoying morons that didn't know when to shut up and he set Yahiko back down on the ground. With Saito's back turned, Yahiko held up a certain finger at his back, and seeing this in the picture frame in front of him, Saito whirled back around. Yahiko immediately put his hand down and behind his back, whistling a soft tune as he "innocently" walked past him to his seat back on the couch next to Misao. Saito watched his every movement, just in case.

Meanwhile, Kenshin and Kaoru sat on their own little couch on the left side of the room, a little secluded from everyone else, something that Mina acknowledged a lot more than anyone else did. She turned away with a gruff mumble, trying her best to concentrate on the movie in front of her, but because she had been watching Kenshin and Kaoru most of the time, she didn't have the slightest idea of what was going on. She was startled out of her thoughts when Yahiko jumped up from his seat to point at the screen.

"He's gonna kill you! He's gonna kill you! Behind you! Behind you!" Yahiko shouted at the girl on screen, not like she would hear him or anything, but Yahiko felt it was necessary to yell at her anyway, "NO! That's poison, you idiot! Don't drink it! Don't drink it!"

"Turn around! Turn around!" Misao shouted with him as she got up from her seat as well for the second time throughout the movie, "OH MY GOD! He's got a knife! It's the killer!"

"RUN, YOU SORRY ASS! Run your ass off!" Yahiko yelled again, this time joined by Misao as they both jumped up and down and shouted, "RUN! RUN! RUN!"

"Whoa! That chick is so hot!" Yahiko exclaimed as he pointed at one of the girls in the movie, "AND she's got huge ass tities! She can like smother you! Hahahahaha! She's got to be the killer then! She's gonna crush you with her jugs!"

"Yahiko! She's not even a main character! How can you think that she's..!" Sanosuke protested, but Yahiko only put a finger to his lips to shush him and pointed again at the movie in front of them. Reluctantly, Sanosuke settled back down next to Megumi, who's conversation with Aoshi was now over and she was now happily eating some popcorn.

Out of nowhere, Megumi started coughing as a tiny popcorn went down the wrong tube and she coughed again to clear her throat. Putting an arm around her in concern, Sanosuke patted his hand on her back.

"You okay?" he asked her and she nodded, clearing her throat again to try and dilute the small kernel, and she swallowed back to ease her parched throat.

"I'm gonna get you some water," Aoshi said voluntarily and he got up to go to the kitchen without even a moment's hesitation. But as soon as Aoshi was out of the room and Sanosuke had made sure that Megumi was alright, Saito coughed to cover up his next phrase that he meant for only Sanosuke to hear, but Yahiko and Kenshin heard it as well.

"cough Wants your girlfriend cough, cough" Saito wheezed, hitting his chest with his fist in an effort to clear his throat too even if there really was nothing there, "Gee, I wish I had a secret admirer to get ME a glass of water..." Saito made sure that he said that part out loud, just as Aoshi walked back into the room with a glass of water and handed it to Megumi.

"What'd you say, Hajime?" Megumi asked curiously, turning her attention away from the screen to look at the former captain of the lacrosse team at Jinchuu, unsure if she had heard him correctly.

"Me?" Saito asked innocently and he smirked, "I didn't say anything." 

"Here you go," Aoshi said with a smile as he handed Megumi the glass and he gently put a hand on her shoulder, "You sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about it, Aoshi, I wasn't choking or anything," Megumi replied with a reassuring smile and she took a sip of the water, "Thanks anyway for being concerned and for the water."

Aoshi nodded and took his seat next to her again, this time about an inch closer to her than before. Sanosuke was about to yell at the man and ask him just who the hell he thought he was trying to get all cozy with his fox when Yahiko unexpectedly interrupted the movie yet again.

"Hey! I have seen this movie before!" Yahiko exclaimed and he pointed at a man on the screen, "Yeah! I remember now! I saw this in the theaters a while ago! That old guy's the killer! Yeah! I remember everything now! Hahahahaha! Jeez! I have such bad memory... By the way you guys, this is a horrible movie! The red headed girl escapes the killer guy and goes to Ireland or whatever and she adopts her friend's kid! And then the Johnny Depp dude commits suicide! It has a sucky ass ending!"

"What the hell, Yahiko?!"

"Shut up, you moron! They put your diaper on too tight?!"

"You just spoiled the movie!"

"Why can't you just be quiet for ten minutes?!"

"Duuuuuuude! That's two movies you've ruined already!"

"ORO?!"

"You sure are really noisy for such a little guy..."

"I guess we don't have to watch the rest then!" Misao exclaimed and everyone turned to stare at her, "Oh, well... I guess you guys already know the ending so might as well just turn it off... That would've been fun! It would be just like this one time at band camp, where we all had a camp fire and we weren't supposed to have a camp fire and I ate these funny mushrooms! I had no idea what they were, so I just kept eating and eating and nobody knew what I was doing and it was so funny! Oh and this one time...!"

"Oh dear God, kill me now!" Saito shouted and he ran up the stairs, slamming the door to his room shut and the entire house shook from the loud collision. Downstairs, everyone stayed silent, all quietly praying that Misao wouldn't continue with her stories and to prove that there really was a heaven after all, Misao shrugged her shoulders.

"Oh well! I guess that's over then! Come on, Yahiko, we've got to get started on those lessons of yours!" Misao said and she practically skipped her way to the stairs, but Yahiko remained where he was, rooted tot he spot by the curious stares from all his friends. Finally realizing that she was not being followed, Misao turned around and frowned at him and his disobedience. "Get over here, Bitch!" Misao shrieked, startling everyone with her harsh tone, but her face stayed as sweet as an angel as she continued happily skipping up the stairs with Yahiko close behind.

"Well... I better get going," Aoshi said as he grabbed his coat off the couch, "I'll see you later then. Thanks for the movie."

"No problem!" Megumi called after him, a bright smile on her face, "Come by and visit anytime you like!" Megumi walked over and gave her friend a hug, making Sanosuke cringe at the sight and he began to turn his head away when something in Aoshi's gaze caught his attention.

Turning back, Aoshi gave Sano a coy smirk, but it was gone in an instant when Megumi pulled away from what she thought was a friendly good-bye hug. Obviously, Aoshi had other ideas.

"Bye then!" She walked him to the door, much to Sanosuke's dismay, and he tried to keep his anger in, letting out a yelp when he realized that he had been clenching his fist so tight that he had made indents of his nails on his palm.

"I'm gonna go to our room now, Megumi," Kaoru said with a yawn and she began walking towards the stairs, "I'll see you up there." 

Kaoru and Megumi were required to share a room for lack of space and since Saito was not at all fond of the idea of Kaoru sharing a room with Kenshin, he had made sure that his sister room with Sanosuke's girlfriend. He didn't trust the red head and his weird tantra exercises.

"I'll walk you!" Kenshin exclaimed, a little overly excited to finally have some alone time with the girl that had conquered his every thought for the past year and a half, more than overjoyed that her over-protective older brother wasn't around to shove something in his face.

Kenshin followed her up and talked to her about old times, carefully avoiding the mention of any particular bar room game, such as pool. It was a sensitive subject that Kenshin was very shy about. Even the mention of the word pool, whether it involved Kaoru or not, made his face turn as red as his hair. 

Kaoru was the exact opposite. In fact, ever since that night at prom, she had insisted that she learn how to play pool; just for future reference. She made sure to make this a point to Kenshin as they made their way down the hall.

"So, Kenshin, do you know how to play pool?" Kaoru asked as casually as she could, her hands clasped in front of her as she steadily walked ahead of him with a slight bounce in her step.

The next thing Sanosuke and Megumi heard coming from upstairs was an overly loud exclaimed, "Oro?!" that could have only been Kenshin Himura himself. They both shook their heads at their friend in dismay and Megumi started to make her way upstairs, but Sanosuke caught her arm.

"I don't really like that Aoshi guy," Sanosuke blurted out. He knew he was being ridiculous, but he couldn't help it. That look Aoshi gave him earlier was definitely bothering him, that 'She's mine now' kind of look, and Sanosuke knew for a fact that Aoshi had wanted him to see it. Besides, a strong point in a relationship was honesty, right? So he thought it was best to just let her know how he honestly felt about her friend.

"Aoshi? Why not?" Megumi asked, puzzled by her boyfriend's opinion. She sure didn't see anything wrong with Aoshi, so what was Sanosuke's problem? "He's a perfectly nice guy."

"Well, yeah, sure, but you should've seen the way he gave me this look when he hugged you good-bye and all...," Sanosuke added, putting his hand behind his head at the awkward situation, "and then he like practically jumped outta his seat to go get you that water... I think he has a little crush on you or something..."

"Aoshi? Having a crush on me? He only thinks of me as a friend. Why would you think that he likes me?" Megumi asked, putting her hands on her hips, and suddenly the tiny corners of her ever-present fox ears appeared on the sides of her head, "Sanosuke, are you getting jealous?"

"Who? Me?! Jealous?! No, I'm not... uh... Well, you see..." Sanosuke stuttered. 'Damn! I'm not good at this crap,' he thought to himself, 'I can't even finish one measly little sentence!'

"That's it, you're just jealous! Hah! You've really outdone yourself this time, Rooster-Head! I'll tell you this now, Aoshi doesn't like me like that and even if he does, I don't like him that way. We're just friends!" Megumi tried to explain and she sighed, "I have no clue why you would think otherwise, but whatever your sources are, they're wrong. Aoshi and I are just friends. Period. You really shouldn't talk to Hajime so much, Sano, stupidity is contagious."

"But Fox, I....!" Sanosuke started to protest, but Megumi was already half-way up the stairs and in a matter of seconds, she closed the door to her room, obviously upset, "Damn it!!!"

  
  


A/N: So how was it? Sorry for not updating in a while but I was writing the "All I See Is Black And White" story of mine instead. Leave a review and I'll hopefully update faster!


	10. Conflict Rising

Chapter 9:

"Conflict Rising"  
  


"Okay, Yahiko, let's try this one more time," Misao encouraged, "come on, you can do this! Remember, you're doin' this for every single guy out there that has stubby little fingers! You're doing this for every guy in this entire universe that wants a second chance! You can't turn back now! You've already come so far!"

"Okay...I'm gonna do it..." Yahiko said and taking in a deep breath, he prepared himself for the worst.

Reaching around the pillow, his hand tugged gently on the bra clasp that surrounded the soft cushion and fiddled with it for a few brief but agonizing seconds. Yahiko bit down on his tongue, sticking it out to the side of his cheek as he continued with his eternal struggle between man and bra before it suddenly came off in a snap. Automatically, the purple bra fell onto the bed sheet and Misao hooted and hollered in celebration.

"Yay! You did it! You got my bra off!" Misao shouted excitedly, but immediately covered her mouth only a second later as she realized the what someone who didn't know what they were doing would think if they heard her yelling just now, "Whoops! I mean, um... woo hoo?" This time the word came out whispered and she twirled her hand around like a flag, making Yahiko laugh out loud.

"Hell yeah, I did!" Yahiko exclaimed, his voice booming against the walls and echoing through the entire beach house. He wanted to show her that he really didn't care if anyone heard them outside, even if what they thought he and Misao were doing was not happening at all, he didn't care what they thought. He wasn't embarrassed by her like he would have been if this had happened last year; now, his opinion of her had definitely changed from wanting to kill himself whenever she was around. "Yeah! I got your bra off!" Yahiko shouted again, making Misao smile, finally understanding what he was truly doing to calm her embarrassment, "Uh huh! Yahiko has got this shit DOWN! Oh yeah!"

Misao laughed. She was well aware by now that he was trying to show her that he wasn't ashamed of her and that made her happy. Besides, it was a well known fact that Yahiko had been in a whole lot more embarrassing situations than this. So pretty much, people thinking that the two of them were making out was really nothing compared to how mortified he was when he got caught with his hand glued to his crotch.

"You know what, Yahiko? I think we should take a break from lessons," Misao suggested as she got up from the bed to stand in front of him, "You've been doing really well lately, so how about we go out for something to eat as a reward? My treat for my bitch. What do you say?"

"Alright!" Yahiko exclaimed and he practically ran her over in his effort to get out the door before she did, but he paused and turned back, opening the door for her and making a polite bow in the doorway. "I mean.... Ladies first," he corrected. 

"Thanks!" Misao said, walking past him and down the stairs, Yahiko at her heels, "So where do you think we should go to eat then? Burger King? Jack in the Box? McDonald's? Taco Bell?" 

Misao and Yahiko stopped in their tracks as they heard the bounding footsteps coming down the stairs behind them and already knowing who it was, both stepped aside to let Kenshin speed by, his arms flailing about in front of him as he ran out the door. Not even a foot away, Saito chased after him with narrow eyes.

"Get back here, Shit-Break! Breaking your arm doesn't hurt... You'll barely even feel it!" Saito shouted as he chased after the red head, "After I break your neck that is! What the hell were you doing in Kaoru's room earlier?!"

"Ororororororororororororororo!" Kenshin shouted as he picked up his pace, flying right out the open door that Yahiko held open for him, obviously more favorable to his friend keeping some vital limbs attached to his body. But Yahiko quickly slammed the door shut before Saito could get out, causing the taller man to slam right into the door, face first. Slowly sliding down the door, Saito collapsed onto the ground from the impact and Yahiko and Misao stepped over him, never missing a beat in their conversation of where to go for lunch.

"Wendy's? Subway? K.F.C.?" Misao continued as Yahiko closed the door behind them, placing his hands in his pockets as he followed her out to the sidewalk, "Yahiko, are you listening to me?"

"Huh? Oh... Yeah, I was just thinking where we should go," Yahiko lied. Actually his mind was nowhere near food, he was really thinking about Tsubame. 

Was he prepared to see her now? Did he need more practice? Would he ever be good enough? Yahiko didn't know, but he wasn't about to ask Misao, she'd tell him he'd done enough and that if there was more he could do, he'd have to learn on his own. Yahiko sighed aloud, making Misao pause in her mentioning of various restaurants and she watched his shoulders sag down towards the ground. She pouted.

"Okay, ex-nay on Denny's then," Misao said, completely unaware that Yahiko wasn't even listening to her and she turned to the McDonald's in front of them, "let's just go here then, Yahiko!" Misao frantically grabbed his arm, snapping him out of his thoughts as she practically dragged him inside the eatery to stand in line next to her.

"Hi, welcome to McDonald's. Can I take your order?" 

"Hm, let's see... I'll have two bacon cheeseburgers, no onions, no pickles, extra cheese, but hold the ketchup, two large cokes, two extra large fries, two apple pies, and two onion rings, please," Misao told the man at the register and amazingly, he got it all down. Turning to Yahiko, Misao asked him, "And what do you want?" 

"HUH?!" Yahiko exclaimed, "All that's for you?! I thought that you were ordering for both of us!"

"It is for both of us, silly! I was only kidding!" Misao said, laughing at his surprised face and she turned to the register and paid the amount due, "Thank you." Misao then took Yahiko by the arm and led him over to a table, settling down in the seat across from him with their drinks.

"Thanks for paying," Yahiko replied, laughing nervously, "I'm uh... strapped for cash right now so it was really nice of you to pay for it all. I mean, ever since the super glue thing, I couldn't exactly borrow any money from Sano or Kenshin 'cause they already paid for the hospital and the whole money plan from painting that house totally went down the drain so..."

"Yeah, lesbians are pretty moody... Anyways... so what exactly were you trying to do with the super glue anyway?" Misao asked, making Yahiko jump in surprise at the question, "Aren't there always warning labels on the sides of those things?"

"Well yeah they do, but uh... I was kinda busy watching... stuff... at the moment and I didn't see it. I was trying to use lubricant," Yahiko whispered in a hushed voice, "I accidently grabbed the super glue I used to fix the lamp instead."

"Ooooooooh!" Misao said, nodding her head in understanding, "I thought you were just using it for the fun of it! 'Cause you know, some people are pretty weird when they're horny..."

"Eheheh.... yeah... some people..." Yahiko agreed, sweat dropping in his mind as he bit his lip to keep from mentioning all the bleeping bruises he got after they had sex the night of prom. Some of those never healed...

"No one told me the details of what happened..." Misao pressed on, sipping at her extra large coke, grabbing practically everyone's attention with the loud slurping noises that came out of the straw that were completely unnecessary, "What did they do once you were in the hospital?" 

Yahiko was a little reluctant to tell Misao, or anyone for that manner, about the whole 'unfortunate incident' with the super glue, but he had to hand it to her, she did pay for lunch. The very least he could do was answer her questions, embarrassing as they were. Besides, for the past few weeks, they had become so much closer and Yahiko was actually starting to consider her one of his best friends. 

She was just like one of the guys, only it was perfectly okay to get lessons from her. Yahiko would rather die before he went to go ask Kenshin how to be good in bed, the guy was probably just as clueless as he was. And there was also absolutely no way he was gonna ask Sanosuke. He would only gloat and brag about what he happened to do with his girlfriend and Yahiko didn't think it'd be very appreciated by Megumi. (Tsk tsk... If only she knew the kinds of things her boyfriend would say about what kinds of um... things they would do together when he was drunk...) 

Asking Saito was just plain out of the question. Yahiko cringed to even think about asking that jerk. Misao was his only safe bet. 

"Well, it was pretty embarrassing... first they had one doctor come in and he was looking at it for a while, then he said that he needed a whole bunch of other doctors to come in too. Pretty soon there were herds of guys in lab coats and they were all whispering back and forth, a few of them even poked me with these weird probe... thingies.... And some weird tourist lady passed by the window took a picture," Yahiko explained, taking a bite out of his burger, not even waiting to swallow before he began talking again and bits and pieces of burger sprayed out onto the table, "they hath toh uthe shumthin toh get ith offgh. I hadf no idea whot ith wath..." Finally, Misao was able to open her eyes as Yahiko finished chewing his food and the endless drops of ABC (already been chewed) burger stopped flying at her face. "They gave me some weird blue pill that made my mouth taste funny and the rest of it, I don't really remember, but when I finally got my head out of the clouds, I saw they had me wrapped up in some huge diaper whatchamacallit."

"So if you wanted to go to the bathroom, could you just go and not worry about it?" Misao asked, leaning over the side of the table to take a good luck at his lower region, making Yahiko sweat drop for what seemed to be the fifth time that day, "Just how much of that coke did you drink already, Yahiko?" Before Yahiko could protest to Misao's accusation of him going to the bathroom in his pants, despite the diaper, a loud yell was heard from the doorway.

"Yahiko!!!" a girl yelled from the entrance, drawing everyone in the entire restaurant's attention as the girl walked over to him, a broad smile on her face, "So here you are! I've been looking all over for you! I went over to your beach house and your friends said that you went out for lunch with someone so I decided to go look for you! You still remember me, don't you?"

"Tsubame! What... what are you doing here?! I thought you were coming next week!" Yahiko stuttered as he stood up from his seat with wide eyes, staring at the much awaited girl in front of him. 

If even possible, Yahiko thought she looked even more gorgeous than the last time he saw her, multiplied by a hundred! He completely forgot about the other female present behind him, who was still trying to regain composure after the initial shock of seeing the girl Yahiko was so much in love with and still trying to cover the hurt look on her face after realizing Yahiko's total obliviousness to her existence. 

Misao had prepared herself for seeing Tsubame and had dutifully readied herself to understand exactly what Yahiko saw in the girl, but she was in no way prepared for her to arrive so early. Interrupting their lunch was one thing that was a bit on the unexpected side, but the fact that her time spent with Yahiko was now officially coming to an end hit her like a hard blow to the stomach. She had trained him for just this, but somehow the idea of letting him carry on with his mission to be with Tsubame never really sunk in. Misao's head lowered, her chin practically touching her collarbone and her shoulders sagged low towards the ground as she continued to listen to the new couple's conversation that initially didn't include her.

"Yeah, I know, that was the plan! But the truth is, I was able to catch an earlier flight! Isn't that great?!" Tsubame asked, a bright smile playing across her lips which pulled back to reveal neat rows of perfect shining pearly white teeth.

"Yeah, it is, but uh.... you're a little early and I'm not ready... I mean! The party's not gonna be ready until Saturday. Yeah, the party! And we've got to prepare still," Yahiko answered nervously. 

If Tsubame wanted to do what was previously planned, he wouldn't be ready! Well... actually, Yahiko himself was more than ready for it, but his disgruntled groin was definitely not in the same boat as his mind was. Suddenly, his diaper started itching.

"Oh, that's okay though, right? I can just stay at the beach house until the party then! Is that okay?" Tsubame asked sweetly, not even noticing Misao sitting at the table still, her hands tightly gripping the edge of the seat as she tried to avoid making eye contact with the girl that had so easily captured Yahiko's heart.

"I guess that'd be okay... I mean, suuuuure! That'd be fine! We've got tons of room at the beach house! Uh... why don't you go meet me there and I'll just finish up lunch real quick, okay?" Yahiko suggested with a hand behind his head, a very bad habit he had developed from hanging out with Sanosuke so much.

"Okay! It was nice finally seeing you again, Yahiko!" Tsubame said enthusiastically and she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before walking out of the restaurant with about thirty guys ogling her as she walked by.

Yahiko didn't even realize that he had been holding his breath until he let it out in an exasperated sigh. He now had a big problem on his hands, or maybe we should say in his pants, and being the full on idiot that he was, Yahiko took the whole problem in as if the apocalypse was coming. He would have gone crazy if he weren't in such a public place so he kept his dignity, as little as he had to begin with, and cooly excused himself to the bathroom. 

Misao watched him go with curious eyes, the door's squeaky hinges creaking as it closed, and she heard an overly loud bang coming from inside the bathroom, followed by an exaggerated scream that nearly knocked her out of her seat.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh!" Yahiko shrieked as he pulled his throbbing hand back from where he had pounded it into the bathroom stall, "Mother of! Holy shit! Damn you, stupid door! Damn you, weak hand! Damn you, Mr. Sticky's super glue! Damn you, you worthless sorry excuse for a penis! Damn it! Damn it! DAMN IT! Now my diaper's itching again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Misao, as well as everyone else inside McDonald's all turned to stare at Yahiko as he exited the men's bathroom, his hand as red as Ronald McDonald's hair, but despite all the weird looks he received, he kept his head held high. Misao kept her mouth shut as he took his seat across from her again, his eyebrows creased together, indicating that he wasn't in any mood to talk, and he continued eating like nothing had happened. A few minutes later, everyone else followed suit.

"She's gonna wanna do stuff..." Yahiko said silently as he swallowed down his last bit of food, "and I'm not ready for it... I don't think that penis cream is working..."

"I know! I've got a great idea! You can be my boyfriend!" Misao exclaimed and at Yahiko's look of surprise, she whacked him over the head with her purse, "You dork! I meant that we're gonna tell Tsubame that! That way, if she thinks you have a girlfriend then she's not gonna wanna get in the sack with you anymore. Then, me and you can 'break-up' the day before the party and by that time the penis cream had to have worked!"

Several people turned to stare at them at Misao's more than personal information about Yahiko was revealed and she quickly covered her mouth to stop from saying anything else. Yahiko's eyes shifted from left to right and sure enough, everyone's eyes were on them. He smiled nervously, but he wasn't able to control the red color in his cheeks as he grabbed Misao by the arm and led her outside as quickly as possible. 

As soon as they were outside, he turned to face her.

"Alright, it's a good idea, but do you think you could lay off the whole penis cream thing? The last thing I need is for the whole world to know about it," Yahiko whispered as they steadily walked back towards the beach house, "Just promise you won't say the words 'penis cream' in the same sentence as my name, okay?"

"Okay, Yahiko! I promise I won't tell anyone else about you and your penis cream!" Misao exclaimed, jumping in the air at her promise, not at all realizing that she had already broken her word and Yahiko fell over. A few women passing by on their afternoon jog turned to stare at them and Misao, after taking note of this, only glared back. "What?! What?! Do you have a problem with me and my friend?! We're a private conversation here, you know! What are you still listening for?! Turn around! I'll have you know that my friend has a DIAPER wrapped around his PENIS right now because he SUPER GLUED himself to uh... himself!!! But that doesn't matter to you now, does it?! Because you don't have a penis! OR MAYBE YOU DO!"

Both women hurriedly walked away from the rude girl, crossing over to the other side of the street to get away from her wrath as Misao continued yelling at them and shaking her fists.

"Yeah! Walk away! Once his dick's all better, you'll see! YOU'LL ALL SEE!" Misao shouted, making about fifteen people in their cars turn and stare at her. 

While Misao continued on yelling at all the people that she was able to, Yahiko could only sigh and stand with her as her fake boyfriend. Anyway, what was a story without a good example? Even if Tsubame wasn't there or anywhere near there for that matter, Yahiko wanted to pretend they were together anyway, you know, just for fun, and he was careful not to bring it up to Misao; after all, he didn't want to interrupt her telling everyone in the world that he needed penis cream.  
  


Mina sat down in the lawn chair on the porch, the glare of the sun shining down on her as she tried to get her summer tan in her bathing suit; maybe I should mention that it was a bikini. She knew that getting a tan was practically impossible for her pale skin, but that wasn't exactly all she was going for here. 

You see, Kenshin was in the kitchen making breakfast and if Mina knew him at all, he was probably going to come outside and give everyone their food on a tray. She could only imagine what he'd think when he saw her 'tanning' herself on the front porch and she snickered at the thought of his oncoming nosebleed. However, he did seem to be taking a whole lot longer than usual to finish up making breakfast and Mina was growing tired of waiting for him. She didn't even notice Saito sitting next to her until his stomach growled.

"SHIT-BREAK! Where the hell is breakfast?!" Saito shouted at the top of his lungs. He hadn't eaten since yesterday and he was absolutely starving. It didn't really matter that he was ordering the red head around like he was his personal slave; Saito would have used the man as a foot stool if he could, but of course, Kaoru, being the softy she was, would never allow it. 

'Speaking of Kaoru, where the hell is she?' Saito wondered, but he discarded the thought as his stomach let out an even louder rumble and he automatically sat up from the lawn chair beside Mina. "Shit-Break! Are you messin' around with those eggs?! You touch mine and you die! I'm serious, you lay one finger on my eggs and I'm gonna rip you apart! Shit-Break?! You hear me?!"

"Hajime! Leave him alone! He's tantring right now!" Kaoru shouted from down on the beach and she threw the volleyball at her brother's head, hitting him with such force his head bobbed up and down a few times as if it were on a spring. Cursing out loud, Saito turned around and glared at her. "Kenshin needs to concentrate right now so he can save himself up for later. In Tantra, you can save up an orgasm until it's at it's highest point! And until that faithful moment when you can release it upon the world, you need to build up temperance! He's filling up to the brim!"

"That's fucking DISGUSTING!" Saito wretched with a nauseated frown and he turned to the door of the beach house with his cheeks flashing a bright shade of green, "Hey, Shit-Break! Forget about those eggs! I suddenly lost my appetite! I think I'll just eat some grass or somethin." Slowly, Saito got up as not to aggravate the rolling food in his stomach and he walked back towards the house, trying to clear his mind of what Tantra really was.  
  


Megumi and Kaoru giggled as they heard Saito gagging in his room and turned back to continue playing their volleyball game against Sanosuke and Aoshi. Kaoru had insisted that the game be boys against girls and at first the guys had refused. But after all the constant teases from the girls and several clucking chicken noises, they had reluctantly given in to being on each other's team. 

The game was currently four to one, girls lead, and they made sure that they rubbed in that fact in the guy's faces at least every two minutes.

"Alright, Megumi, you ready to kick these guys asses some more?" Kaoru asked as she turned her attention back to the game, "Or do you think we should let them rest for a little bit?"

"Yeah, they look a little worn out... Maybe we should let them rest. Poor guys, maybe it'd have been better if you had Kenshin join you too. That way it'd be three against two and you'd actually have a chance! Ohohohoho!" Megumi laughed, her fox ears popping up from the sides of her head and Kaoru's raccoon ears did the same.

"What?! We're just getting started! Don't get all cocky now, the game's not even over yet!" Sanosuke protested. It was bad enough that the girls were winning, even though he had been so positive that it would be the other way around by now, but then they had to just go and bury their faces in the sand about it. This only made him more determined to win. "We were just holdin' back on you!"

"Yeah riiiiiiiiiiight...." Kaoru said with a roll of her eyes, "Fine then, next team that makes a point wins the game!"

"Fine!"

"Let's go," Aoshi said, his eyes transfixed on the volleyball as Kaoru raised it high over her head and hit it with the palm of her hand, sending it flying over to their side of the court.

Aoshi and Sanosuke both ran for the ball, determined to get to it first before the other did, but both ended up knocking each other down in the process as they both bumped shoulders and fell to the ground. Time slowed down as the volleyball slowly made it's way down to the ground, only inches from the sand and Sanosuke and Aoshi watched as it made impact with a loud thud.

"Yay!" Kaoru shouted as she jumped up and down, slapping Megumi a high five, "We're number one! We're number one!"

"Jeez, you guys! That's the fourth time you've bumped into each other while trying to get the ball! I thought you'd put up a better game than that! What happened to 'We were just holding back on you'?" Megumi imitated her boyfriend and she laughed again, joining in on the ranting Kaoru started of, "We're number one! We're number one!"

"Why don't you watch where you're going next time?!" Sanosuke muttered as he sat up, shaking his head to get the sand out of his hair, "This is all your fault you know!"

"My fault?! You're the one that keeps going in on my side! I thought I told you that the left side was mine and the right side was yours!" Aoshi shot back as he dusted his chest off of the grains of sand that had found their way into the hard ridges of his muscles, "You keep moving in on my turf!" Aoshi's blue eyes turned even colder as he shot Sanosuke ice daggers through his pupils, the meaning of 'turf' definitely going farther than the idea of whose side was whose in the volleyball game and the complexity behind what Aoshi really meant was as clear to Sanosuke as a raindrop in early summer. 

"Stick to what's yours, Sagara, and I'll hold on to what's rightfully mine..." Aoshi said, his voice so thick with bitterness that you would have needed a chainsaw to cut through it and he got up to go congratulate the girls on their stunning victory.

Sanosuke balled his hands up into tight fists as he watched him walk over to Kaoru and Megumi, the icy glare now suddenly gone from his eyes as he spoke to them, mainly to Megumi, about how well they did at beating them. His eyes glowing an iridescent red, Sanosuke was about to knock the fake plaster smile off Aoshi Shinimori's face and permanently get rid of all his memory of ever setting eyes on HIS fox, when Kenshin decided to come out onto the deck at that moment with breakfast on silver trays, all finished.

"BREAKFAST! Sorry about the delay, everyone, the stove was giving me a little trouble, that it was," Kenshin explained himself as he set the trays down on the table beside Mina, his clothes slightly burnt at the edges. He didn't even glance at Mina's half-nude body as she had expected him to and she gave him a quizzical look from beneath her sunglasses. 

"Hey Kenshin," Mina practically purred, crossing one slim leg over the other in a provocative pose, "Do you like my new bikini?" She gave him a slow smile, curving her lips back to reveal perfectly lined teeth, but Kenshin never wavered.

"Oh! You got a new one, Mina? Hm, I didn't even notice, that I didn't," Kenshin replied, completely unaware of the fumes that had escaped from Mina's ears as she fought not to bash him over the head with the plate of food he had placed in front of her, "I think you look nice as you usually do anyway, that I do. Now, I made eggs for everyone! Who wanted scrambled?"

The voices around her seemed to be in the back of her mind as she drifted into some far off world, Kenshin's words echoing throughout her brain, 'I think you look nice as you usually do anyway, that I do.' 

'If he really meant that, then maybe I do have a chance with him...' Mina thought and she sighed contentedly, hugging herself at the warm thought of finally being able to hold Kenshin in her arms, completely unaware of all the weird looks she received from her friends who had all paused in their eating to stare at her. 

Cautiously, Saito returned from his room, the gagging feeling finally gone, and upon setting foot on the deck, he looked from Kenshin to Mina, who was still off in another world with her arms tightly hugging herself as she rocked back and forth, a devilish smile on her face.

"Jesus, Shit-Break! What the hell did you put in the eggs?!"  
  


A/N: So? Good? Bad? Okay? I think I'll put up a very well known advertisement. How's my writing? Dial 1-800- Review-ME! Or, to save yourself some more money from your phone bill, click the button at the end of the screen! Later!


	11. Inevitable Coming At You Again

Chapter 10:

"Inevitable Coming At You Again"  
  


Kenshin dipped the washcloth into the warm soapy water again, lathering it up with soap suds before he smoothed it over the dirty dishes, his official job for the summer. When the dishes were cleaned off of the remaining food and grime, he placed it in the other side of the sink for Megumi to rinse off. Humming, she picked the plate up and washed the bubbles off with the warm water from the faucet.

Mina and Kaoru were downstairs in the basement playing(what else?!) pool. Kaoru was pretty good at it, but she insisted that Mina teach her a few tricks so she could become even better. 

Mina gripped the pointer, aiming it at the red ball in the center and readied it to push the ball forward when Kaoru's shout startled her, causing her to thrust the stick into the table and ruin the green carpeting with a deep gash.

"Kenshin! You wanna play pool with us?!" Kaoru called from the basement and at hearing the horrible ripping sound of the table cloth, she turned to Mina, startled by the huge cut in the middle of the table, "Mina, why'd you mess up the table?"

"Whoops.... sorry," Mina apologized as she quickly tried to smooth over the big gash with her hand and she looked around for something to cover it with, "Uh.. Here we go!" Mina smiled and placed an overly large book over the cut on the table and Kaoru laughed at her sad resolution to the problem.

"I'll be there in a second, that I will!" Kenshin hollered back from the kitchen and he turned to Megumi with an apologetic smile, "Do you mind if I go to join them for a little while?"

"Go ahead, I can do the rest," Megumi said and they switched sides so that she could have easier access to the soap, "Have fun." Kenshin smiled in thanks and he bounded down the steps to the basement to play the game. 

Honestly, Kenshin had no idea how to play pool, but he figured that anything he set his mind to, he could do pretty good at it; besides, Kaoru was there and there was no way he was going to pass up an opportunity to spend some time with her. It was upsetting enough that he couldn't join them in their volleyball game earlier since he would have very much liked to see her in her bikini jumping around, so hopefully this would act as some kind of compensation. 

"Alright, you know how to play pool right, Kenshin?" Kaoru asked as she rubbed over the tip of the stick with the cue, "If you do then I won't have to hold back on you!"

"I think I can figure it out," Kenshin replied with a nervous smile and he took the stick from Kaoru, aiming it at one of the balls in the center. 

Biting down on his lip, he concentrated on how he was going to go about not making an idiot out of himself in front of Kaoru and took a deep breath before he struck it. Unfortunately, a little too hard, and the ball flew over the edge of the table, smacking Mina right between the eyes and she fell over unconscious. 

"ORO?! Mina, are you alright?!" Kaoru and Kenshin ran over to her side, the red ball still attached to her forehead, her eyes shut closed.

"Here, help me get her over to the couch," Kaoru instructed as she lifted up Mina's arms and gestured for Kenshin to take hold of her ankles. Carefully, they carried her over to the couch across the room, both of them straining under her weight, "Okay, she is not one hundred and fifteen pounds!" Kenshin would have laughed if he wasn't struggling with Mina so much and both of them were finally able to got her over to the cushions and they heaved her onto it with a big sigh. 

"Whew! That was like an entire body workout!" Kaoru said as she wiped the sweat from her brow and leaned on the wall nearby to help her stand, "Well, you could've told us you were that bad at pool."

"I'm sorry, that I am. Do you think we should get her some ice for her head?" Kenshin asked as he watched Mina dozing off on the couch in front of them and in her sleep, she hugged herself again and Kenshin and Kaoru exchanged confused glances, "On second thought, maybe we should just leave her and her thoughts alone..." 

Kaoru nodded in agreement and they both made their way over to the pool tables again, leaving Mina alone on the couch with her dreams. Kaoru smiled as she handed Kenshin the stick again.

"Give it another go," Kaoru encouraged as Kenshin gladly accepted the stick from her and readied it on the table edge, "Oh wait, wait, wait!" Kenshin paused, confused as she turned around and fumbled through a large box in the corner of the room. After throwing about a few things, Kaoru finally came upon what she was looking for and with a big thumbs up to Kenshin, she came back to the pool table, this time with a football helmet on her head, just in case.  
  


Saito, Sanosuke, and Aoshi sat in front of the television, completely bored out of their minds, Sanosuke with the remote control in his hands, flipping through the millions and millions of channels they had, but found nothing. It wasn't that there wasn't anything interesting on TV, it was mostly that he was just too angry with Aoshi being in the house still that he was only concentrating on how he was planning on getting him as far away from his girlfriend as possible.

Saito eyed the stairs to the basement suspiciously, listening for the sounds of people playing pool, but he heard nothing. 'This can't be good...' he thought, remembering that only a few minutes ago, Kenshin had gone downstairs to join Mina and his sister in the pool game, and the silence was starting to make him think they weren't really playing anymore.

"Hey! I don't hear you playing pool!!!!" Saito shouted from the couch, "You better not be doing what I think you are, Shit-Break! Touch the sister and you die!" The sound of ceramic balls hitting against each other only a second after signaled that they were now playing the game and Saito smiled in approval. "That's better!"

Suddenly, Sanosuke and Saito's attention drifted over to Aoshi as he stood from his seat and walked over to the kitchen without saying a word. Both men leaned over to the sides to peer into the doorway and watched as Aoshi stood beside Megumi and asked her if she needed any help with the remaining dishes. To Sanosuke's disappointment, she moved over to give him some room next to her and smiled.

"Aw, thanks Aoshi! That's really nice of you!" Megumi said as he turned on the faucet to rinse off the dishes she had placed in the other side of the sink, "Is there nothing good on TV or something?"

"Not really. I just felt like helping you out," Aoshi replied cooly as he rinsed off the plates and dried them off with the nearby towel, "you looked pretty lonely doing these all by yourself anyway. I thought you could use some company as well."

Sanosuke made a low growl in the bottom of his throat, the color rising to his face as his blood boiled inside his veins, threatening to burst. "Stupid.. no... good.. Who does he think he is... Mother.... freakin'.... damn bastard...." he grumbled under his breath more incoherent words that Saito didn't catch, but the basic jist was that he just plain didn't like Aoshi... at all. His eyes narrowed as he watched Aoshi smile down at his fox in a manner not exactly the way just a friend would. 

Saito snickered at his current state and clicked off the TV. There was no one watching it anyway since the real live show was going on in the kitchen.

"You're a moron," Saito muttered as he struck a match against the box, lifting it up to his cigarette to light it and he drew in a content breath, exhaling the smoke out of mouth in a small circle shape.

"What'd you say?!" Sanosuke asked angrily as he turned his anger out on the insolent man next to him, "I really hate you, Saito, you know that?!"

"Well, at least I'm not the one macking on your girlfriend," Saito answered, holding the cigarette to his lips firmly, "I think you've got to concentrate your hate on someone else right now, you moron."

"Quit calling me that! If I'm such a moron, why don't you tell me what I gotta do to get that bastard away from my girlfriend!" Sanosuke muttered, his eyes drifting from glaring at Saito to glaring at how Aoshi was standing way too close to Megumi in the kitchen and his eyes flashed crimson at the sight of their hands brushing against each others. 

What made the situation a little better was when Megumi started singing their song from the choir competition last year. To Sanosuke, it was like a symbol of what he and Megumi had, but the symbol broke apart when Aoshi started singing along with her.

"Aoshi, I didn't know you could sing!" Megumi exclaimed with a bright smile, "You're pretty good at it."

"I bet she knows a couple other things he's good at too," Saito murmured in the background, making Sanosuke even more frustrated than before and he clenched his fists into tight balls, preparing to go over and knock the suggestive smile off Aoshi Shinimori's face, or actually, knock out all his teeth. Knowing Sanosuke, Saito knew exactly what he planned to do and he sighed, shaking his head at him. "I wouldn't do that if I were you, moron..."

"Didn't I just tell you not to call me that?!" Sanosuke raged, his anger rising at the forbidden insult that Saito preferred to name him as. 

If Saito wasn't such a bad ass, Sanosuke's tone would have felt threatening, but since that wasn't the case, Saito was in no way intimidated. 

"Damn it, what is this?! 'Let's-all-get-on-Sanosuke's-nerves-day'?! Now, move out of the way so I can tie that guys vocal chords in knots!" Sanosuke snapped, but Saito pulled him back with one easy throw, sending him back into his seat on the couch with a thud.

"You moron. You actually think that kicking his ass is gonna help you out any? Don't you ever use that thing in your head called a brain? That guy's her friend, you kick his ass right now and she's gonna throw a hissy fit!" Saito spat as he took in one last puff of smoke from his cigarette before he put it out in the ash tray nearby, "I know that guy. He's rich, and I'm not talking about 'he-can-carry-himself' kind of rich, I'm talking about 'my-wallet-can't-fit-another-damn-thing' kind of rich. That guy can sue the shirt off your back if he wanted to! The next thing up that guy's sleeve is to shower your girlfriend with expensive crap that you can't get her. And if I know anything about women, they all fall to your knees if you give 'em a piece of jewelry and that Aoshi guy can definitely afford some pretty big ass jewels. Megumi's gonna be groveling at his feet in no time, make no mistake about that. You just wait 'til he whips out the green, then it's all over." With a sigh, Saito pulled out another cigarette and lit it with his last match.

"Well, that's not gonna happen," Sanosuke said confidently. 

It didn't matter to him how much money Aoshi had or the size of jewelry he could buy. If Aoshi had so much already to begin with, why did he have to try and take Megumi? True, Sanosuke himself couldn't afford that kind of stuff and it never really mattered to Megumi in the first place if he could get her nice things or not, just what he had was always enough. So why was this whole money thing bothering him so much? 

Megumi wasn't shallow and she looked for what really made a person instead of what the person made, but somehow the whole idea of looking past a huge diamond seemed to get in the way of the previous theory. If he couldn't buy her a big rock strung on scrap metal, he could at least take her out to dinner or something. Special treats like that from him were rare, but in this case, Sanosuke felt it was necessary. 

"Hey Fox! Can I talk to you for a second over here?" he called and Megumi turned away from Aoshi for a moment, drying her hands off with a towel before heading over to him.

"Sure, what's going on?" Megumi asked as she stood before him, her hands still holding the damp towel and she flung it over her shoulder, "Did you need something?"

"No, I was just thinking... Why don't we go out to eat right now? My treat," Sanosuke offered, giving her his best smile as bait and he stole an evil glare at Aoshi, who was watching them from the kitchen with his arms folded across his chest.

"Now? Oh, well, that would have been fun, Sano, but I already promised Aoshi that I'd go for a ride with him in his new car," Megumi said, pushing a strand of hair that fell into her eyes and she saw Sanosuke's mouth twitch at the corners as he tried not to scream, "I'm sorry. I would, but I already promised him and I can't break it. It would've been really fun though. Some other time would be better. Like how 'bout we go..." 

"Ready to go?" Aoshi asked, accidently-on-purpose cutting her off before she could make a rain check for dinner with Sanosuke and he pretended that he hadn't meant to interrupt their conversation. Megumi was fooled, but Sanosuke and Saito saw right through his fake act of innocence and they both rolled their eyes at how obvious he was being and what a horrible actor he was. To their surprise, Megumi didn't catch on.

"Yeah, you have your car ready?" Megumi asked, turning back to her friend and she tossed the dish towel aside to the couch, "That was quick."

"Hang on, let me check," Aoshi said and he pulled out his cell phone from his pocket and dialed a number. Bringing the phone up to his ear, he spoke to the person on the other end, "Yeah, hey, I'm done. Oh, you're outside? Okay, thanks." Aoshi turned to Megumi, giving her a thumbs up in response to her question and he clicked off the phone. "Alright, it's outside. You ready?"

"Yeah. Now, let's go see this car!" Megumi exclaimed excitedly, making Sanosuke cringe at just how enthusiastic she was to go and he and Saito followed them both to the door to check out the new car. 

Everyone except Aoshi made a loud gasp at the sight of the car; a black Lamburgini Diablos. Even Saito was surprised, his mouth hanging open so wide that a freight train could have gone through and his cigarette fell to the ground. 

All Sanosuke could think was that Saito had been right. Aoshi had already started giving Megumi what he couldn't and he just had to start with a ride in his brand new convertible. Next to Sano's beat up old jeep, it was like a baby kitten sitting next to a ferocious man-eating lion. No competition.

"Oh my God! That's your new car?!" Megumi exclaimed, the first one to react to the shiny new convertible, Saito and Sanosuke's mouths still hanging down about an inch from the ground, "WOW! I can't believe I get to ride in that!"

"That's not the only thing she's gonna get to ride," Saito murmured in the background as he suddenly regained his composure and Sanosuke shot him a malevolent look.

"Did you say something, Hajime?" Megumi asked curiously, not quite catching what he had said because of her distraction with the car. Saito only shrugged his shoulders and Megumi sighed, turning around to face the car again. "I call shotgun!" she said and was about to hop in the car when she remembered her boyfriend, "Oh, Sano, I'll be back soon, okay? It won't take too long! B.... whoa!" Megumi didn't even get to finish the word "bye" but she was able to wave before Aoshi slammed his foot on the gas pedal in an effort to get away from the house as soon as possible before Sanosuke could say any word of response. 

Saito and Sanosuke were left in the driveway covered in dust and they both spit out the dirt that had managed to get into their mouths.

"Looks like you're not exactly Lady Luck's favorite person to visit, huh?" Saito snickered as he walked away, dusting himself off of the dirt that had flown onto him from Aoshi's speedy exit, "That moron ruined my new shirt! Forget anything I said about not kicking his ass! Do what you have to 'cause if you don't, Megumi's already gone to you." Saito swore aloud as he tried again to get the dirt of his shirt, but to no avail and he grumbled under his breath that if Sano needed any help kicking Aoshi's ass, he'd definitely jump at the chance. 

Saito walked off into the house, leaving Sanosuke in the dusty mess. But the mess in the driveway was nothing compared to all the jumbled up thoughts running through his head at that moment. Megumi was practically gone, and in a whole different way other than a couple miles distance.  
  


"Kenshin! I already told you! It's like this!" Kaoru sighed, getting frustrated with his slow understanding of how to hit the ball correctly and she bent over the table one last time to show him. To tell the truth, Kenshin wasn't at all paying attention to how she angled the pool cue or how she aimed at the targeted ball, he was much more interested in watching her bend over the table so he could take a good long look at her rear end without her even knowing it. The best part about it was that she kept showing him, therefore giving him multiple opportunities to check out the "merchandise." 

Kaoru straightened up again, signaling Kenshin that she was about to turn around and he tore his gaze away from her ass to look up at her face and he flashed her his trademark innocent rurouni smile.

"Thank you, Kaoru, it was a VERY good demonstration, that it was," Kenshin said and he took the cue that she handed to him, still having no more insight on how to play as he first did before even coming downstairs. 

He angled the cue to the white ball, aiming it carefully before he struck it hard, sending it flying over the table for the third time in a row. Neither Kaoru or Kenshin noticed that Mina had just woken up from her unconscious state, sitting up to view her surroundings, only to be hit with an oncoming ball yet again. She fell back down onto the couch without Kaoru or Kenshin even knowing it and again, she went back into her dreams of holding Kenshin in her arms and she tightly hugged herself in her sleep. Kenshin and Kaoru only turned around to look at her, seconds after she plopped back down on the couch from being hit again, totally missing that she had gotten up so recently.

"It seems Mina has been out for quite a while, that it does," Kenshin replied as he watched the young girl continue to sleep soundly in the exact same place they had put her.

"Yeah, I know. I guess she hit her head harder than we thought," Kaoru added, looking sorrowfully at her friend who was still in no condition to play pool with them. She was getting pretty tired of playing with Kenshin because he never seemed to be learning how to play better at all, in fact, she thought he was getting worse. Of course she wouldn't tell him that, but she was getting lonely for some good competition.

"Hey guys! Mind if we join you?" Yahiko asked as he came down the stairs with Misao under his arm, Tsubame following a little behind, still shocked from their news that Yahiko and Misao were together and she walked like a dense robot over to one of the pool tables they stopped at.

"Sure! Go ahead! Just watch out for Mina on the couch, alright? She got uh... she tripped and fell earlier so she's just resting on the couch," Kaoru lied. She had been about to tell them about how bad Kenshin was at pool when he had given her a pleading look, she had quickly made up a different story, for his sake. "Yahiko, what's going on? Are you and Misao going out now or something?" Kaoru asked, noticing for the first time how close they were standing to each other and that Tsubame looked a little left out of the tight embrace.

"Yup!" Misao exclaimed and she slapped Yahiko on the ass as if to prove herself right and Yahiko jumped up in surprise, giving everyone a nervous, but agreeing smile, "He's my bitch!"

"Yes, they're going out... it's lovely, everyone's happy... La di da!" Tsubame replied sarcastically, her feelings still hurt by the unexpected announcement that Yahiko already had a girlfriend. It didn't help at all that Misao was such a dork and how Yahiko preferred her over Tsubame, she was left totally in the dark about. 

Yahiko sensed her sadness and he wanted so much to go over to her and tell her it was all a lie, but he couldn't. He had to stay true to the plan and carry it out; besides that, Misao's grip on his rear was not loosening and there was no way he could have moved an inch, unless of course, he wanted to have a huge chunk of his butt missing. 

"Oro? But Yahiko, I thought you wanted to..." Kenshin began, but Yahiko nervously laughed out loud, his hand behind his head as he hinted that he did not want Kenshin to finish his sentence. He did want to get with Tsubame, but now was not the time. He wasn't ready and he still had a few more days for using the medicine the doctor gave him until he could actually do anything.

"Eheh... Yeah, well! Are we gonna shoot some pool or what?!" Yahiko asked, quickly changing the subject before anyone could object and he grabbed the pool cue, readying it to hit the ball and he thrust it forward. Misao, not wanting to miss an opportunity to act as his girlfriend would, pinched his nipples at that same moment and the ceramic ball flew off the table.

"Huh? What happened...?" Mina murmured groggily, her eyes still half-closed as she sat up from the couch. But her eyes suddenly widened when she realized a huge red ball coming straight for her and she gulped back down her saliva in fear. "Uh oh..." 

The ball smacked her right in the middle of her forehead for the third time that day, sprawling her back onto the couch with a huge red bump ascending from the spot of impact. Worst part about the situation was that no one in the room seemed to notice as Mina fell back down on the pillows, unconscious yet again. You can just imagine the size of her headache by the time she woke up again...

"So Yahiko, when did you and Misao start going out?" Kenshin asked, ignoring the missing red ball as he leaned on his stick like a cane. Without warning, the stick snapped from under his weight, sending him to the ground with an exclaimed, "Oro?!" But Kaoru was able to catch him in time, throwing her arms around him and she sent them both flying onto the pool table, her lying on top of him.

A low whistling was heard as someone started down the steps to the basement. Their footsteps got louder as the person neared them inch by inch until his form appeared at the bottom of the stairs. A puff of smoke coming out of his mouth was an obvious notification of who it was.

"Hey, I just thought I'd join you morons in a game of pool since I had nothing better to do and..." Saito began, but he stopped talking when he saw both Kenshin and Kaoru on the pool table, Kenshin on top of Kaoru, both too shocked to speak. Kaoru had one leg wrapped around Kenshin's waist and her hands were sprawled over his back. Kenshin had his hands on her shoulders and his mouth hung open at the sight of Saito standing before them. 

What disgusted Saito the most was that Yahiko, Misao, and Tsubame were all there too, just standing around and watching them like it was no big deal. To top it all off, Mina was lying down on the couch, hugging herself and talking in her sleep. To say that Saito was angry was an insult, to say that he was possessed by a demon didn't really reach the bar. 

"GET THE FUCK OFF MY SISTER, SHIT-BREAK!" Saito shouted and he ran forward, pushing over dozens of chairs in the process, but none of them seemed to slow him down and his hands outstretched before him.

"ORO?!" Kenshin cried as he jumped off Kaoru with a big jumble of legs and arms, pulling away from her so that he could avoid the powerful wrath of her brother, Hajime Saito.

"Get back here, you little fucker! What the hell are you doing that for in front of them?! No, what the hell are doing THAT for in the first place?! What the hell is wrong with you?!" Saito shouted as he chased after Kenshin around and around the room, Kenshin somehow able to avoid his claws by mere centimeters.

"Saito! Please! You should calm down, that you should!" Kenshin hollered, turning back to run around the pool table again, keeping the biggest distance he could manage between him and Saito, "If I was going to sleep with her, I would have done it in private, that I would!"

"That's it!" Saito shrieked and he was about to push the table forward and hit him down when Kenshin jumped up in the air. He kicked the table on it's edge, sending it flying backwards, hitting Saito instead and the man fell over unconscious with a dozen Kenshins floating around his head in circles like dizzy birds, singing all the while, "Ororororororororo!"  
  


A/N: Haha! A little more K/K for you ppl out there that were getting a bit restless! Hope you liked it! Sorry if some of the characters were OOC, but yunno, if they weren't the story wouldn't be as interesting! Leave a review please!


	12. Making Up And Breaking Up

Chapter 11:

"Making up and Breaking up"  
  


Sanosuke sat on the porch, hunched over so that his head rested peacefully in his hands, his knees drawn up to his body, and for the fourth time in what seemed to him to be an hour, he checked his watch. But he only discovered that the time hadn't changed from the last time he had checked. The hour was still eight o'clock and fourteen minutes and Megumi was still not back from her drive with Aoshi that had begun at about three in the afternoon. Three twenty-four to be exact; Sanosuke had counted. 

Sanosuke's ears perked up at the sound of an oncoming car, but he ended up being even more disappointed as the car kept moving down the street. 'Not Fox,' he thought to himself and his thought was immediately followed up with a shiver from the cold, but he was just too stubborn to go inside and wait. No, he wanted to be there when she arrived so he could make sure that Aoshi wasn't doing anything Sanosuke didn't like. He would hate to miss a chance of punching his face in if he even so much as looked at Megumi in any way Sanosuke thought was suggestive. 

'Where the hell is she?!' he thought frantically, checking his watch again, but the time seemed to be against him as only a minute had passed, 'Damn it! There's only so many places you could go at this hour with a pocket full a cash! That bastard's probably just throwing money at her! No doubt he got that car in the nick of time... He's like seriously plotting against me, I just know it! Probably whisking her away in some kind of fancy ass carriage or mile long stretch limo to some snazzy hotel in Hawaii... That jerk! He's blinding her with jewels right about now, I can practically see it! And what would Fox do? Narrow Eyes couldn't be right about that whole "women groveling at your feet with just a hint of something shiny" thing, right? No! Fox isn't like that! She'd throw that stuff back in his face and... Aw, who am I kidding?! She's probably flashing off some diamond to the pope right now and any minute I'm gonna be getting some fancy little choir singing to me to announce their wedding! No! Stop thinking that! What's wrong with you?! You're letting Saito get to you! But still, some of what he says is really reasonable... Stop it! Money isn't important in a relationship! Yeah, I may be thinking that, but then again, there is that one quote: Whoever thinks that money is in any way related to the Devil, doesn't have it. Pick me up and turn me upside down and not even lint would fall out!' Sanosuke was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn't even notice the approach of the very person he had been enduring the cold night waiting for.

Megumi stood in front of him, watching his face as it grew pensive, then stern, then pensive again; she had trouble remembering another time when he had been so caught up in his thoughts and she smiled, taking a seat next to him.

"What are you doing out here all by yourself, Sano? And without a jacket? You could catch pneumonia, you know," Megumi said, concern written all over her face as she noticed the unmistakable blue color of his lips and she gently touched his shoulder.

"Where the hell have you been?!" Sanosuke demanded, suddenly realizing her presence and he stood up and faced her as if she had run off for ten years to the market down the street and never came back, "You said it wouldn't take long! Five hours seems like a pretty long ass time to me! What were you two doing this whole time?!"

"Alright, calm down, Sano. I told you, we went for a little drive around," Megumi answered, not liking his tone one bit and she tried to approach the situation calmly, but Sanosuke obviously had other ideas.

"What?! To America and back?! Fox, a little drive around shouldn't have taken five hours and..." Sanosuke looked at his watch, "and twenty-two minutes! Where did you guys go?! I was waiting here for you to come back for five freakin' hours! What could you do on a little drive around?!"

"So we drove a little farther than I thought," Megumi explained, raising her hand over her head and twirling it in a circular motion, "I didn't realize it was so late until it started getting dark. We made a couple stops in town and grabbed a bite to eat over at some restaurant Aoshi recommended. I didn't think it'd take that long... Why didn't you wait inside where it was warm? You could have at least gotten some kind of jacket or something. Look, your lips are blue!"

"I'll be fine," Sanosuke muttered, not in the mood for changing the subject and he brushed the thought away; he was more interested in why it took more than five hours to make a couple stops and eat, "Why did it take you so long to do a little shopping? Did you stop at every store you passed by or what? Was the restaurant he recommended expensive? What else did that jerk buy you? Did he make a move on you? Why did you have your cell phone off?"

"What are you interrogating me for?! I already told you, I didn't realize it was so late until I saw how dark it was outside," Megumi replied, her hands on her hips as she answered every question he had asked her in perfect precision and order, "No, we did not stop at every store we passed by, the restaurant he recommended was not expensive although some things on the menu were, Aoshi is not a jerk, he was just being nice to me. No, he did not make a move on me the entire time we were out and my cell phone wasn't on because I forgot it in my room upstairs. Sanosuke, what on EARTH has gotten into you?!"

"Are you sure he didn't try anything on you?" Sanosuke asked, ignoring her question like he didn't even hear it, "I mean, are you absolutely positive that he didn't try to make a move on you in any way?"

"And just what are you trying to imply?!" Megumi asked angrily, standing up from her seat on the stairs and she didn't even blink when she stared up at him with a look of defiance that proved her power and courage, "You think that I was off fooling around with him, don't you?! You actually think that I'm cheating on you, is that it?!" At Sanosuke's silence, a dead giveaway that what she said was exactly what he had been thinking, Megumi threw her arms in the air in exasperation as the fire in her eyes burned hotter. 

"Oh. My. God! I can't believe I'm actually having this conversation with you! This is crazy! You actually think that I would CHEAT on you?! You... you... I don't think idiot even covers it! Don't you trust me at all?! I was away from you in America for three weeks, I was away from you at college for nine months and now when you see me everyday and are practically with me every moment, NOW you accuse me of cheating on you?! You have to stop saying all that bullshit about Aoshi just because you feel threatened!"

"I do not feel threatened!" Sanosuke lied. It was pitiful, even he knew that and there was no way Megumi didn't see past it. He never really was a good liar in the first place.

"Don't you lie to me, Sanosuke Sagara!" Megumi shouted as she thrust a box into his arms and snarled at him sarcastically, "Here! Thanks for the very warm welcome back!" Without another word, she spun on her heel and ran towards the beach house before Sanosuke could even move.

Puzzled at the box she had placed so roughly in his hands, he opened it up to reveal a few take-out boxes of food with his name on it and the aroma of fish, rice, and beef stew filled his nose. Megumi had taken the initiative to get him all his favorite dishes while she was away. 

He sighed, hanging his head down in shame and looked back at the door which was now slammed shut. He took the food inside, forgetting the rumbling in his stomach as he placed the take-out boxes in the refrigerator by the empty carton of milk, and trudged his way up the stairs. 

Silently, he opened the door to Megumi's room, his head lowered as he looked over to where she had thrown herself on the bed. Everyone's voices from down in the basement were heard, indicating that the door had been opened, but still Megumi didn't move from her tiny ball under her covers. Sanosuke walked over smoothly, the carpet creaking under his feet as he sat down on the edge of the bed and he looked over his shoulder to see her holding onto a picture of them in a frame, stroking the glass softly and leaving tiny fingerprints on the front. 

Megumi was completely aware of his presence, but she ignored him anyway. She was going to make the big shithead talk to her first.

"Megumi, it's not that I don't trust you. I do trust you, it's just that guy I don't trust. And it's not just that I feel threatened by him or anything like that, there's more to it. I know this sounds stupid but, there's something about him that gives me the creeps, but I don't know what it is," Sanosuke said quietly, the room so silent that he thought he could have died from suffocating, "You're right, idiot doesn't cut it when it comes to me, but still I can't help but think that this Aoshi guy isn't on my good side right now. It's a bad vibe I keep getting and I can't ignore it 'cause I'm worried about you. I'm sorry about all the stuff I said, I was just overreacting 'cause I had no idea where you were and I guess I just let myself get carried away..." Sanosuke let out a breath. That just had to be one of the hardest things he had ever said in his entire life; apologies weren't exactly his best subject.

There he went, scratching his head again and he was silent. Megumi sat up, knowing fully well that although he was being a little suspicious, his intentions were good and she smiled at the fact that he had been able to swallow at least some of his pride and say he was sorry. Placing the picture frame of them back onto her dresser, she put her arms around his shoulders, pulling him down next to her against the covers and she kissed his cheek.

"Yes, you did get carried away, but apology accepted, Rooster-Head," Megumi said as she hugged him to her, which actually seemed to be the most intimate thing they'd done since she came back from her trip to America, "you should know that I would never do that to you, Sano, despite whatever the hell Hajime Saito has been telling you. But I guess I can understand where you're coming from. If it were me in your shoes, I think I'd probably react the same way you did. Still, bad vibes or not, I'm not going to stop being friends with Aoshi, you know." Sanosuke let out a groan. "But! I promise you that I will keep my eyes peeled for anything suspicious, okay? Sound good?" At his nod, Megumi sighed. "You know, you're not so much of an idiot when you apologize..."

"Does this mean I don't have to go sleep in the dog house?" Sanosuke asked, reveling in the fact that she was no longer mad at him and he instantly turned back to teasing her.

"Don't push it," Megumi warned, but when he started to obey her and head outside, not really catching onto the teasing tone in her voice, she pulled him back down to her and put her arms about his neck, gently placing her lips on his to show him her last statement was a joke. She giggled when he gave her a shocked face. She just loved catching him off guard like that.

"I didn't say go," she whispered against his lips as she slowly pulled him down under the covers with her, the most devious smile on her face, "besides, I'm sure the doghouse won't mind if I keep you here for a little while..." 

(A/N: Doesn't everyone just LOVE make-up sex? ^^)  
  
  
  


"Nice shot, Ugly!" Yahiko exclaimed as Kaoru straightened up from getting the ball in the pocket. This time, her horrible nickname didn't seem to insult her, not with the compliment along with it anyway and she smiled at him in thanks. If he hadn't followed the name with a pleasing compliment, Kaoru surely would have broken her pool cue over Yahiko's head by now and suspecting just that, Yahiko hid behind Misao as he waited for the impact of wood to his scalp. 

"Don't worry, Yahiko, I'm not gonna hit you this time," Kaoru said with a laugh, "but don't expect the same treatment if I hear you call me that again."

"Yeah whatever, UGLY. You know you just can't lay a finger on me!" Yahiko taunted and he moved from his cowering placed behind his 'girlfriend' to stick his tongue out at Kaoru, "You wouldn't be able to even touch me, let alone whack me on the head with that stick!"

"What was that?! I'll show you just how bad I can hurt you!" Kaoru shouted and she lunged for Yahiko, pool cue raised over her head, but Kenshin pulled her back before she could give him even one concussion, "Hey Kenshin! What's the big idea?! Just lemme wack him once!"

"Please, Kaoru, you need to calm down, that you do," Kenshin tried to reason with her, but she still struggled in his grasp as Yahiko continued to taunt her, and adding to the difficulty of holding her back, Yahiko began singing his favorite song, "Can't touch this!"

"Will you morons shut up already?" Saito grumbled as he held an ice pack to his head, still throbbing from earlier when he fell over, "I've got a big enough headache already without you monkeys running around! Go get yourselves a movie to watch or something... Draw on them coloring book-thingies or watch that fucking purple dinosaur on TV, I don't care, just shut up! And Shit-Break! Go make some food! Make yourself useful for once!"

"I can cook!" Kaoru volunteered, but Saito only stuck out his tongue in disgust at the very thought of eating Kaoru's cooking, followed by excessive gagging from Misao, Kenshin, and Yahiko. Kaoru sneered at all of them and her grip on the pool cure tightened so that her knuckles turned white and she smacked them with it with all her might. "HYAH!!!"

"OW!"

"What the hell?!"

"What was that for, Ugly?!"

"ORO?!"

"You should all be thankful that I cook for you! One day, I'm gonna become a famous chef and people from all different countries will come to eat at my restaurant!" Kaoru announced with a sigh, her blue eyes sparkling as if she had already drifted off into another world, "They''ll all come to try my food that will become famous around the whole world..."

"Yeah, all the people with a death wish!" Yahiko exclaimed and ducked just in time to avoid getting hit again with the stick Kaoru still had in her hands, "Hey! Watch it!"

"I don't think there's anything wrong with Kaoru's cooking," Tsubame said quietly, but no one seemed to hear her from the loud commotion Kaoru and Yahiko made as she hit him numerous times over the head with the pool cue. Suddenly, they both stopped and turned to look at her with shocked expressions.

"REALLY?!" they both asked in unison, Kaoru's grip on the collar of Yahiko's shirt loosening a bit and she dropped him on the floor as if he were last week's newspaper.

"Jeez! What killed your taste buds?" Misao muttered, her opinion of Tsubame suddenly changing from the goddess that Yahiko claimed her to be to the average looking girl with no taste for good food. Misao was then picked up by an angered Kaoru and shaken vigorously as her punishment for insulting her cooking yet again.

"Her taste buds are fine! It's all of you that have horrible taste in food! My cooking is as good as it gets!" Kaoru protested, letting go of Misao when she was satisfied that the girl was so dizzy that she couldn't stand on her own two feet and Misao stumbled around the room for a few seconds before she collapsed into Yahiko's arms. 

Tsubame frowned as Yahiko gently propped Misao back up, her arm around his shoulders for support and it seemed to Tsubame that Yahiko was making a very big mountain of a molehill the way he held her so tightly around the waist. 

What confused Tsubame even more was that Misao wasn't even very pretty, at least not compared to her anyway. She thought Misao was plain and boring and she had no clue how Yahiko would prefer a dull girl like Misao over a knockout like her. There certainly didn't seem to be anything really special about Misao that Tsubame could see, but somehow Yahiko had the plain girl in his arms, and not her. She sighed in defeat. Losing to a loser was the hardest thing to admit, especially since she was so used to men kissing the ground she walked on and Tsubame doubted that any man had ever gone completely bonkers over Misao's looks. 

Standing next to Misao, Tsubame felt she reigned over her like a queen being compared to a mere serf, but for some strange reason, the king wanted the serf. Tsubame cursed her choice of not going home the minute she found out that Yahiko had already been taken, at least then she wouldn't have had to watch him with another girl and she could be happy at home with some other guy willing to do her bid. 

'You should've thought this through a little more,' she thought to herself with a shake of her head, 'well, at least tomorrow you can enjoy yourself at the party! There'll be plenty of guys to manipulate there. Too bad the one I want has already been manipulated by another girl...'

It was morning already, the day of the party, and Misao was sitting in Yahiko's room waiting for him to come out of the bathroom and announce if the cream had worked like it was supposed to. If so, that would indicate that they start planning out their break-up act that they would be doing in only a few minutes time.

"Oh my God..." Yahiko murmured as he came out of the bathroom, the huge diaper he had to wear for the last week in his hands as he stood in the doorway, his expression unreadable.

"What is it? Did the penis cream not work?" Misao asked with fake concern. 

Honestly, she had hoped that maybe the cream hadn't worked, that way she would be able to keep him as her boyfriend for a little while longer; even if it were just for a day more. It was selfish, but she wanted to keep him as hers. It was pretty obvious that Tsubame could have practically any guy she wanted while she, Misao, could barely even get the biggest loser in school. 

Misao had trouble sleeping the night before as she twisted around the logic that Tsubame should just move on and find some other guy that fit her more to her liking instead of Yahiko and just leave him to her. It wasn't fair that Tsubame was already beautiful, smart, and just pretty much perfect, but now she had to take away what Misao had rightfully deserved. She hoped with all her might that Yahiko was still too swollen up to go through with the plan, but unfortunately, a suspicious smile crept over Yahiko's face as he nodded his head.

"Actually, I'm fine! There's no more swelling whatsoever! Yeah, I'm finally gonna get laid!" Yahiko exclaimed, his excitement to get rid of her making Misao gulp back her tears and she stared at her hands in her lap to hide them from his sight, "Alright! Come on, sing it with me! Celebrate good times! Come on!" Yahiko did a drum roll on the bedpost.

Misao straightened up and gave him her warmest smile, the best one she could come up with. She wasn't about to let this ruin her happiness for him, or at least the fact that she should feel happy for him. After all, she knew that this was how it was going to end no matter what; Yahiko would spend time with her to learn more about sex, then he would go to Tsubame to use the lessons learned. That was the inevitable. But, Misao was going to miss him, more than she had ever missed anyone and he wasn't even going away...

"Well, it looks like this is it then! We're actually going to break up," Misao said, standing up to give him a congratulating hug, "It was fun being your girlfriend, even if it was for a little while. I hope you and Tsubame are happy together."

"Thanks, Misao!" Yahiko excitedly stated, "This was really great, but, um... since this is our last time that we're really going to be able to see each other in a while, I guess I should ask you something that's been on my mind for a while now... Why did you ditch me after prom?"

"Ditch you? I didn't uh... ditch you. I just... I didn't want to stick around for a really weird morning good-bye, that's all," Misao replied honestly, "I mean, you didn't really expect me to stay and have you pretend you were in love me with or anything, did you?"

"Why would I do that?" Yahiko asked quizzically.

"Well, guys do that. It's not really all that great of a feeling, so I just thought it'd be better for the both of us if I just left," Misao shrugged and then quickly changed the subject to a happier tone, "Hey! I've got an idea! How about you and Tsubame drop by my band camp concert after the party for like a date! It'd be fun!"

"We'll see, Misao. I mean, I don't know if we'll even be leaving the party, if you catch my drift..." Yahiko smiled, his eyebrows suggestively wiggling at the kinky hint, "But yeah, maybe if we have time, then we'll stop by." Misao nodded, the only thing she could do to hide her disappointment.

"Well, here we go..."

Both Misao and Yahiko took a deep breath before opening the door to act out their well rehearsed scene of breaking up. Just as they suspected, Tsubame was sitting all by herself in the living room, the perfect position for her to hear exactly what they were going to "argue" about.

"YOU BIG STUPID DUMMY!" Misao shouted out the door, making Tsubame drop the book she was reading to the ground in surprise and Misao grabbed Yahiko by his shirt, pulling him out the door with her, a mischievous glint in her blue eyes, "Isn't theater fun?"

Tsubame looked up from her book on the floor to see Yahiko and Misao condescending down the stairs, Misao obviously upset by the way she kept flailing her arms about in the air as Yahiko followed behind her, apologizing for some unknown reason. Tsubame watched with much interest.

"No! I don't care if you are the sexiest man I've ever met! No! I'm leaving right now!" Misao yelled, grabbing hold of her purse as she bounded down the stairs with Yahiko at her heels.

"Aw, don't say that! I thought we had something special!" Yahiko protested, his arms outstretching to Misao as he carried out his best acting face.

"We did! But you ruined it all 'cause you smell really really bad!" Misao shot back at him and Yahiko made a shocked look, indicating that what she said was not at all giving him points up with Tsubame and he viciously made "X" signs from behind Tsubame's back. Misao quickly corrected herself. "I mean! No! I smell! 'Cause we've been having so much wild animal sex and I'm tired! And I haven't taken a shower! And I want a shower! So don't you go being Mr. Super Sexy Man anymore because uh... I'm not ready for someone as sexy as you are! You big sexy... guy!"

Yahiko grinned in satisfaction from behind Tsubame, her attention solely on the yelling girl in the doorway so it was perfectly safe for Yahiko to nod in approval.

"And I don't care if you did give me eleven orgasms in a row with just a kiss! I can't take so much passion! You... you need to be locked up in a cage! You... you... you seductive wild man! I'm gonna go home and shower and then I'm gonna find a man that's not as good in bed as you are and then I'll be happy!" Misao added, causing Tsubame to tilt her head to the side in confusion to the girl's words. She was puzzled, but her opinion of Yahiko's sexual stamina was definitely making a huge U-turn. "You need to learn how to be less uh... amazing in bed! 'Cause I don't like having so much pleasure that I think I might explode! Yeah! And... and... and that includes fucking me in the ass!"

Misao then stormed out of the house, slamming the door so hard that the entire house shook. Yahiko couldn't have been more satisfied with her speech as he mouthed a, "That was SO great!" and he gave her a thumbs up. But his expression quickly changed to a depressed one when Tsubame turned around to look at him and Yahiko put a finger to his eye to wipe away a "tear."

"We... we had something special..." Yahiko whispered and just like a live worm on a hook, Tsubame took the bait. She hugged him close to her, her tight embrace sending shock waves through his body and he tried to finish up the act by giving out a sad sigh. But, Yahiko hadn't needed to force the sigh, it came by itself as the reality that Misao was now gone finally dawned on him and he allowed Tsubame to stroke his hair in an effort to comfort him. 

Somehow, her holding him made him feel a little better, but it still didn't wash away the fact that Misao was no longer his girlfriend. Why it seemed to affect him so much, Yahiko had no idea why and he tried to concentrate more on the beautiful girl that was pressing herself against him at the moment.

Outside, Misao sat in the driver's seat of her car, her seatbelt hanging out of the closed door, and she sniffled, trying to contain the oncoming tears. Wiping at her eyes, she fixed the straps and turning the car on with the key in the ignition, she pulled out of the driveway and out of Yahiko's life.  
  


A/N: Wanna know what happens?! Well I would too! Leave a review and I might let you know! ^^ BTW, sorry but there's no A/M in this story and also sorry for leading anyone on into thinking otherwise! Next up is my kinda drama chapter! OoOOoOoOoOOo! You won't wanna miss it!

P.S. Yahiko?! A sexy wild man?! Hahaha! 


	13. It's My Party And I'll Cry If I Want To

Chapter 12:

"It's My Party And I'll Cry If I Want To"

  
  


Silent, Kenshin sat on his little Tantra mat in the middle of his room, his hands clasps together as if in prayer in front of him and he wove back and forth in circles, humming some incoherent sound. The party was downstairs, raging with noise and clamor, but he wanted to stay up in his room for a little while longer and have some peace to himself and Tantra was a good way to do that.

Meanwhile, Kaoru was standing with Megumi in the middle of the party, drinking from her cup of beer as all the guests, either high schoolers from Jinchuu or people from the colleges, tried to move around them. Some were too drunk to even realize that they were standing at the side of the room and they were occasionally bumped into here and there.

"Ouch! Watch where you're going!" Megumi grumbled, frowning at yet another person that bumped into her before turning back to her friend, "I didn't think there was gonna be so many people here tonight." Megumi paused as Kaoru took another large gulp of her drink and the fox lady gave her a high eyebrow raise. "Uh, I think you've had enough to drink already, Kaoru. You sure you can still see? How many fingers am I holding up?" Megumi held up two fingers.

"Two. Megumi, don't be ridiculous! I'm fine!" Kaoru protested and as if on cue, she gave out a loud belch that was most likely heard all the way down to America, sending them both into a laughing riot.

"What's so funny?" Mina asked as she idly strolled over to them, beer cup in hand and a little swagger in her step. People had just started to arrive for the party about an hour ago and in only a few minutes time, it had been filled with an enormous population of teenagers from Lake Biwa and that traveled all the way from their home. Mina was the first person to get a drink and would most likely be the last to pass out. Surprisingly, she wasn't slurring her words yet, but she was obviously very close to it and Megumi and Kaoru took a step back from the strong smell of beer in her breath. "What? Does my breath smell bad?"

"Eheheh... um... How's the bump on your head?" Kaoru asked, avoiding the question as much as possible; she didn't want to tell Mina that her breath stunk to high heaven, "Is your headache gone?"

"What, this little bump for nothing?" Mina asked, pointing at the huge bump on her head that she claimed was nothing at all, but had probably doubled in size, "I've seen aphids bigger than this! This is nothing! I'm still good enough to get drunk off my ass! Besides, my headache's gone so now I can get as smashed as I want! Ooh! There goes a congo line! You ladies have fun, alright?"

"Later, Mina!" Megumi called after her red-headed friend as she pushed away about two or three other people in her effort to join in on the rapidly lengthening dance line heading out the door, "Just don't come running to us saying we didn't warn you when you find out just who you spent the night with!" Megumi turned to Kaoru with a smile, knowing perfectly well that Mina wasn't going to wake up alone and she motioned for Kaoru to follow her. "Come on, let's go see if Kenshin's coming down for the party or not. No amount of that Tantra stuff is going to make him want to miss this party!"

"I dunno, Meg, he might be busy meditating or something... I don't think we should bother him," Kaoru responded, shaking her head, "if he wanted to come down he would and..." She was cut off as she felt a hard slap against her backside. "HEY!"

"What?" Megumi asked, taking a small sip of her drink as she looked at the raccoon girl in confusion, "What happened?"

"Somebody just grabbed my ass!" Kaoru exclaimed, torn between being embarrassed or in pain as she rubbed her sore bottom, "And not very gently either..." Megumi started to laugh at her "problem," shaking her head as she was about to explain that occasional ass-grabbing was all part of going to a party when she was instantly struck out of it when she heard a loud shout.

"YOINK!" 

"Hey!" Megumi spun around as a guy whizzed by her on a skateboard, snatching her drink right out of her hand, and he winked at her, begging for a little attention. And boy, was he in for it. "That's mine!"

  
  


About an hour or so later and after more than a few bashings of a certain skateboarder, Kaoru and Megumi found themselves at the top of the stairs, right in front of Kenshin's bedroom door, huffing from the chase around the house. Someone on a set of wheels versus two women in high heels was not a very equitable race. Lucky for them, Kaoru had good aim and after realizing that they didn't stand any chance of catching up with him, she had thrown a beach ball at the back of his head. The best part was that he had been standing in front of a group of girls as he fell over, a huge lump on the side of his head, and got a fast full of carpet. First mission, get back at stupid skateboarder: Complete. Second, get Kenshin to leave his weird exercises: In progress...

Carefully, Megumi raised her hand up and lightly rapped on his door, "Kenshin, hey! You wanna come out now? You're missing the party!" A small muffle was heard behind the door, indicating that he was inside, but the door remained shut. Megumi automatically took a step back as Kaoru approached the door, eyes closed, with her left eyebrow twitching upward in impatience.

"Kenshin! Open this door right now!" Kaoru shouted, half-annoyed and half-excited to drag him downstairs to the party. She doubted he was any good at dancing since he obviously had no poise when it came to pool, but if he did any of that crazy Tantra stuff on the dance floor, she supposed it wouldn't seem so bad. And of course, if anyone asked what the hell he was doing, which she was sure they would, she could always blame it on alcohol. (A/N: Aw, good ol' alcohol. Is there anything it can't help you do?) 

"Kenshin! We know you're in there, get off your lazy butt and open up this door! Quit your meditating already! If you don't open the door, we will!" Silence. Kaoru waited for only a few seconds before she really got fed up. She could hear was some light shuffling around in the room, an obvious sign that he was still in there and she sighed dejectedly. "Okay, we're coming in there!"

Kaoru opened the door, actually, more like kicked it open, expecting to see Kenshin on his meditation mat and his eyes closed, the usual thing he did while he was doing his Tantra exercises, and it would have been her chance to whack him over the head and bring him back to the real world. But no, that wasn't at all what he was doing up in his room. Kaoru and Megumi stood completely still in the doorway, their mouths almost hitting the ground below as they stared at Kenshin on the floor, his hair all array about the carpet with Mina on top of him, her mouth devouring his. 

Kaoru dropped the cup of beer in her hand in shock, not even noticing as it spilled out onto the carpet as she kept her gaze glued on the couple on the floor, her heart ceased to beat and her breath nonchalantly caught in her throat. Megumi was in a less than surprised state, in fact, she was starting to get angry. 

Kenshin's eyes remained open throughout the entire ordeal, most likely just as shocked as they were that this was actually happening; he seemed to be paralyzed, scared even. Mina remained oblivious to the two extra human beings that had just entered the room as she continued in her pursue on Kenshin's body. At the tiny gasp that escaped through Kaoru's mouth, Kenshin looked up, and his mouth fell agape as his lavender eyes slowly caught those of the sparkling sapphires of Kaoru's.

"K... Kaoru..." Kenshin was able to murmur, but he didn't get to say anything else because before he knew it, she had already fled from the room without even turning back. The tears in her eyes were unmistakable and it ripped out his heart when he realized just what she had walked in on and seen him doing. He immediately pushed Mina off of him and rose to follow after Kaoru's form, already halfway out of the house, when Megumi suddenly came out of her surprised trance and slapped him hard across the face.

"You selfish bastard!" Megumi spat, the fire burning in her usual bright cinnamon brown eyes, smothering Kenshin with guilt, "How could you do this to her?!" She raised her hand again, but slowly brought it back down, the scowl never leaving her face. "No, you don't even deserve to get slapped. You are the most egocentric person I know! You don't even know how much...! I thought you cared about her! I thought she meant something to you! What is the matter with you?! How could you...?!" Megumi didn't finish, she couldn't. Instead, she just stalked away, leaving Kenshin alone with Mina yet again, his cheek burning red, but his heart more pained than the throbbing on his face.

Mina slowly got up from where he had pushed her aside to stand close to him and give him comfort. Her hand leisurely went up to touch his reddened cheek, but he jerked away before she could even brush a finger against him. He drew away from her as if she were some kind of plague endangering his life, but he did not look at her with anger; he didn't look at her at all. 

This was the woman that had thrown herself at him, begging for his forgiveness for treating him so horribly since the night at prom, and here she was still, practically asking him for forgiveness again. This time, he had no pity for her. He had told her earlier not to worry about it because it was all in the past and he held no grudge against her, and that was when she had flung herself on him, saying so many things that Kenshin couldn't quite catch it all. She had said she loved him, he was the most wonderful person in the world, and that she had always loved him and tried to cover it up for Kaoru's sake. Then she had caught him off guard by kissing him, and he had been so surprised that he hadn't had time to react before the door was opened and Megumi and Kaoru stepped inside. 

'Kaoru...'

He had wanted to call out to Kaoru when he heard her beckoning him at the door, but Mina had smothered him with kisses and covered his mouth, preventing him from speaking. After that, it had all fallen apart as he had tried to pull away from Mina and explain to Kaoru what had happened, but she had already run from the room before he had time to say anything other than her name. 

Megumi had been right to slap him, and he didn't hold anything against her for saying what she did, after all, it was half his fault that the entire thing had happened in the first place. He shouldn't have let himself react so slowly, he should have pushed Mina away at the first sign he had seen of what she intended to do, and he should have spoken up when Kaoru had stood there with tears in her eyes.

"Kenshin..." Mina began, but he held up his hand to stop her and her mouth closed so fast that her teeth clicked as they made contact.

"Mina, please. I have to find Kaoru and explain this to her, that I do," Kenshin said calmly, "This was all just a big misunderstanding and I have to let her know that. Please don't tell me anything else because I don't have anything on my mind right now other than fixing this problem with Kaoru." 

Mina opened her mouth to say something to stop him, but she knew it wouldn't do any good and she silently slunk back to allow him to leave the room. On the outside, she was quiet and obedient, but on the inside she was bawling her eyes out. Kenshin going to Kaoru to explain that it was all a 'big misunderstanding' meant that all that what she said meant nothing to him, therefore, his heart solely belonged to Kaoru. It always had.

Mina kept her head bowed as she couldn't watch him leave, knowing that she would most likely throw her arms around him again and beg him to stay, only to have him pull away and shake his head. No, she had more pride than that and she kept her face hidden from view as a tiny tear escaped her and she angrily clenched her fists, fighting against her own will to not cry in front of him. Mina had never lost a fight and she wasn't about to lose one now, but somehow, her tears seemed to be a whole lot stronger than her at that moment and one was followed by many. 

She let out a shudder. She felt completely disgusted by herself to sink so low as to cry over a man, but she was shocked when Kenshin moved over to her, tilting her chin up so her own violet eyes looked into his and he kissed her on her forehead.

"Mina, thank you for telling me what you did," Kenshin whispered, his voice so soft and smooth as his words slipped off his tongue and into her ears, "I am very flattered that you feel that way about me, but I'm sorry to say that there is nothing besides friendship that will ever become of us. But I want you to know that I will always be your friend, that I will. You stay here and dry those tears and I will go to talk to Kaoru."

Mina watched him exit the room, his red hair swishing left to right behind him with every step he took and she seemed unable to move. She remained paralyzed as she watched his disappearing figure lose it's shape in the crowds outside and very slowly, her ability to control her body came back to her and she ran to the top of the stairs, her hands gripping the railing as she overlooked the crowd for the red haired rurouni. But he was already long gone and she had no way of finding him. 

The tears had dried on her cheeks, now staining the sides of her face, and she viciously wiped them away. She didn't want proof that she had been crying to be worn on her face and she quickly regained her straight posture, pulling her shoulders back and holding her head high. Her life with Kenshin had turned out just as she had first suspected; they were friends and that was all that they would ever be. The difference now was that she accepted it and she could only hope that Kaoru and Megumi had the heart to forgive her for her selfishness.

  
  


Kaoru didn't know where she was running to and frankly, she didn't care, just as long as she got as far away from the party as possible. She was well aware of Megumi running after her, only a few feet behind, but she neither turned around to acknowledge her or stopped. 

'Kenshin...' Kaoru thought to herself as her tears slid off her face and got caught in the heavy breeze of the beach, creating tiny spots on the sand from where they fell, 'Kenshin... Why, Kenshin, why?' She only stopped running when she sure she was far enough down the beach that no one would be able to interrupt her unless they searched for hours on end. 

  
  


The footsteps of Megumi behind Kaoru were now gone and had been for the past ten minutes as Megumi had gotten tired of chasing after her; it was no use anyway since it seemed she had wanted to be alone.

Megumi sighed as she looked down the beach again, Kaoru's form suddenly only a mere speck in the distance and she held her hand over her eyes as a shade to see if she could look any farther down the beach. But it was useless. Her hand fell to her side in defeat, her sides cramping up from the long run from the beach house to where she now stood and she kicked at some sand in front of her in anger. 

'Now I have to walk all the way back to the beach house!' Megumi thought to herself angrily as she started her long walk back to the party, 'I've got to be at least half a mile away already! How did I get so far down the beach?' Megumi turned around again to look out for Kaoru, but she saw no sign of her. 'I hope Kaoru's alright... She's probably crying over that jerk. How could Kenshin do that to her?! And all this time, I thought he cared about her! And Mina! What the hell was going through her head?! Oh, forget it... Maybe I should just concentrate on my own problems... Like getting back to the beach house! Rooster-Head's gonna throw a tantrum when I get back! He's probably gonna be sending out a search party if I don't get back soon. Either that, or he's gonna start looking for me himself, then boy am I gonna be in trouble! He's gonna start interrogating me again and asking what took me so long... I have no idea where he gets all these "bad vibes" from Aoshi, but I bet it has something to do with Saito! That asshole always gives him wrong ideas and bad advice! Hmph! There seems to be nothing wrong with Aoshi how I look at it. I'm sure Sano's just jealous of me spending so much time with him...'

"I thought I saw you come out here," Aoshi's voice suddenly came from behind her, startling Megumi out of her thoughts and she jumped in surprise, catching herself before she let out a very inappropriate curse she heard Sano say quite often. Aoshi smiled. "Did I startle you?"

"Holy sh... iz! You shouldn't sneak up on people like that, Aoshi! Are you trying to give me a heart attack or something?" Megumi asked, holding her hand over her heart as she tried to bring it's pace down to normal level, "What are you doing all the way out here anyway? Why aren't you at the party?"

"I saw you run out here and I was wondering where you were going," Aoshi replied with a shrug and he began walking in the opposite direction of the house, "Besides, I wanted to go for a walk anyway. Wanna come?"

"Uh... I think I should be heading back. Rooster-Head.... I mean, Sano will get worried," Megumi excused herself and she started off towards the beach house again, but Aoshi gently took hold of her arm.

"It won't take long, I promise," Aoshi said sincerely, his ice blue eyes cutting into her gaze and he let go of her arm to continue walking down the beach. After a few seconds, he turned back to her. "Are you coming or not?"

"Well... alright. Just for a few minutes though, then I have to head back," Megumi agreed and she jogged over to catch up with him and meet up with his steady strides. 

They walked side by side down the beach in the opposite direction of the beach house, the distance between where they were and the party getting farther and farther apart with every step they took. Little did she know that that was exactly what Aoshi wanted; to separate them from everyone else as much as possible, and especially widen the distance between Megumi and her boyfriend.

  
  


Yahiko sat awkwardly in his room next to Tsubame, the space between them extremely small as Tsubame edged closer to him, a shy but provocative smile on her face. Now Misao had never trained him for anything like this so he was pretty much stuck with no intelligence of her flirting whatsoever and he just sat there like a deer in car headlights. 

With every inch that Tsubame closed between them, Yahiko became even more immensely aware of his attraction to her, doubling by the second until she was only an inch away from his face. He suddenly wondered if he should've changed his shirt.

Yahiko's eyes remained as wide as ever as she slowly inched her face towards his, leaning in for a kiss. She was so close to him, her scent was almost overwhelming, and he unconsciously moved away from her, only to find that he had been sitting on the edge of the bed and he fell onto the floor with a loud thump.

"Ow!" Yahiko exclaimed, rubbing his sore backside, thinking to himself that he most likely broke off a piece of his tail bone as his body continued to vibrate from the hard collision.

"Ohmigosh! Yahiko! Are you okay?" Tsubame asked, concern written all over her perfect features as she leaned over the side of the bed to peer down at him, "Did you hurt yourself?"

"Yes... no..." Yahiko answered, not sure if he should admit he, a "strong manly man," had hurt himself falling ten inches off the ground or denying it and saying that he was completely fine.

"Well, which is it?" Tsubame asked, her voice very worried, but it quickly changed to soft and seductive, "Do you want me to kiss your injury?"

"I....uh... well... um.. uh... ksjdfhksjdhjne....kjghjdngfj," Yahiko mumbled, his eyes again going back to their original state of practically popping out of their sockets and he searched for something to say. 

Tsubame smiled, "Yes? What're you trying to say, Yahiko?" 

"POSTCARDS!" he exclaimed suddenly, "I have postcards!"

"Huh?!" Tsubame asked dumbly, confused as to what the hell postcards had to do with her kissing away his 'bruises and pain' and she watched as Yahiko shot up from where he sat on the ground and lunged for something under his pillow. Tsubame used this time to wonder again about why exactly she loved dorks.

"Here! Postcards!" Yahiko announced as he thrust all the tiny cards and mini letters she had sent him while she was in China into her arms, "Lots of postcards!" Her surprise fading a bit, Tsubame sat them all down in her lap, fingering through them and examining each one as if she were trying to re-memorize them. "You sent a lot and I kept them." Yahiko scratched the back of his head nervously, feeling like a complete idiot for changing the subject from her kissing him to some stupid postcard collection he had started. If Tsubame hadn't been there, he would've smacked himself for his stupidity.

'Damn it! She almost kissed you!' Yahiko scolded himself, internally kicking at his brain, 'God, you're an idiot! You just HAD to whip out the postcards, didn't you?! As if not enough people think you're a dork already, you gotta let her know too!' 

To Yahiko's surprise and utter joy, Tsubame smiled.

"You saved them all? That's so sweet!" Tsubame exclaimed, bright flashes of stars shining in her chocolate brown orbs as she began reading the back of one of the postcards she had sent him out loud, "Dear Yahiko, I hope all is well over there because all is well here. Please tell your grandpa that I did get to see Cats on Broadway while I was here. I miss you a lot and I count the days when I will get to see you again. Love, Tsubame." She finished reading and faced him, the bundle of postcards in her lap slipping from their place in the shape of her legs and they all fell to the ground. "That's really cute that you kept them all. I thought you probably threw them away."

"So you don't think I'm a dork or anything?" Yahiko asked, surprised that she was actually pretty fascinated with the fact that he owned a postcard collection, or any collection for that matter, and she moved closer to him, placing her hand on his inner thigh and sending shivers up his spine.

"Well... dork or not, Yahiko, that's what I like about you," Tsubame admitted and again, she slowly raised her eyes up to look at him, gazing at his face through her dark eyelashes. Yahiko gulped back the lump in his throat. Gradually, Tsubame's hand left it's place on his thigh and moved up to the side of his face, gently cradling his cheek as she leaned in to kiss him again. This time, Yahiko was determined not to fall off the bed and humiliate himself yet again. 

Nervous, Yahiko licked his lips before he closed his eyes, leaning in as well. Tsubame's mouth was only about a centimeter of two away from his when Sanosuke suddenly burst into the room with wild eyes, breaking Yahiko and Tsubame away from each other to stare at him.

"Yahiko! Have you seen the fox?! I can't find her anywhere!" Sanosuke panicked, frantically picking up a few stray clothes on the floor as if to find her hiding out underneath them. Finding nothing under the pile of dirty shirts, he turned back to Yahiko, not even realizing that he had just interrupted him and Tsubame as he opened up the closet to search through there as well; he didn't even notice the couple's sweatdrop from his crazed rampage. "I got up this morning and she was gone. I asked around a little, but no one knew where she was. You know where she is?"

"Nah uh," Yahiko said, shaking his head from left to right, Tsubame's arm still wrapped around his shoulders, "I thought she was with you."

"Are you guys talking about Megumi? I thought I saw her outside on the beach walking with some guy," Tsubame spoke up and she turned to Sanosuke, confused when both he and Yahiko exchanged worried glances, "Why? What's with the weird faces? Is Meg alright?"

"Did this guy she was with have black hair? Kinda weird looking? Thin guy?" Sanosuke asked, making small hand gestures as to how tall Aoshi was compared to him, "About yay high?"

"Yeah, that sounds like him alright," Tsubame said with a nod, "I think they went down the beach somewhere that way." Tsubame pointed out the window to a far end of the beach, now clear of any human life, let alone the rooster-head's girlfriend, and Sanosuke felt his stomach tie into tight knots. 

"Alright, thanks," Sanosuke murmured as he turned to the door, but then suddenly turned back as he realized that Yahiko and Tsubame had been about to... probably.. you know... when he had barged in. Laughing nervously, he gave them both a look of apology. "Eheheh... sorry for interrupting your uh... yeah. I didn't see anything! Uh... have fun, kids! Be safe!" 

And with that, Sanosuke ran out the door, bounding down the stairs so fast that the echo of his footsteps needed to be drowned out by the music speakers. He jumped the steps, two at a time, with only one thought going through his head: 'Get Aoshi Shinimori away from my Megumi!'

  
  


A/N: BUM BUM BUM! more dramatic music So this happened to be my drama chapter, where the story is now veering off more to my original work instead going along with the movie. Hopefully it's still good though! Lemme know what you think and I'll try and update as soon as I can! Thanks!


	14. I Just Can't Help Myself

Chapter 13:

"I Just Can't Help Myself"

  
  


Kaoru didn't know when she stopped crying, but it was a long while until she had found a spot on the far off end of the beach to rest at before she had actually been able to calm herself down. She flipped her ponytail over her shoulder once again as the wind picked up and blew it in her face, like a persistent child asking for attention. Her hands lay limp in her lap, every once in a while twitching every so slightly. If she ever felt even the tiniest bit like crying again, her fists would ball up and she'd fight against it. 

Her melancholy state had soon been replaced with anger as the day soon turned to evening, the first stars gleaming above her as she sat still on the log that had washed ashore, and her silence almost made it seem as though she weren't even alive.

Kenshin stood a good two feet away from her, watching as her fists clenched tightly in anger in her lap. With her back to him, he was still not able to see her face, nor the expression she had, and he cautiously made his way over to her. He wanted to reach out and touch her, but he knew that such a forward action would only give him yet another slap and Kenshin's right cheek was still red from the last one he received from Megumi.

"Kaoru...?" Kenshin started, his footsteps so close behind her, causing her tense up and her spine grow rigid. 

She spun around to face him. Only for a moment did she forget that he was the one that had upset her so much, and she almost smiled at him. She wanted to throw her arms around him and tell him about her tearful issues, but the biggest problem was that HE was her problem. Immediately, the sparkle in her eyes vanished, quickly replaced with dark pools of nothing other than heated anger.

Kenshin had to take a step back from the look she had given him, but his intuition to stay and explain everything to her made him sit down on the log beside her. He made sure that he left a huge gap in between them of arm's length, that way, she would have to make an effort to move if she wanted to hit him and it would give him a little more time to duck. 

"Kaoru, I need to explain about what you saw in there," Kenshin began again, "Mina was just..."

"You don't have to tell me about her. You don't even have to explain yourself to me at all. Why should I care what you do anyway?" Kaoru harshly spoke, cutting at him with her words like a dozen sharp razors that shaved way too close, "It doesn't matter to me what you do with her or anyone for that matter, it's none of my business. I had no right to run out of there like I did, after all, I don't own you. Do what you want with Mina, I could care less."

"You're lying, Kaoru, that you are," Kenshin said quietly as the sky seemed to almost envelope him up in the light pink and orange colors of the horizon across the water, "If you didn't care what I did with her, you wouldn't have stormed out like you did and you wouldn't be... hurting so much. Kaoru, it is as much your business as it is mine. Whatever you think you saw, that wasn't it at all, that it wasn't."

"And what do you know what I think it was?!?!" Kaoru demanded, her voice rising in volume, reaching higher and higher until it practically tore at the clouds and she turned her angry glare towards him, "You don't even know what I saw! Or what I was thinking! Mina was with you in your room! Kissing! Yeah, I think I know what was really going on in there, Kenshin! If you and Mina were together, you could've at least told me! You could've at least let me know so I wasn't going around like a total fool and saying that I...!" 

Kaoru trailed off, not wanting to tell him the rest of what she was about to say, but the damage was already done and Kenshin already knew what she didn't finish. She turned her face away, her face burning hot with embarrassment and the tears began coming on again. This time she brushed them away, too tired to hold it all in anymore, and she wiped the falling tears off her face as if they would explode at any given second. 

No, she didn't want to give him the liberty of hearing her say she loved him and she didn't want to let him see how much this event had affected her. She'd like to keep that little thing to herself, even if dignity was a very lonely friend. Kaoru refused to let him know what was truly in her heart.

"Saying that you what?" Kenshin pushed on, "Kaoru, please tell me." 

There was no way he was about to let that one slide! No way! No how! She was about to say that she loved him, he felt it, but she had stopped herself before she could actually say the whole thing. Kenshin felt the air between them growing tenser with every second that passed by that Kaoru didn't speak and he knew that she knew he was not leaving her alone until she admitted how she really felt. 

"Kaoru, please finish your sentence," Kenshin practically pleaded, his violet eyes begging her to continue, for her to say what he had been longing to hear. And if she hadn't been so self-righteous about not telling the selfish bastard, she would have yelled it from the roof of the light house that she loved him since the day they met. 

"Kaoru, if you don't talk to me, then I will talk to you, that I will," Kenshin replied with a sigh of defeat and he settled himself closer to her on the log, his legs stretched out in front of him and his arms at his sides, "I don't know if you know this, that I don't, but I'm going to tell you anyway... That party at your brother's about a month ago, I wasn't invited, but I went anyway so that I could see you. I went to your room to say hello, but you weren't there. The next thing I knew, Saito was coming after me, threatening to break every bone in my body for ever setting foot in your house. I saw you come to my defense, but I was tossed outside. I tried to talk to you through your window, but I suppose you didn't hear me..." Kenshin looked up from his gaze on the ground to inspect Kaoru's reaction, but she remained silent and her back was still to him. Despite that, Kenshin was determined and he continued. 

"You see, Kaoru, I went willingly to that party because I knew you would be there and despite the fact that Saito would most likely wring my neck, my need to see you again was far greater than my fear of what could happen to me if something happened, that it was. I had missed seeing you then, but I miss you even more now, even if you're sitting right next to me. It's just not the same."

Kaoru paused as she let out her breath, not even realizing that she had been holding it in until he had finished speaking, and she turned to face him. Indeed, the anger was gone from her eyes and the blue color in them seemed to turn more into the ocean glint more than the blackened gloss that had been there only moments before. Her face softened when she looked at him, but still she didn't say a word. She didn't move any closer, neither did she move farther. Kenshin took this as a good sign and he resumed his speech.

"Mina is my friend and although you may think something else of what happened earlier today, what I'm telling you is the truth, that it is," Kenshin replied softly, his violet eyes shining under the downcast of the approaching stars, "I was in my room while the party was going on downstairs when Mina came in and said she needed to talk to me. Of course, I let her sit down and tell me whatever was on her mind, but somewhere in the middle of all that she was saying, I got lost and her words were rushed like she didn't really want me to hear them. Then, she threw her arms around me and told me she loved me and such. To tell you the truth, I was too shocked to really do anything, that I was, but I was even more shocked when she started to kiss me. I heard you outside the door, but I couldn't say anything because she was covering my mouth. And then I saw the look in your eyes when you saw us together, and it tore me apart. Kaoru, I didn't mean to hurt you and I'm sure Mina didn't either; you just walked in on the wrong moment, that you did." Kenshin stopped in his explanation and turned to look at her. Was it just him, or were her shoulders tensing up less and less? He cleared his throat before he began again. "You don't have to believe me, that you don't, but I most certainly hope that you will. I would never lie to you, Kaoru, I never could and I never will. At least believe that much."

Kaoru remained silent. Only the low whistle of the breeze and the washing up of the shores brought noise to where they sat, the sun barely peeking up over the ocean tide and it left shimmering elements of the last of it's light over the water's reflection. She sat still, not daring to move as if it would break away her deep concentration as she played what Kenshin had said over and over in her mind until she could have repeated them back to him, word for word. 

She found no error in it at all, only sheer honesty, as the honest man Kenshin was. Slowly, the corner of her mouth curved up and she diverted her eyes to him, the tears there startling him more than Mina ever could have, no matter what she did. Immediately, he rose and knelt by her side, his eyes questioning her for why she was crying yet again.

"Kenshin..." Kaoru murmured and she threw her arms around him, pulling him close to her, the smell of dishwashing liquid and fabric cleaner filling her senses as his aroma enveloped her into what he had done during the day. The tears still came, landing in great pools on his shirt sleeve, but Kenshin didn't seem to mind. 

"I'm sorry..." she whispered, nuzzling her hair to his neck as she cried into his shoulder, "I shouldn't have accused you of doing anything I knew was completely unlike you. I believe you, Kenshin, I really do. I just doubted it all when I saw you with her. I had no idea that you cared so much about me, not by a long shot. But I know now and I can tell you that I..." Kaoru paused a bit, her hesitation hovering over her for only a few brief moments before she recovered herself. "I can finally tell you that... I love you..."

"I love you too, Kaoru," Kenshin said, completely forgetting to add his usual, 'that I do' after his sentence and Kaoru looked up at him in surprise at the lack of a few syllables in his sentence, "Oro? Oh, right! That I do." 

Kaoru smiled at his quick fix and hugged him closer, the wind whipping her hair out of her ponytail and the long black strands enclosed around them like a soft veil. Neither person pushed away any of the stray hairs that blew across their faces as they leaned in closer to each other, the swift kiss on their lips meaning more to them than wasting any amount of energy to wipe away loose strands of entwined red and black hair. After all, they would need to save up as much energy as possible for later...

  
  


Megumi turned around for what seemed to Aoshi, to be the millionth time in the same minute and he let out an exasperated sigh. They had already passed the noisier part of the beach where all the seagulls were, but they still continued on. 

She obviously wanted to go back to the beach house, but Megumi didn't want to appear rude to Aoshi if she didn't at least walk with him for a little bit. She wasn't at all aware that they kept getting farther and farther away from the party and she didn't become aware of that fact until she realized she could no longer hear the music in the background. 

Megumi turned around questioningly, her eyes scanning back to where the beach house had been once before but was now only an inch wide from where she stood. Megumi abruptly stopped walking, looking back at the house with worry and Aoshi stopped a few seconds later as he realized that she had stopped following him. He turned back and gently touched her arm.

"What's the matter?" he asked, trying very hard to keep the annoyance from his voice. All she had done for the past twenty minutes was turn around and look back at the house with longing eyes. Aoshi was a bit past being irritated. 

"I've been out here a lot longer than I should have been. I should start going back now," Megumi answered him and she gave Aoshi a polite smile, "Thanks for the walk, it was nice." Silently, she started to leave, but Aoshi was able to grab her shoulder and pull her towards him again. 

She gasped in surprise when her back hit the hard surface of a nearby boulder and Aoshi leaned forward in front of her, one arm pressing against the rock behind her on her right side, blocking her from escape. 

On instinct, Megumi moved to the empty left side, only to come across Aoshi's left arm, now blocking that exit as well, his blue eyes piercing through her as if he had every intention on claiming her his prisoner with his eyes as shackles. Megumi stiffened and gave him a confused expression, looking him in the eye to avoid the claws of his forward thinking. 

"Aoshi, what are you doing?" Megumi asked, pushing gently at his body to move out of her way, "Come on, this isn't funny, I have to go back to the party now. Everyone's probably wondering where I am. I wouldn't be surprised if they were looking for me right about now."

"Don't worry too much, Megumi. You're with me so there's obviously no reason to be concerned. Besides, even if they did go out looking for you, it's not like they'd find you that fast. Not if they leave right now anyway since we're about a mile and a half away from the beach house and it'll get dark soon. They won't be able to find you at night, not even that boyfriend of your's," Aoshi said, never moving even an inch away from where he had deliberately blocked Megumi from evading him. 

She was surrounded at every angle thought possible and there was no way Aoshi was going to let her get away. He had her all to himself now and he wasn't about to let her go back to the party until he had his fill of his daily dose of Megumi Takani.

Something about the way he spoke to her, the way he had practically spat out the words, "that boyfriend of your's" as if it hurt him to say it, it all set off an alarm in Megumi's head that rang out about her ears like a police siren. The things Sanosuke had told her earlier about bad vibes suddenly became very apparent to her as she started to feel them too. The first thing that entered her head at that moment was to get as far away from Aoshi as possible, the second thing was that she was indeed about a mile and a half away from the beach house, and the last thing that entered her mind was that, with almost two miles distance from any other people, no one would be able to hear her scream...

Her eyes widened as the possibilities of what could very well happen if she wasn't careful ran through her mind like a tornado sweeping up the countryside. But mostly, her thoughts were to get herself away from Aoshi; the problem was that he was blocking her of any exit and if life taught her anything, she knew very well that the only way to go, was forward.

"Aoshi, let me go," Megumi commanded, her cinnamon gaze challenging his icy one, the look that usually set people straight and running, but Aoshi didn't even blink. Shocked at his ignoring her request, Megumi cleared her throat to make sure he heard her the next time. "I said, let me go."

"What will you give me if I do?" Aoshi asked her, his voice low and deep and she couldn't help but keep the prickling feeling that crawled up her spine at his suggestive question. The siren went off in her head again, warning her of the close distance she had with danger, but it was no use trying to resolve the problem with Aoshi still blocking her path. Suddenly, Megumi became very alive with the feeling of his breath against her cheek and she turned to look at him. 

"Just cooperate, Megumi," Aoshi soothed as he inched closer, his nose nuzzling her neck so smoothly that she barely felt it, "don't worry about a thing. I'm not going to hurt you, just give in. You know how I feel about you, don't you? You know I would give you the world if I could, right? I can give you everything you ever dreamed of, anything your boyfriend couldn't provide. I could give you anything you wanted, anything. All you have to do is admit you feel the same way about me..."

Megumi's eyes flashed with fear as Aoshi closed in on her, his breath on her face growing hotter with every movement he made as he got closer and closer to her. Her body was practically pinned against the boulder behind her and she turned her face away from him. She couldn't take the intense look he held in those eyes of his, a look she saw only on Sanosuke, the only person she ever allowed to look at her in such a way. 

His hand moved to touch her face, leaving the right side of her free of his guard and Megumi took this chance as Aoshi was so distracted with leaning in to capture her lips. She instinctively turned her face away, quickly lifting her left leg up and kicked him hard in between his legs.

"Fuck!" Aoshi shouted as he pulled away to cover his crotch from the hard blow he had just received, "Jesus!" 

With her body free of his practically smothering her against the rock, Megumi ran as fast as she could while he was too caught up in comforting his private areas. But she didn't get too far down the beach when she felt a strong arm pull her back and Megumi soon found herself face to face with a quite upset Aoshi Shinimori. This time, he roughly pushed her up against the boulder, no longer being patient with her, and his eyes grew as dark as coal, his grip on her shoulders tightening to the point that Megumi couldn't move.

"Let me go, Aoshi!" Megumi shouted, struggling against his grip, but his glare silenced her. It sent shivers down her back, adding to the throbbing headache the sirens in her brain kept ringing in her ears, and she felt the hairs on the back of her neck rise on end. Frantically, Megumi looked around for someone to help her, but that only made Aoshi even more enraged and he shook her vigorously to get her attention back to him. 

"Let me go or I'll scream!" Megumi threatened, not able to keep the wavering from her voice. She had been told numerous times that she was a brave woman, but right now, none of that mattered when she was compared to the strength of Aoshi Shinimori.

"Don't be stupid. Are you really gonna throw away your chance at being with me with some guilty conscience vibe?" Aoshi asked her, his voice booming out in anger, so different from the soft gentle one Megumi was used to and she felt herself trembling under his grasp, "Just admit it. You've wanted me since the day we met! Go on, admit it. The only reason you're pulling away is because you don't want that idiot boyfriend of your's finding out, isn't that right?!"

"No! You think that just because you have all this money that I'm supposed to fall head over heels in love with you? That I'm just supposed to drop everything and everyone I care about so I can live a life of luxury?! You thought dead wrong, Aoshi! I pulled away because I don't want you," Megumi drew back her neck and hawked spit in his face, the saliva taking it's time as it dripped down his cheek like the last few drops of a river dying down into light air. 

He turned to her, fire flashing before his eyes, melting away the cold ice that she used to think made his eyes remind her of the sea after a storm, but now only made her cower with fright. Gathering up all her courage, Megumi looked Aoshi in the eye.

"It doesn't matter if Sanosuke's here or not! He's still gonna kick your ASS!" Megumi snarled at him, never losing the strength in her voice, because right now, she knew what she was saying was in no way something to be taken lightly, "I don't care if he can't hear me now because he will hear about this later! And if you think you're gonna get anything from me besides another kick to the groin, you've got another thing coming!" 

"We'll just see about that, Megumi," Aoshi snapped and he turned her to face him again, running his tongue down the side of her neck. Megumi cringed under his touch and again tried to wrestle away. 

"Get off me!" she shouted, wrenching her body every which way to avoid his wandering and unwanted kisses, "Stop it!"

"SANOSUKE!!!" she cried again, hoping with all her might that wherever her boyfriend was at that moment, that he would hear her. But even Megumi knew that the likelihood of that happening was slim to none; he wouldn't be able to hear her if he was still at the party almost two miles away. This time, her shout succeeded in making Aoshi even more frustrated with her and his hold on her shoulder tightened.

"You still think that he's gonna save you, huh?" Aoshi asked, acting impervious to the fear he was causing her, "Kick my ass, will he?! I'll believe that when I see it!"

"Seeing is believing..." Megumi suddenly replied, holding her head high as she glared back at him, but her gaze slowly wandered to something in back of him.

Puzzled, Aoshi turned around to see the thing that had created such a looming shadow over both of them and distracted Megumi enough to stop her pleas, but only to find his face to come into direct contact with Sanosuke's fist.

POW! (A/N: Just imagine one of those old Batman television series screen popping up with a million stars surrounding the word 'POW!' and you'll get the picture. ^^) 

Aoshi immediately flew backwards, his back roughly made contact with the boulder that Megumi still stood pressed against, and his unconscious body slid down the tall rock until he sat on the ground, his head hanging low, obviously out cold. 

Cautiously, Sanosuke averted his eyes away from the despising rich boy on the ground and turned his attention to Megumi, who still stood unmoving against the boulder. 

"You okay, Fox?" Sanosuke asked her, his hand still balled up into a fist, huge beads of sweat rolling down his face from running down the entire beach trying to find her. She said nothing. "Megumi?"

The sound of his voice snapped her out of her trance and upon hearing her name, Megumi automatically ran into his strong arms, a sure sign that she was fine. Sano took special note that there were no blood stains or bruises on her body whatsoever. Instantly freed of his concern, Sanosuke breathed a sigh of relief that he had gotten there in time and he held her shaking body closer into his embrace, kissing her lightly on the forehead.

"Don't scare me like that, okay? I practically went nuts lookin' for you. You sure you're alright? 'Cause if that bastard hurt you, I'm gonna...!" Sanosuke began, but after Megumi's vigorous nodding against his shoulder, his concern returned and he shut up. Shaking still, he softly whispered soothing words into her ears until she was finally calm enough to stop her endless murmuring. Finally satisfied that no vital harm was done, Sanosuke quickly diverted his eyes back to Aoshi Shinimori, still unconscious on the ground. 

Megumi noticed him looking at the fallen man and she turned as well, watching him sleep for a moment before she kicked a heap of sand on him. Sanosuke laughed and did the same until Aoshi's arm was completely invisible to the naked eye. It was buried deep in the sand now, his face covered with the hard beige grains and they made him look like he had a very severe case of dry skin. Megumi couldn't help it; she kicked more sand. 

"What are we going to do with him?" Megumi asked, nodding her head towards Aoshi's form, never letting go of her hold around Sanosuke's neck, as if he might disappear and leave her with that pervert again if she didn't cling on to him. Sanosuke looked from Megumi's face to Aoshi's sleeping one sprayed with mists of sand and a mischievous smirk crossed over his lips.

"I've got an idea," Sanosuke said as he reluctantly pulled away from his girlfriend, her trembling now gone, and he spotted an object a few feet down by the shore, "Here, hand me that shovel over there." Megumi was about to ask what for, but after Sanosuke's shooing with his arms, she merely nodded and took off.

With Megumi running a little farther down shore, Sanosuke strutted over to the pompous jerk that had dared try and make a move on his fox and glared him down with his eyes. He was very much tempted to just pick him up and toss him in the ocean, but he was sure that Aoshi would sink straight to the bottom with all the pounds of cash in his pocket.

'And speaking of cash...' Sanosuke thought to himself, a clever idea making it's way over to the electric bulb over his head, and he smiled devilishly at the idea that had just occurred to him. Quickly scanning his eyes over the beach for any witnesses of the crime, Sanosuke smiled when he saw none and he discreetly grabbed something from Aoshi's shirt pocket. Looking down the beach for any signs of watchful eyes, he placed the leather object in his own pocket when he saw that he was alone. Megumi soon came back with the shovel and he gladly took it from her hands as he busied himself with his plan. Sanosuke barely noticed that a few coins fell out of his pants' pocket.

  
  


Aoshi awoke to the sound of numerous squawking surrounding him, his eyes still not focused enough for him to realize where he was and he shook his head to clear up his vision. His eyes slowly came to converge and they widened as he looked at his surroundings. 

Everywhere, there were seagulls, walking along the sand, flapping about, all so very close to him. Frowning, Aoshi tried to lift his arm to swat them away, only to find that it wouldn't budge. Looking down confusedly at where his arm would be, all Aoshi saw was sand. Even more confused, he gasped and strained as he tried to move his legs, but they didn't move at all either. 

'Wait a second! Why are all the birds eye level with me?!' Aoshi thought in panic as he watched the birds again, and in realizing that one was actually taller than him, Aoshi gasped, 'Oh my god! They buried me! Those poor pathetic sons a bitches buried me!' 

He became frantic as he struggled again from under all the heavy weight of the sand, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't even move a single finger.

"Damn it!" Aoshi shouted out loud, succeeding in scaring off the flocks of seagulls around him and they all took off on their wings into the air. Seeing that they would no longer be around to bother him, Aoshi breathed a sigh of relief, "Phew! They're gone!" 

But not even a second later, he felt something warm and gooey fall onto his head and Aoshi frowned in confusion at the goopy mush he felt slowly making it's way down his once clean strands of hair. Looking up at the sky, he gulped back his last amount of saliva he had in his parched mouth as he saw all the seagulls he had scared off hovering overhead, dropping down their little gifts for him for taking up their space. 

"Aw, hell! Get away, you little fuckers! I'll get you for this as soon as I get outta here!" he shouted at them as he tried to move his arm again to reach for the log a few inches away and bat them off, but to no avail. "God damn it! Quit fucking shitting on me!" Aoshi felt another dropping hit him on the forehead and he sighed in defeat. Within moments, Aoshi Shinimori's entire head was covered in seagull crap, a frown on his face and a hopeless look in his eyes, his body buried up to the neck in the beach sand. And all the while, he muttered low under his breath, "I HATE the beach..."

  
  


A/N: Come on, you just knew all the couples were gonna get together in the end! You weren't worrying, were you? Hehe. Newayz, there's still Yahiko to deal with...

Yahiko: HEY! I RESENT THAT!

Me: I mean, there's still Yahiko to WRITE about... eheh... yeah... Leave a review and lemme know what you think, alright? Sorry for not updating fast enough, but I'm working on it!


	15. Having What You Want, Wanting What You H...

Chapter 14:

"Having What You Want, Wanting What You Have"  
  


"So Tsubame... uh... do you... like... stuff?" 

Yahiko was at a complete loss for words. Misao had never really told him anything about conversation starters and he had never even considered that they would be talking at all. He only asked for assistance on what was the most important thing he wanted to know about at the time, and that was sex. He had assumed that they would kinda just hop to it and jump into bed; he wasn't really expecting to have to talk to her at all before or after. 

Silently, Yahiko cursed under his breath for not considering all the issues he could have stumbled upon in the first place, because now it was too late and he was acting like a total fool in front of the very girl he had been preparing so long for. Yahiko wanted to smack himself silly for saying something as stupid as asking her if she likes stuff, but he kept his hands restrained from doing so since it would most likely make him look even more idiotic.

"Um... I like most stuff..." Tsubame said with a shrug and Yahiko nodded in understanding, although he was screamingly angry at himself beneath the completely fake grin. 

'Of course she likes stuff, you idiot!' Yahiko scolded himself for the umpteenth time of that night, 'Man, I knew I was gonna screw up... Maybe I should just get someone to sew my mouth closed, that way I won't ever have to be blamed for saying something stupid in front of pretty girls like Tsubame ever again! Or any girls for that matter! Crap, Tsubame's looking at you! Smile!' 

Yup, communication skills were definitely not his best subject as Tsubame could tell, but she thought it was just short of adorable that he was nervous around her. She couldn't blame him either; she was really pretty. It was obvious of what she really came here to do and it was also obvious that Yahiko knew it too. He had to know. After all, she had hinted and hinted and hinted in all her letters of just what she expected as soon as she got back. 

But thinking about what they had both been looking forward to made her blush slightly, now getting nervous too. Here she was, having traveled half across Europe to see a guy she hadn't seen in a year, that she had a huge crush on, and they were both thinking about sex, but they weren't having it! All in all, their lack of sex charges (otherwise known as not being horny) was getting more frustrating than cute.

"So... What are your best memories of high school?" Yahiko asked finally, his question taking Tsubame's concentration off the fact that Yahiko kept itching at his scalp. He knew it was a weird question, extremely random if anything, but it was the only thing he could come up with on such short notice. Yahiko never considered himself too much of a quick thinker.

"Memories of high school? I have a few good ones, but when you travel as much as I do, you don't really get that many by staying in only one place," Tsubame replied, swinging her light green sandals with her arms as she briskly walked beside him along the beach. 

The party had been loud, crowded, and well... kinda smelly. It didn't exactly set the mood for what the two had planned so Yahiko had suggested that they take a walk. But without the noise of the party in the background, there was no excuse to stay quiet, but neither had anything to talk about. 

Sighing, Tsubame's face suddenly brightened as she spotted a rock nearby and she happily skipped over to it, grateful for an excuse to ease her aching feet. It was about five minutes later and Tsubame had already gotten comfortable in her seat by the time Yahiko realized where she wasn't walking anymore. Embarrassed for not catching on earlier, Yahiko jogged on over and settled down next to her on the huge boulder. 

"I have a few good memories with my friends from last year though. Like sleep-overs at Megumi's house, going to the mall with Kaoru, getting advice from Mina, and.... watching you on the internet..." Tsubame continued, her eyes shifting a bit when she mentioned the unforgettable internet incident that had happened last year and she smiled at Yahiko's crimson face color. Seeing that he wasn't up for reminiscing about blowing his load, Tsubame quickly changed the subject to something less... mortifying and personal. "Anyways! I have my good memories of high school, what are yours?"

"Mine? Well, let's see... There's uh... you," Yahiko mumbled out sheepishly and earning himself a sweet smile from Tsubame, "There's hanging out at the diner with Sano and Kenshin, stuff at Saito's parties, prom. You know, all that fun stuff."

"Hm... Well, what's something that you think you're gonna remember for the rest of your life?" Tsubame asked innocently. There was nothing sexual about her question, but the way she was running her hand over Yahiko's knee and thigh was definitely a little distracting; not that he was complaining or anything. Leaning a bit closer to him, Tsubame spoke again. "Is there anything that you think was just so great that it left a big impact on your life? And not just high school, I mean, for your whole life in general."

Yahiko smiled at her question, partly because the first thing, or event, that came to his mind was the time he had spent with Misao at the beach house watching the movie, 'From Hell.' He had been really surprised to see her at his doorstep that day and he was even more surprised when she said that she was concerned about the whole super glue charade. (He still had no idea how in the world she had found out about it since it was only a day later and HE obviously hadn't told her.) 

Yahiko smiled at the remembrance of how they both stood up in unison to yell at the stupid characters on screen and ended up shouting out the same things. Sure, they'd been silenced by Saito and everyone else within three yards distance, but they had a great time prancing around and singing, "Can't touch this!" He didn't even want to think about how bad his day could've been if Misao hadn't been there.

With everyone at the house knowing about his 'sticky situation' (pun intended), already that morning, they had all given him the beat down about how stupid they thought he was. Yeah, he knew that confusing super glue with lubricant wasn't exactly something you hear about everyday, but still, he felt dumb enough already without having to hear all their shit. So when Misao showed up at the door, his friends all quieted down and agreed to watch the movie without bugging him. Misao had gotten him through that day and in a way, he was forever grateful. Besides that, it was good to have someone besides himself get scolded for not being quiet during a movie and he always had fun dancing around by himself, but with another person, it was even better.

"Well, this one time, at the beach house, I had just gotten out of the hospital for uh... something and everyone was on my back about it. So Misao showed up and we were watching this movie, I dunno if you've heard of it, but it's called, 'From Hell,' and these people on screen had no idea what they were doing and it was so funny! So I got up and started yelling at them and yelling at them and then Misao joined in too. And then Kaoru got all mad at me for some reason and so me and Misao started singing, "Can't touch this." And then Saito got mad and we just kept singing and singing and no one had any idea what we were doing and it was so funny! Oh! And this one time, at band camp ...." Yahiko suddenly trailed off in his explanation as he finally realized just who he sounded like and he turned away from Tsubame to mutter something under his breath about tales at band camp.

"What? Go on, tell me!" Tsubame urged on, strangely interested in what Yahiko had to say and he gave her a look of puzzlement, "What happened at band camp?"

Yahiko closed his eyes for a moment, remembering that day when he had met up with Misao once again at East Falls and he smiled in memory of his impersonation of the mentally retarded child, "Petey," and his horrible playing of the trumpet in her concert. At the thought of a concert, Yahiko's eyes instantly shot open when he remembered that Misao was having another concert that very night and he quickly stole a glance at his K-Mart watch. 

It read seven- fifteen PM, less than half an hour from when Misao's band performance was going to take place, and he quickly glanced over at the driveway of the beach house to where his car was clearly parked. Yahiko sighed as he realized that if he hurried, he'd just make it in time.

"Tsubame... I have to go," Yahiko said finally and he started toward his car, his keys already out of his pocket as he took a step away, but Tsubame latched herself onto his arm like flour to water.

"What?! Why?!" she demanded, frantic and confused. If he left now, there was no telling if she would ever get this opportunity again. This was her last chance to be with him, and if things didn't happen right now, they never would. "Did I say something wrong?" Tsubame asked, her hand still gripping his upper arm, his tan skin so dark compared to her own complexion, "Did I miss something here or what? I thought... I thought we were having a good time..."

"Tsubame, we were having a good time, it's just that... I don't want you to take this the wrong way or anything, but... I can't do this. I mean, I know that you traveled all the way from China to see me, but there's somewhere I really have to be right now and there's someone I really need to see," Yahiko explained, giving her an apologetic look, "I'm really sorry, I just... can't."

"You want... you want the noisy band dork that pinches your nipples?" Tsubame concluded with a nod and Yahiko gave her a small smile.

"Yeah, actually. Yeah, I do," Yahiko replied, his smile growing wider until there was simply no more room left on his face. 

Misao was the one that had helped him try and gain what he wanted when, honestly, all he ever really wanted was her. All the funny feelings that made him queasy and ridiculously happy whenever she was around, now began to make sense. Misao was the one that he wanted to be with, it just took him a little while longer to realize it. 

"Thanks for understanding, Tsubame!" Quickly, Yahiko planted a kiss on her pale cheek and he ran off to his car without turning back, leaving Tsubame by herself on the rock with an encouraging smile growing on her pretty face, "Wish me luck!"

"Good luck, Yahiko! I'll be rooting for you! You go get your nipples pinched!" Tsubame called after him as his car drove out of the driveway. His car was already half way down the road when Tsubame finally whispered to herself, a tiny sigh escaping her lips, "Misao is one lucky noisy band dork..."

  
  


"And our next soloist will be Misao Makimachi on the flute," the man announced on the stage, his voice loud and clear ringing through Misao's pounding ears and she warily stood up on nervous legs. A girl beside her tugged a little on the white sleeve of her collared shirt and gave her a quick thumbs up for luck. Misao faked a smile.

Tired, she gave an exasperated sigh as the band camp counselor announced her name for her to stand up and perform her flute solo up on stage. She was usually so open and outgoing towards even complete strangers, but now, in front of almost three hundred onlookers that she had known practically all her life, Misao could feel her courage slowly melting away. 

Hopeful, she scanned her eyes over the audience of the auditorium, looking for Yahiko's spiky black set of hair and Tsubame's brown shag, but it wouldn't have mattered if Yahiko had been in the front row; the lights on her were so bright she wouldn't have been able to distinguish man from woman only a few feet in front of her. And even so, Misao could tell that they were nowhere in sight and she had a pretty good idea about what they were doing instead. The thought brought on another series of bricks piling up on her shoulders for a complete emotional break down. Misao prepared for her legs to give out.

Politely, she curtsied to the man as he took a step back to allow her freedom to the small microphone and the audience gave a light applause. Misao heaved a big breath before wobbling over to her place in the center of the light and carefully bringing the flute up to her lips, she placed her fingers gently over the instrument's holes. She softly blew into the end notch of the flute, bringing out a low tone, and dragging away her breath. Misao continued playing the song with a few more higher notes, a bit dull but still beautiful, when suddenly a huge trumpet's horn was heard in the back of the auditorium. Everyone in the audience turned to stare. 

Misao squinted under the light, trying desperately to see just who exactly she was doing a 'duet' with, but by the sounds of the horrible trumpeting, there was definitely a pretty good idea in her mind. She smiled when her eyes came to focus on Yahiko running down the steps of the auditorium and in seeing that she recognized him, he lifted the trumpet up again and let out another instantaneous blow.

"Petey?!" the announcer questioned as he watched the familiar looking boy run down the steps with the golden trumpet and the man turned to his friend standing next to him, "Isn't that Petey? What the hell is he doing here?!"

Misao smiled, her grin reaching from one ear to the other as she raised her flute up again to her mouth and blew, adding to their little song together and in response, she received a loud blare from Yahiko's borrowed trumpet. Ending the song with a few last notes, Misao dropped her hands down at her sides as she watched Yahiko descend down the millions of steps in the back of the stadium, waiting for him to come close enough so she could give him the initial hug. 

Yahiko paused again, placing the trumpet to his lips one more time and let out another loud sound that was obviously not at all practiced and he hopped down a few more steps. 'Jesus! I didn't think there were so many damn stairs here!' Yahiko thought as he tried to get down to the bottom as fast as he could. Unfortunately for him, that wasn't very fast. 'Need water... need rest... maybe I should just take a seat and see her later... Aw, get your lazy ass up and go get her! You heard Tsubame! You go get your nipples pinched!' 

With that thought in mind and his nipples burning, Yahiko ran down the steps again, but he paused when he was about a third away from the bottom so he could catch his breath, much to the audience's amusement. Yahiko barely noticed the boy he had talked to before, the one that had told him where he could find Misao on his first visit over to band camp, until he irritatingly tapped him on the shoulder.

"You suck, retard!" the boy said, his voice not at all demeaning, but Yahiko could tell that it was meant to sound like it. Yahiko stopped in his tracks, half thankful for the boy's interruption so he could have a moment's rest.

"Blow me!" Yahiko shot back and he lifted up the huge trumpet to the boy's face and blew as hard as he could, quickly extending the rod so that it came into direct contact with the younger boy's nose. This made the trumpet scream out another blaring roar while also muffling the boy's startled cry.

After the boy fell back in his seat and Yahiko finished contemplating if he should hit him with the trumpet again, he ran down the rest of the steps with the instrument high in the air.

It took him eight minutes in total but Yahiko was finally able to get to the bottom of the steps. Eagerly, he ran up the stage, discarding the trumpet to the side as if it were of no importance whatsoever and took up more of his time trying to get to Misao. The counselor frowned at the crude display towards the expensive instrument, but he didn't interfere with Yahiko and Misao as "Petey" went over to embrace her.

Yahiko, sweat overridden on his face because of the huge rush to get there in time and then his run down the millions of stairs, was forced to practically crawl over on his hands and knees to where Misao stood, anxiously awaited him with open arms. Immediately, he stood up from his almost fetal position and grabbed her by the waist, spinning her around in huge circles until they were both too dizzy to remember where they were. Finally, he set her down on the ground, holding her as close as he dared with all the little kids in the audience.

"Yahiko, what are you doing here? I thought you and Tsubame were..." Misao started, but Yahiko cut her off as he placed his index finger to her lips. 

"Shh!" he said, smiling brighter than she had ever seen and he pointed at himself. 

"How's this for a band camp story?" Yahiko asked, a winning smile playing across his lips as he leaned down and kissed her as best he could, pulling her closer to him and using all the tips and tricks Misao had ever taught him on the subject. Misao smiled against his mouth, thinking all the while of what a great job she did in teaching him all he knew. 

"Come on, everybody! Give it up for Petey!" a man yelled from the audience and the entire crowd exploded in an uproar of applause, almost startling the couple out of their kiss. 

Suddenly remembering where they were, Yahiko and Misao reluctantly pulled away, only to realize that they had an entire crowd of spectators on their hands. Smiling nervously, Yahiko took hold of Misao's hand and they both bowed and curtsied before the crowd, their deafening clapping exceeding in it's volume. 

"Let's go, Bitch," Misao said, offering her hand to his and he gladly accepted it before they both climbed down from the stage, running out of the auditorium hand in hand as even the young boy, now with a bloody nose and a bruised ego, cheered the happy couple on.

  
  
  
  


Meanwhile, Chou lazily stood in the doorway of the kitchen, a cup of beer in each hand, one intended for himself, the other for whoever the "lucky" girl was that had the misfortune to get hit on by him. Of course, Chou didn't think this. 

'Sweet digs,' Chou thought with a nod of approval as he overlooked the party and it's guests. He was looking for something original; someone that stood out from the crowd, someone that grabbed his attention, someone with... Chou's thoughts trailed off as he unconsciously gave his full concentration to a very pretty looking red haired woman standing in the corner by herself. 'Well, whadda ya know? Sweet ladies too. Mina now has been targeted for Chou-ination...'

Confidently, Chou strolled over to her, his best smile on his face, and he dished out his usual line.

"Mina... The Chou-inator depicts strange heat at a distance of a few meters. Preparing to deploy beer," Chou began as he handed her one of the beer cups in his hand. 

Mina wasn't sure if he saw her rolling her eyes and just chose to ignore it or if he really was as thick-headed as she thought and hadn't noticed at all. After a while, Mina started to figure that maybe Chou got off when girls rejected him. 

'Good,' Mina thought as she accepted the cup he offered and gulped down as much as she could manage, 'I could use a drink if I'm gonna stand with this creep.' It took only a few seconds, but Mina was successfully able to finish the beer in one long chug. Then, setting it down on the mantle piece of the fire place, she contemplated on whether or not she should just crush the empty cup against Chou's head as he droned on and on about his Chou-inating "skills." Frankly, Mina was getting sick and tired of it and she was sure that the whole world was too and it was time he knew it.

"So the Chou-inator said to him, 'I ain't no broom...'" Chou continued, grinning that stupid grin of his that Mina wanted to smack right off with the heaviest object she could find, but instead, she settled on some other kind of abuse.

"Okay! That's it! Chou, shut up and listen to me," Mina suddenly interrupted, giving him her most serious look that was torn between being majorly pissed off and wanting to pull out all her hair and scream. 

None the less, Chou kinda took this as a good sign since she had been listening to him for about two minutes now when most girls would already told him to fuck off. He found the fact that she was actually gonna start conversation as well was also a four star job on his part.

"Yes, Mina?" 

"You're a dork," Mina stated bluntly and Chou managed one blink before he stuttered out something along the lines of 'Please repeat previous statement.' Mina sighed even louder. "Think about it. This whole Chou-inator thing isn't working. It hasn't worked before, it's not working now, and it never will. And you can bet your sorry ass that isn't gonna work on me! Think of this as my favor to you and take my advice. You gotta try using some other way to pick-up girls. I mean, seriously, if I wanted to get it on with a machine, I'd go hump the microwave. And I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this, but even the damn refrigerator has more sex appeal than your whole wannabe Terminator act does. And it's NOT because the magnets are shiny!"

"Whoa! Warning! Warning! The Chou-inator does not compute such misuse to the equipment. Don't try to override the system!" Chou exclaimed, sounding slightly hurt and still not able to get the picture that his weird way of speaking was not at all attractive, "Hasta la vista, Mina!" 

And with that, Chou walked away, his pride taken down a few notches more than usual after hitting on a girl. What Mina said about his Chou-inator thing was hitting him; and it was hitting him hard. In fact, Chou found that her telling him to fuck off actually would've been a bit more gentle on his ego. It was really pathetic that it took about twenty dozen turn-downs by women until he actually realized that his way of trying to get a girl was not working out the way he wanted it to. For once in his life, the Chou-inator's mind was strangely coming together and he suddenly envied the refrigerator. 

Mina watched him go, rolling her eyes at his back as he disappeared down the hall, and she turned to the first beer she saw on top of the mantle of the fire place and she drank it all down in one gulp.

"Freak..." Mina muttered under her breath and she tossed the cup aside into the open fire, watching as the plastic cup burned into black nothings against the blazing flames. 

Just then, the front door opened and she looked up to see Kenshin and Kaoru walk through the door, his arm around her shoulders, her arm around his waist, and both smiling so wide Mina thought their faces might crack. Immediately, her annoyance with Chou went down, replaced with happy thoughts that Kaoru and Kenshin were meant to be together. She really was happy for them, but inwardly she sighed, knowing that in Kenshin's perspective, she would always be in the background.

She managed to give Kenshin a smile when he noticed her eyes on them and he returned it and waved her over. Surprised and a little on the reluctant side, Mina strode over to them, a wary smile on her face. For a moment, Kaoru turned her attention away from someone she had been talking to and looked at her friend, and Mina was grateful to see that her face didn't show any signs of preparations for an all out cat fight.

"Kaoru, I know what you must think of me right now, but I think you should hear me out. I just wanted to say that I'm really sorry for being such an idiot and..." Mina began, but Kaoru stopped her with a raise of her hand, the corners of her mouth curving up as she did so.

"No, Mina, it's okay. You don't have to explain anything to me, Kenshin already told me the whole story. I'm not mad at you. Instead, I'm actually a little mad at myself right now. Maybe I was being selfish for not letting you tell me that you had feelings for him, I just thought that you and him didn't get along. It was half my fault for assuming all these wrong things and I hope we can still be friends," Kaoru suggested, a tiny smile on her face and she put out her hand to shake, "I wouldn't want a silly little misunderstanding like this to get in the way of our friendship, Mina. So, truce?"

"Truce," Mina agreed and she gladly took Kaoru's hand to shake, holding it tight in the way she imagined she would on the couple's wedding day, which she knew was probably a lot closer than anyone else thought. 

But at the thought of their wedding, a sly smile came across her face and she unexpectedly grabbed Kenshin and Kaoru around their necks, surprising them both when she gave them both a huge bear hug. 

"So, now that that's all cleared up, we can get back to business. Now, I made sure the pool tables downstairs are not occupied so whatever you guys have planned, heheh, you'll be doing it in your own privacy." This earned her the scene of Kenshin and Kaoru blushing at her well known knowledge about last year's prom activities and Mina laughed at the identical red faces of her friends. "What? You think I didn't know about that?! You've gotta be kidding me... Well, what are you two still standing around here listening to me for?! Go already!" Mina encouraged and she gave them a light push over to the basement, "Come on! Don't make me sing!"

Immediately, Kaoru ran for the steps at that and Kenshin, smiling, mouthed a little 'thank you' to her before he opened the door that led down to the basement. Placing his hand on the small of Kaoru's back, they quickly climbed down the steps, and locked the door behind them. 

Relieved, Mina gave a happy sigh, her hands on her hips as she shook her head at the two. 'It looks like the best woman won then, huh?' Mina thought to herself, 'Dang! I'm STILL not drunk yet? Well, better go work on that...' 

Completely motivated to get herself wasted, Mina walked down the hall to the kitchen, passing by a very depressed looking Tsubame at the kitchen counter, twirling her mixing straw in her beer cup and boringly blowing bubbles into it.

Chou, also in a depressed state, plopped down in the seat next to her, his hair losing some of it's gravity-defying height as it flopped over to the side, mirroring his lack of enthusiasm to the way the night was turning out. He made no move to fix it.

"Life's a bitch, ain't it?" Chou muttered, taking a random beer cup off the counter and he drank it down half-way. Tsubame didn't bother to answer and Chou didn't fail to notice. "It's okay, you don't have to answer me. I'm used to being ignored by now, laughed at, had rumors about, the whole nine yards... Come on, Chou, be the 'Chou-inator! Hmph, what a load a crap..."

"The Chou-inator? Oh! Like the movie! That's pretty clever," Tsubame said with an amused laugh and she turned her attention to the guy next to her for the first time. 

She had seen him around school before, but never really talked to him. Tsubame was sure that she heard a rumor about some guy named Chou going around school last year; something about him and a girl named Kamatari. Either way, she wasn't about to remember it. (Lucky for Chou, Tsubame left the school before prom so she wasn't there to hear that Kamatari was a guy and see Chou wet his pants in front of the entire senior class.)

"Yeah, okay, I get it. Maybe I am a dork," Chou admitted, not quite understanding the fact that Tsubame had just complimented him on his Chou-inator act. After all, he wasn't used to it. "I can't believe I lost to a fridge..."

At the mention of him being a dork, Tsubame turned to fully face him, suddenly interested in how this conversation was turning out. Her eyes scanned over him like a hawk targeting it's prey and she realized that he was, in fact, a dork; which just happened to be exactly what she had been looking for this whole time and a wide smile crossed over her pretty features.

"You ARE a dork!" Tsubame exclaimed excitedly and she happily grabbed his hand, "Quick! Say dorky things!"

"Huh?!" Chou asked in confusion, not sure if she was interested in him or if she just wanted another reason to make fun of him. He chose the first one. "Okay, um... I am the Chou-inator. Stuff like that?"

"Yeah! More!" Tsubame demanded, getting very intrigued in his strange appeal to her. But with every minute that Tsubame got more interested, Chou got more encouraged and well, even though only a couple of seconds passed by, he felt like he could take over the world.

"I AM the Chou-inator. A crazy sex robot sent back through time to change the life of one lucky lady! You, Tsubame, have been targeted for Chou-ination. Come with me if you want to live!" Chou said, whipping out his 'best' line as he grabbed her hand and lead her up the stairs, Tsubame laughing behind him.

"Okay, now it's time for you to DO dorky things!" she commanded as she pushed him into the nearest unoccupied room upstairs, her voice almost threatening, and the door slammed shut in seconds.

  
  
  
  


Meanwhile, there were two specific people that had been observing the insane act from the sidelines and had now successfully accomplished the task of hitting their jaw to the carpet.

"No FUCKING way!" Mina and Saito exclaimed in unison as they saw the two people that were complete opposites run up the stairs together and well... the rest was just unmentionable. 

Realizing their shared shock, Saito and Mina slowly turned to each other, and it suddenly occurred to them the person standing next to them wasn't that bad looking. Mina raised an eyebrow, Saito smirked, and all the while both looked each other up and down, checking out the merchandise with slight nods of approval here and there. Mina was the first to snap out of it as she realized just who she was considering her potential one night stand victim to be.

"Forget it," Mina said with a shake of her head, changing her mind of any thoughts of hooking up with the narrow eyed jerk.

"Yeah, not like you had a chance!" Saito recovered, drawing in another breath from his cigarette and they both turned away from each other. Mina quickly headed back over to the keg, thinking that she must've had way too much to drink if she was actually considering sleeping with Saito, and Saito walked over to the door, which had been ringing for about two minutes already, and tried to stop the visions he had earlier of mentally undressing her. 

"Alright, alright, I'm gettin' there! Jesus, would you just hang on for one damn second..." Saito grumbled at the closed door and he finally flung the thing open. His voice slowly trailed off when he caught sight of Yumi and Shura standing in the doorway, pleasant smiles on their faces, like the most innocent of angels. Fortunately, Saito already knew what kind of 'angels' these girls were. "What the hell do you chicks want? This isn't no lesbian party. Try the house down the street." Saito then motioned to the house across the way to prove his assumption, but neither Yumi or Shura made any move from their place in the doorway. Instead, the two women exchanged confused glances.

"Lesbians? We never said that," Shura said, looking over at Yumi with a puzzled face, "Did you say we were lesbians?"

"Nope. We never said we were lesbians," Yumi clarified with a shrug of her shoulders and she turned back to Saito, "Where did you hear that, Hajime?"

"Whoa, hold up a second here! So you mean to tell me that you two are completely straight and just grab each others' asses a lot?" Saito asked, completely forgetting about his resent for his first name, and after a nod from both women, Saito's eyes widened in anticipation, "I see... Okay, hear this now 'cause I won't say it again: I will do anything to sleep with you chicks! I'll grab anybody's ass in this entire house! Hell, I'll go across the street and grab the neighbor's ass if you want! I'll kiss anyone and everyone in this room! Guys, chicks, everybody! I'll shave some ass if they need it! I'll...!"

"Hajime, what's going on?" Tokio asked as she stepped up from behind Shura and Yumi, just arriving from her house in Tokyo and she gave her boyfriend a perplexed look, "What about shaving someone's ass?"

"Tokio! Uh.... you're here! Now! With me! Uh... well, you see, about that stuff I was just saying, I uh..." Saito stumbled, glad that nobody around knew him well enough to throw it in his face that Hajime Saito actually had nothing to say. Uncertain, Saito looked from his girlfriend to the two said-to-be-lesbians and back. 

"See ya, ladies!" Saito announced and before Yumi or Shura could utter a word of protest, he shoved them out the door. Quickly, he grabbed Tokio's arm, pulling her inside and into his arms and he confidently put his arm around her, all in one fluid motion. He had no trouble at all ignoring Yumi and Shura cursing outside. 

"Hey babe!" Saito said over the girls' threatening shouts from behind the door and he turned Tokio's chin to face him when she questioningly looked at the rattling entrance, "Took you long enough to show up! Now, why don't we continue that whole kinky wine thing again outside, hm? But uh... let's try and keep it strictly wine this time, okay?"  
  


A/N: Chou and Tsubame? Yeah, I know... Wrong in more ways than one. ^^ That's what happened according to the movie so don't blame me! Blame = flames = me no happy. Sorry for not updating in forever. Got kinda caught up in "All I See Is Black And White." Newayz, I'll try to update faster. It helps if you click that little button at the bottom of the screen and gimme some encouragement! nudge, nudge, hint, hint 


	16. The Real Party

Chapter 15:

"The Real Party"  
  


It was almost midnight by the time Yahiko and Misao arrived at the party from the East Falls band camp concert, partially because Yahiko forgot how to get there and also for the fact that Misao refused to drive properly. It amazed Yahiko sometimes on how fast one person could speed down a 25 mph speed limit street and not get caught. Still, he could just as easily understand her rush to get to the beach house since being at the beach house meant being in the bedroom and being in the bedroom automatically meant a HUGE party for two. 

They both just barely missed the sight of Tsubame and Chou heading up the stairs to do whatever weird and disturbing things, not fit for writing down, would happen. But even if they had arrived only seconds earlier to see it, it was very doubtful that they would have noticed anything else but each other.

Grinning from ear to ear, Misao hurriedly pushed Yahiko inside, who was by now, too shaken up from the car ride that practically had him wetting his pants to figure out how to balance his upper body. In an instant, Yahiko fell forward, his eyes wide in surprise, and he reached out to try and grab whatever blessed thing there was near him that could prevent his face from meeting the booze-covered carpet. The thing he grabbed onto however happened to be a former classmate of his that was unfortunately standing in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Whirling around and expecting someone completely different to be latched onto his behind, Shishio's cocky smile drooped into a flat line as he came face to face with a familiar head of black spiky hair.

"What the...? Dude, did you just grab my ass?"

Definitely not a good question. Yahiko's first reaction was to run and hide, but knowing him, he would have most likely hid behind some transparent curtains with the thought of, 'If I can't see you, you can't see me!' where he could easily be seen. Yahiko's second choice of action was to pretend he was too drunk to tell the difference between a man's ass and the staircase. Instead, he decided on something much better.

"Um... N... no, but uh... Saito just walked by and I heard he was into that man-ass-grabbing stuff," Yahiko pointed out and at the look of disgust on Shishio's face, it took the smaller man more than a handful of energy to keep a straight face with his next sentence, "Yeah, he once asked me to give him a handjob."

"That sick fuck..." Shishio muttered under his breath, obviously believing every word Yahiko dished out and suddenly snapping out of his daze, he whipped back to face him, "He out there on the porch?"

"Um... sure..." Yahiko shrugged, uncertain.

"Here, hold my beer for a second," Shishio said as he handed the relieved Yahiko the plastic dixie cup he had been drinking from, "I've been holdin' in a bucket load of piss since I got here." And with that, Shishio walked off toward the stairs, grabbing onto the collar of Houji on his way up with a hushed whisper of, "Cover me, I gotta go piss off the balcony again."

After the longest ten seconds of Yahiko's life, his face finally broke off into the widest grin his face allowed.

"HAHAHAHA! Whoo! Misao, hey, did you see that?! He just...!" Yahiko stopped, his ranting suddenly trailing off as he realized that he was the only one laughing like a hyena and he yet again, looked pretty stupid doing so. Turning in several 360 degree circles in search of his girlfriend, Yahiko's eyebrows lifted to inhumane heights. "Uh... Misao? Misao...?" Scratching his head in confusion, Yahiko frowned at the lack of echoed laughter he was so used to sharing with his favorite band camp girl that had so unexpectedly vanished into thin air. "Hm... that's funny. I swear she was right here a second ag... WHOA!" 

His back hit the floor. Hard. The word, "Ouch!" didn't even begin to cover it and before he could even recover from his shock and mutter some inappropriate profanities to his "mugger," a hand clamped down on the back of his shirt and gradually began dragging him up the stairs. Well, let's point out the traits of this mystery person that we have collected so far. One, he/she is freakishly strong. Two, he/she is dragging him up the stairs, much like a scenario at his prom. Three, he/she smells like cheap perfume that one can only buy at MacFrugal's. Indeed, Yahiko may be dumb, but it was more than obvious who was bringing him up the stairs. If this sort of thing had happened to him while he was still in high school, Yahiko would have kicked and screamed for his life, but because that wasn't the case, he was remotely calm. 

Honestly, he didn't really remember what happened the last time he and Misao got together at prom since he was a little too dazed from the head to floor collision he had just had (and was still having) as his skull came into contact with each step his "captor" climbed. Yet his memory was suddenly reawakened when Misao finally lugged him into his laundry-overridden room and threw him against the farthest wall. His back smacked against the wall with a loud thud, knocking over the picture frame by the window of some miscellaneous family portrait. Although the collision was quite harsh, he paid no attention to the pain, after all, he was somewhat of an experienced person when it came to Misao's freaky way of beginning sex.

Throughout the entire being-thrown-across-the-room-about-a-dozen-times deal, Yahiko couldn't help but smile. 'I could get used to this,' he thought as his back slammed down onto the floor once again and he barely winced as he was immediately pounced upon by a very energetic Misao.

"Say Uncle!" Misao shouted at him, her hands clawing at his clothes. They weren't as expensive as his prom tuxedo so it didn't really matter to Yahiko.

"Huh?!"

"Oh! I mean!" Misao corrected herself, giggling at her mistake for about two seconds until she suddenly turned serious again, "What's my name? Say my name, Bitch!"

"Misao," Yahiko said simply, putting his hands behind his head as he waited for her to get on with her whole half-abusive-but-totally-erotic sex ritual. Yahiko gave her his best smile, more of an ear to ear grin actually, and Misao laughed.

Leaning low to where she had him imprisoned underneath her, she quickly undid the belt at his waist and threw it out the window, ignoring the startling yelp of someone that had caught it with their face outside. Smiling, Misao captured his lips with hers in a not too gentle way, leaving them both no space to breathe. Suddenly, she pushed back and sat upright again as an amusing thought entered her head.

"Hey, I've got an idea!" she exclaimed, pointing one finger up at the ceiling as if she had just discovered some kind of new found element that all scientists had overlooked, "You're always MY bitch whenever uh... well... okay, you're just my bitch. But how's about this time, I'll be yours!"

"ALRIGHT!!! Now we're talkin'!" Yahiko exclaimed excitedly and he eagerly rubbed his hands together in anticipation, his tongue sticking out at the side of his mouth as he tried to conjure up his best fantasies, "Okay, I'm in control then, huh? Heheh... This is gonna be good... Hm, what to do first, what to do first.... Okay, um... how about...?" Yahiko trailed off, his mind slipping from an unusual fantasy involving a lot of water, as another idea nipped him in the back of his brain, an idea that was actually quite appealing at the moment. "Well, there's uh... I dunno if you'd wanna do it or anything, but..."

"What is it?" Misao asked, strangely eager to hear if her boyfriend had some kind of dream she could take up as her duty to fulfill, "Does this have anything to do with ropes and a chair? Or melted chocolate? Wait... this doesn't have any super glue involved, right?"

"Um... no," Yahiko answered with a scratch of his head as nervous sweat began to drip down his neck and uncertainty crept into his thoughts. Yeah, sure, Misao was strange alright, but this was quite a random fantasy. "It's a little weirder than all that and uh... a whole lot less dangerous than the super glue."

"Tell me already!" 

"Okay... well, uh..." Yahiko took in one last deep breath and finally said, "Have you ever experimented with baked goods?"  
  


  
  


Mina was growing curious. Okay, fine, she was extremely curious. Kenshin and Kaoru had been down in the basement for a good half hour now and Mina had been waiting in the living room for them to come out so she could give them both a good hard noogie. So far, neither person had exited the door she had so enthusiastically ushered them to and she was starting to grow restless with anticipation.

Whatever they were doing couldn't take that long, could it? Unless...

'I shouldn't be doing this...' Mina thought to herself as she quietly tiptoed over to the basement door that was undoubtedly securely locked on the other side, 'I might hear something I shouldn't and then...'

Mina's thoughts trailed off and her foot stopped midair as she was finally able to hear a few hushed whispers coming from behind the door. Leaning in close, she pressed her right ear right above the knob and heard...

"KENSHIN!!!"

A loud crash was heard from the top of the staircase leading down to the lower level floor as Mina fell backwards in shock and coincidently knocked over a dresser near the wall. But the damage didn't stop there, oh no, it seemed that all the furniture had been lined up like dominos and one by one, they knocked one another over until practically every table and chair fell to the floor.

"What was that?" Kenshin asked curiously as he looked up to the right of the ceiling, expecting to see the room shaking and reverberating from some kind of tyrannizing earthquake, "Are we being bombed?" 

"Of course we're not getting bombed! That's just God getting angry with you for getting your foot stuck in the pocket AGAIN!" Kaoru shouted into his ear in frustration and she slipped out from underneath his body. Impatient from yet another delay to their getting it on, she rolled her eyes, shaking her head at his stupidity, and went over to the corner of the table where his foot was captured by the tiny hole.

"I'm really sorry, Kaoru, that I am!" Kenshin said. To Kaoru, he sounded just like a broken record since he seemed to have said the exact same thing the last time this happened. As Kaoru wrestled with his leg to unstick him from the pool table, tugging with all her might, she barely noticed that she was causing Kenshin pain; that is, until he screamed: "Oro! OW! Kaoru! That hurts!"

"Well, you should've thought of that before you got your foot stuck in there again! This can really ruin the mood you know," Kaoru snapped back, her hormones lending her the strength to fight the "evil captor of her love" and she gave one last final pull on his leg, "LET GO!"

Almost automatically, Kenshin's foot popped out of the pool table pocket and the force sent Kaoru flying back down onto the table into their original position. Kenshin easily caught her by the waist, but got the wind knocked out of him when she landed on top of his chest.

(Insert overly loud, "Oof!" here.)

"Oh my god! Kenshin! Are you okay?!" Kaoru asked worriedly and she hurriedly checked on his rib cage for any fractures, trying her best to be concerned as her want drove her to play doctor in a not so docterly way, "I didn't mean to land on you. Can you breathe?"

"I'm fine, Kaoru, that I am. Just got the wind knocked out of me, that's all," Kenshin said, his happy-go-lucky smile returning to his face in support of his answer. He had absolutely no complaints at that moment with the girl of his dreams straddling him, even if he held no more feeling in his lower body. Kenshin bit his tongue from asking her if she had gained any weight recently.

"Good," she said and she bent down to give him a much earned kiss. 

The pool table under them swayed a bit from under their weight, most likely because of much abuse it had handled that night and because Kaoru did weigh a bit more than she would ever admit. It wobbled for only a few brief seconds, holding them in the air in their tight embrace until it finally collapsed to the ground. 

Unharmed and completely preoccupied with themselves, neither seemed to notice that the pool table no longer stood up on four legs and instead was lying completely flat on the floor. After a few seconds of some serious lip-locking, they realized they were human, and Kenshin finally came up for air. Kaoru, also out of breath, pushed her hair over her shoulder and out of her face, and settled her head down on his shoulder for a light break before the big finale would begin. 

Kenshin smiled and lightly ran a hand over her bare back, twirling a few silky strands of her waist-length hair through his fingers as he bent down to kiss her brow. It was moments like these that Kenshin had missed most, but unfortunately couldn't have because of a certain narrow-eyed asshole that threatened to kill him if he so much as looked at Kaoru. The only time he had actually been free to spend time with her was their time at the beach house, which even then Saito pushed them away. It was his fault in the beginning that Kenshin didn't even get to see Kaoru play volleyball that day (heheheh...) Speaking of volleyball... Giving a small cough, Kenshin cleared his throat, unsure if he should ruin the intimate moment or give up the upcoming conversation topic.

"Um, Kaoru?" Kenshin began, pulling the length of his collar nervously.

"Hm?" she practically purred in response as she lightly nuzzled his cheek. 

"You have a bikini, right?"

Meanwhile, behind the door, Mina was anxiously trying to get away and run from the overpowering mess that she refused to have anything to do with making it. Giving all viewers a shaky drunken smile, she quickly picked up a fallen vase off the floor and lightly placed it back on a turned over shelf at her feet.

"Eheheh... yeah, you know how these beach houses are..." she said with a shrug as she leaned against the wall, "Too many expensive curtains from IKEA, not enough wood from Home Depot..."   
  


  
  


"So..." Sanosuke started, looking at Megumi with his most serious face, "Was he a better singer than me?"

"For the tenth time, NO! He wasn't," Megumi replied with a roll of her eyes, tired of her boyfriend's constant and annoying questions that had so far kept them from doing anything interesting. Frankly, she wasn't in all that much of a mood to talk. "You are a much better singer than Aoshi is or ever could be and you are the KING of everything! There! Are you happy now?"

Okay, so the real question she wanted to ask him was, "Are you ready now?" They had been up in Sanosuke's room for a good hour and a half and so far, nada action. Not that Megumi didn't like talking, but since all these "casual" questions were aimed to just boost her boyfriend's already larger-than-life ego, it wasn't too much fun for her.

"The King, eh? So, if I'm the 'King' does that mean I'm better than him at everything else too?" Sanosuke asked, persisting in the fact that he had to be better than Aoshi in every way, that way, he knew just what he had been up against. 

Megumi sighed, making a serious mental note in her head to never again let the word 'king' slip itself into the same sentence with the subject of Sanosuke. 

"And... eheheh..." Sanosuke continued with a nervous chuckle, "You didn't really mean all that stuff about his car, right?" Megumi's eyebrows creased and her teeth set into a tight grit as she grabbed for the biggest pillow on the rooster-head's bed that she could latch onto and used it to try and pummel his head in. A lot.

"Hey! What was that for?!" Sanosuke exclaimed, his arms up over his head, still blocking his face as her endless and very unexpected tirade of an armed person versus unarmed person pillow war raged on.

"Well, that was for making me call you the King and this if for...!" Megumi said as she lifted the pillow as high as her arms would go to strike him again, but Sanosuke, all too easily, snatched it away in her hesitation, "Hey! Give me that!"

"It's yours if you can get it," Sanosuke reasoned, raising the pillow over his head, behind him, behind Megumi, anywhere to keep it out of her reach, and he smiled at her poor attempt to wrestle it away from him and also for the fact that a particular upper part of her body was practically smothering his face. "You know, if you just can't wait to get your hands on me, you could've just said so." Sanosuke smirked, suggestively wiggling his eyebrows in a 'I'm-tired-of-playing-around' kind of way and Megumi immediately stopped in her climbing all over him and poked him hard in the stomach. 

A small, 'Oof!' was heard before Sanosuke lurched forward and dropped the cotton case to the mattress below. Big mistake. While he was distracted, Megumi grabbed the pillow away and hit him with it again, a little more gently this time.

"Sanosuke, you're being dirty..." Megumi said with a sigh, although the tone of her voice didn't show the least bit of negativity. Before she could hit him over the head again, Sanosuke tackled her down and grabbed her around the stomach, catching her completely off guard. Surprised, she let out a startled squeal of laughter, letting the pillow drop to the floor.

"Oh, I'M the dirty one?! You're the one that wanted phone sex!" he protested, pulling her down underneath the covers as she half-heartedly tried to get away from his hold on her waist, "You're the one that was touching yourself over the phone! And then you have the nerve to say that I'M dirty?!"

"Yes."

"Hm... fair enough," Sanosuke said with a shrug and he pulled the covers over both their heads so a little different kind of wrestling could resume.  
  


  
  


"HA-JI-ME!!!" Tokio shouted, balling up her fists at her sides as she glared at the ex-captain of the lacrosse team from across the room, "I am not getting in that bed until you tell me just who those two girls were!"

This day could not get any worse. First, a very horrible and unmentionable incident happened to him to the back porch for the second time that month. Second, while he went to take a shower and rid himself of the um... warm wine, Tokio insisted on flushing the toilet every three to four seconds while he was in there, giving him nothing but freezing cold water. And third, now he was squeaky clean, dressed only in a damp towel under the covers, and his girlfriend was having some kind of psychological problem with joining him. Or at least having some severe case of a man's worst nightmare: PMS. For the fifth time that day, Saito rolled his eyes and felt again the urge to take a long drag from a cigarette. Unfortunately, he had none and it was getting harder by the second not to scream. 

"Look, I already told you! I worked for them for a summer job!" Saito repeated through gritted teeth and he waited an entire minute for her to protest again. Seeing that she wasn't going to, he smiled and gave a welcoming pat to the place beside him on the bed for her to join him at last. The only thing he received was a slap across the face. "Ow! Jesus! I'm telling the truth! I had to fix up their house!" 

Saito frowned, rubbing his reddened cheek while Tokio stood over him, her eyes almost as narrow as his, and she turned up her nose to the ceiling, crossing her arms over her chest, and turned her back on him in refusal. Saito sighed and inched down the edge of the bed so that he was sitting right next to her standing form. Gently, he reached out his hand and ran it over her arm, putting on his best 'feed-the-hungry-children-of-Africa' face in the process. Tokio glanced over her shoulder at him and turned away after seeing his begging expression.

"Nope, I'm not getting into that bed until you tell me just who they really are," Tokio persisted, her arms never leaving their crossed position over her chest, "You tell me or you're gonna be sleeping in that cold bed yourself! You slept with them, didn't you?!"

"Not even if there were a million of them." Tokio still didn't looked convinced and at her silent refusal, Saito sighed. "Well, I guess I'm just gonna have to tell you something to clear my name then, huh?" Saito asked, pulling her down to sit next to him on the edge of the bed and he turned to face her, tilting her chin up so she could look into his bronze-flecked eyes, "I wasn't really supposed to tell anyone this, but you're an exception...." Tokio gave him a look that read: 'I'm-not-really-following-you' and Saito turned his head, looking from side to side for any unknown witnesses that could be lurking in the innermost corners of the room. Realizing that there were none, he turned back to her and whispered in her ear, "Those girls are lesbians."  
  


  
  


"I think he's dead," Suzume whispered to her older sister, Ayame.

Both girls were up early that day so that they could collect some sea shells on the beach and maybe make a sand castle or two when they stumbled upon a man buried up to his neck in the cream colored sand. The man's eyes were closed, most of his hair and face was covered with bird dung and he didn't appear to be in any condition to get himself out. 

Without a word, Ayame ran a little farther down the beach and grabbed something that had washed ashore over the night. Running back to her older sister, she held up her find in the air like a trophy and kneeled back down in front of the buried man, examining him with her eyes. Both girls, only four and six years old, tilted their heads sideways to get a better look at him, Suzume's pig tails sweeping across the sand as she bent her head to the right.

"You really think so?" Ayame asked, squinting her eyes to try and look past all the piles and piles of bird poop covering his face, "That's so sad..."

"I wonder how he got here..." Suzume said curiously and then she turned to her sister, who was now wiping her eyes with the back of her hands as she fought back tears, "Hey! I know! Let's poke him with the stick!"

"Yeah! Let's poke him!" Ayame repeated, lifting the thin branch up in the air again, her depression suddenly gone and was now replaced with an endearing smile. Cautiously, both girls held their breath as Ayame inched the stick closer and closer to the supposed dead man. She stopped about half an inch away from his face and started giggling, causing her to steer the stick off course and it collided not-so-gently with his closed right eyelid.

"Ow! What the hell...?!" Aoshi cried as something hard and pointy hit him in the eye and he opened his left eye, still in good shape to look at the culprit. His vision focused on a pair of little girls kneeling in front of him, one holding a tiny stick in her hand and the other holding a long seashell in hers. "Who are you?" Aoshi asked in a coarse voice, his throat dry and parched from all his scolding at the birds the day before. He would have killed for a glass of ice water. Cautious, he looked from one girl to the other, both with anxious looks in their faces, and Aoshi frowned, completely confused as to what they were up to. 

"Poke him again!" Suzume exclaimed and both girls lifted their objects toward him again, excited expressions on their faces as they hovered the sticks close to his face and they began jabbing at him repeatedly without mercy.

"Hey! Quit it! What do you think you're doing?!" Aoshi cried, but his protests only gave the girls more motivation and they only poked him harder, one even succeeded in getting him in the eye again, "OW! Cut it out, you little brats! What the...?! Stop that right now!" To his surprise, the girls did stop and Aoshi opened both his eyes to look up at them. His spirits died back down when he saw them chattering away back and forth to each other and when they finished their little huddle meeting, they turned to him and grinned mischievously. "What the hell are you kids gonna do to me?" Aoshi asked, watching them as they got up with understanding nods, "What kind of kids are you?!"

"Let's find bigger sticks!" Ayame exclaimed and she and Suzume ran off in opposite directions down the beach to find bigger sticks than the previous ones. Aoshi's eyes darted back and forth as he looked for some kind of escape route, hoping with all his might that some kind-hearted person would stroll by and help him out of this mess, but he saw neither.

In the distance, Aoshi could hear the people at the beach house rustling about as they began to pack up their things in their cars to head back home and Aoshi's face drooped. He could hear bits and pieces of what they were saying and he was able to hear the car engine start up of Sanosuke's crap-of-a-car jeep. Aoshi gulped back his last hope. He could hear Megumi talking to him as she opened the car door.

"Hey, Rooster-Head..." Megumi began, her hand pausing on the door handle as she hesitated to take her seat inside.

"Hm?" Sanosuke asked in response as he turned on the radio, turning the station to his favorite alternative music station and putting the volume up to put his speakers to their best potential. Sanosuke paused for a second, listening again for what he thought he heard was a cry for help, but he only shrugged his shoulders as he realized it was probably just a seagull.

"I can't shake the feeling that we're forgetting something..." Megumi said hesitantly, looking back at the beach house as she tried to pinpoint just what exactly she might have forgotten.

'Lipstick? In my purse. Wallet? In my pocket. Clothes? In the trunk. Boyfriend? In the car. Hm...' Megumi went on like this for another minute or so, but unfortunately for Aoshi, the title, "Rich guy who tried to make a move on me" didn't appear on her list of things to remember to bring home.

Finally, after about twenty seconds of rethinking her entire luggage accessories, Megumi shrugged and settled down in the passenger seat next to her boyfriend. "I guess it was just nothing," she replied as she strapped in her seatbelt, "Alright, let's get going then."

Sanosuke put the gear in reverse, placed his hand behind Megumi's head rest, and glanced backwards as he backed the jeep out of the driveway. Once it was in the street, he changed the gear to drive and stepped on the gas pedal. The jeep had just reached the first stop sign when both Megumi and Sanosuke heard an excruciating shriek of, "NOOOOOOOOO!" They both turned and frowned at each other in confusion, turning their heads back to look in the direction they thought they heard the sound, but only shrugged their shoulders when the sound died off.

"Eh... I guess it was nothing important," Sanosuke said as he took his foot off the brake and continued on past the stop sign.

"Yeah," Megumi replied as she comfortably rested her head against his shoulder, "Let's just go home...  
  


  
  


A/N: And.... IT'S OVER! AHHHHHHH! Can you believe it?! I can't! Sorry for taking so long in updating! I had to come up with the ending chapter so it took up a lot of thinking. Hopefully you guys enjoyed reading this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. I've got an epilogue coming up too to let you know what happened to the characters later on and I'm also thinking about making a Japanese Pie 3! If you think it should just stop at two, review. If you think I should add another story of hilarious laughs, review. Pretty much, just REVIEW! If I get enough requests for the story, I'll put in a preview in the epilogue-thingy. Thanks so much to everyone who read! You guys rock!


	17. Japanese Pie 3 Preview!

Preview for Japanese Pie 3  
  


"Are you sure you wanna do this?" Yahiko asked through his nervousness; he hated that his hands started shaking, "I mean, you really like this? You don't think it's a little... you know, weird?"

"The other way was weird, Yahiko."

"I sure didn't think so," he replied with a scratch of his head and turning, he scanned his eyes over the once familiar surroundings of the room that had changed so dramatically since he was last there only a few hours ago. Not sure what he was supposed to do first, he gave an incoherent mutter of curses. "Okay, this is kinda freaking me out. It doesn't even look like the apartment anymore..."

"That's the point, Yahiko," Misao said with a sigh, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world and she had no patience for blind men. Misao found that folding her arms over her chest kept them in place and helped resist the urge to smack him. Hard.

"What is?" he asked, clueless as usual. 

"This isn't supposed to be difficult!" she suddenly shouted in exasperation and she sat up from her seat on the mattress and paced over to the small balcony at the side of the room. The balcony was now covered with flower petals on the floor and decorated with strange red and pink veils that she found romantic and cute but her boyfriend only found confusing. Turning back to face him, Misao gave him a look that read 'What-in-the-world-is-the-matter-with-you?!' but Yahiko was used to that fiery look in her eyes as 'Come-here-you!'

Innocently, he smiled at the misgiven take on her mood and at seeing his obliviousness once again to what she wanted, what every woman apparently deserved, Misao threw her hands up in the air in her frustration. Yahiko was left with a dumbfounded look in his eyes when she turned away, looking quite upset, instead of pouncing on him like he thought she would. Curiously, he tilted his head to the right as if examining her I.Q. level which he believed had undoubtedly dropped to insane stages.

"You okay there, Misao?" he asked her, his dark eyes as innocent as ever, unsure of what to do and just as naive as the first night Misao had screwed the life out of him. Yahiko sighed when she merely turned her back on him with a roll of her eyes, again, something he didn't quite get.

"What is up with you today, Misao?" Yahiko grumbled at her back, "Ever since I got home, or what you claim to tell me is home anyway, what with all these crazy gypsy thingies lying around. Ever since then, you brought me to the room, you got us on the bed, and then suddenly, the stereo starts working and you wanna dance! Which brings me to another point, since when did we get the Clapper? Nah, never mind that... the bigger question is why am I still on the bed that you brought me to..." Yahiko stopped to check his watch, "twenty-two minutes ago! and still horny, fully clothed, and somehow still conscious! Jesus, if I didn't know any better I'd think you were acting like Kaoru and Megumi..."

That last phrase was what made her snap.

"Like Kaoru and Megumi? LIKE KAORU AND MEGUMI?!?!" Misao repeated through clenched teeth and she furiously threw one of the maroon velvet pillows she had purchased that morning at his arrogant face. Watching as he doubled over and fell off the bed, she took an intimidating step forward and practically glowed with her anger. "No, I am NOT at all like Kaoru and Megumi! You wanna know why, YAHIKO MYOJIN?!"

"Uh... uh... well...I um..." Yahiko stuttered, now the only person in the world known to somehow forget the entire English language in only a few mere seconds, "um... sure???"

"Because they get more out of their relationships than I do! They get flowers, they get chocolate, they get singing telegrams on Valentine's Day sent to their work! They take bubble baths and go on cruises and they get their pagers blown up with 143's whenever we go out to the mall! They go to fancy restaurants!" Misao practically screeched and Yahiko fought not to cover his ears and anger her any more than she already was. He made a tiny bet in his mind that she would pop that vein in her forehead in about four seconds. "But us? We go to Burger King! And you know what?! I don't even like their fries! Oh and then, you go to work, you come home, and you say Misao did her best to make a whiny Yahiko voice imitation and it actually turned out quite well in fact 'Misao, I'm bored, let's go to the room. Misao, why do you always put the toilet seat down? Misao, how come all the foods gone?'" At hearing this, Yahiko gave her another quelling look since he found absolutely nothing wrong with all that. 

Getting angrier by the second, Misao continued in her shouting at him (and also practically the whole neighborhood). "As far as I know, you've never given me anything even close to a bouquet of roses or anything remotely similar to a box of chocolates in those stupid heart boxes! Where's MY candy?!?!"

Scratching his head, Yahiko straightened up and readjusted himself on the floor, finally getting a clue as to the reason why Misao was so peeved. But that may be because she practically shouted her reasoning into his ear. Smoothing out the velvet pillow that now had a very Yahiko-like shaped face print in the middle of it, he turned back to her and noticed how really angry she was. He had never seen her like this.

"So then... you want me to give you some potpourri or something and a Snickers bar?" he asked in confusion. If he hadn't scratched his head so much already, he would've done it again, but instead he just settled on crinkling up his nose at the awkward thought of Misao going ga-ga over a ninety-nine cent candy bar and some plastic flowers. It just didn't fit.

"No..." Misao said dejectedly, almost on the verge of tears and they threatened to fall even faster from the fact that Yahiko didn't even notice her tearing state, "I want you to show me you care..."

And at that, Misao slipped on her jeans and white sweatshirt and walked out the door, grabbing for the tissue box on her way out into the late afternoon day.

For ten minutes, Yahiko stayed planted at the root of his seat, as if he had just super glued himself to the floor and stapled his mouth shut. He involuntarily shuddered at the thought of super-glue. Sighing, he looked up and around him at the foreign room she had "dolled up" for his return home from work and he frowned at all the lit scented candles and dark-colored drapes. He sure didn't find this normal. Not at all. In fact, it really was freaking him out. Misao never acted like this. Ever. When he got home, she was pretty much waiting behind the door to jump him and drag him to their room. Today just didn't make any sense, especially when she said she didn't like Burger King fries... that part really shocked him. 

Deciding not to blame himself, since he couldn't find anywhere in the conversation that he had been at fault, Yahiko finally stood up and moved over to the table across the room. Crunching down on the soft red rose petals Misao had sprinkled on the carpet, he picked up his cell phone and dialing a familiar number, Yahiko lifted the phone up to his ear and waited for the person to pick up.

"Hello?"

"Okay, what the fuck did you and Megumi do to my girlfriend, UGLY?!"

A/N: You requested it and here it is! Gimme a few days and just enough reviews and I'll put up the prologue and first chapter in no time! Hope you enjoyed the story and look out for the upcoming Japanese Pie 3! Woohoo! 


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